[Part 2] "Isn't that story a bit too polished?" The sense of unease takes shape here

Hello everyone!
I am a behavioral psychologist.

I'm sorry for the late post today 😭
I was making fine-tuned adjustments until the very end...

With that said, let's continue to the main part! 🙇

In [Part 1], we looked at the "sense of unease" in the wife's narrative.

• The emphasis on "it was normal"

• Emotional stability

• The gap between words and body language

And here, one question remains.

This is the testimony of the other person, the husband, who describes the same event.

From here on, the "structure of the narrative" andthe "quality" of the narrative change.

⚠️Caution⚠️

The gestures introduced here are not "proof that someone is definitely lying," but rather examples of signs that may reveal true feelings.

According to the research of psychologist Paul Ekman, basic facial expressions such as anger, joy, sadness, fear, surprise, and disgust are recognized universally across cultures.

In other words, "facial expressions and gestures are universal human clues."

Symbolically speaking, it can be expressed as "the truth is etched on everyone's face."

However, we must not forget that the goal is not to "suspect the other person," but to understand them and provide "hospitality" that leads to better communication, and that sincerity is what matters most.

1. How did the husband tell his story?

First, what is important is not"what happened," but "how it was told."

The flow of the husband's testimony is as follows.

• The interaction near the cliff

• The wife approaches

• Contact occurs

• "I felt a shove"

• Before I knew it, there was distance

There is a characteristic to this narrative.

It is a story that is extremely 'well-organized'.

• The chronology is neat

• The explanation is smooth

• It is easy for the listener to understand

At this point, people feel the following.

However, there is a pitfall here.

'Ease of understanding' is not necessarily 'the reality of the experience'.

2. The sense of unease in a story that is too polished

We will look into this more deeply from here.

Unease ①: The expression "I felt"

This single phrase is extremely important.

Originally, strong physical contact is

often described as an action.

However, in this case, it is described as a sensation (felt).

What does this mean?

Perhaps, the possibility of avoiding the 'confirmation' of the eventcan be considered.

Sense of unease ②: The 'omission' of specificity

Looking at the narrative as a whole,

• direction

• strength of force

• body movement

such physical details are thin.

The reason for this is that I thought there is a possibility that the experience is not being traced.

Sense of unease ③: The 'smoothness' of the narrative

This is the most important part.

When people talk about an experience,

• they speak while remembering

• the timeline goes back and forth

• they get choked up with emotion

In other words, it is normal for the story to 'collapse' at least once.

However, this time,it doesn't fall apart.

Rather,it can be said that the story is complete from beginning to end.

As if it were a kind of script.

Contrast with the wife (structure)

It is only here that it finally becomes visible.

Wife

• Ambiguous

• There is a discrepancy

• Body-oriented

Husband

• Clear

• Smooth

• Language-oriented

Neither is perfect.

But what is different is, "at which layer are they speaking?".

3. "Narrative discrepancy" from the perspective of neuroscience

I will delve deeper into this here.

There are two modes of memory

① Episodic memory (reproduction of experience)

• Hippocampus

• Amygdala

• Sensory cortex

"Recreating" the scene is the area that governs this function.

Characteristics:

• Sensations are concrete

• The body moves

• There is a blockage

These are some examples.

(2) Semantic memory/reconstruction (explanation)

• Prefrontal cortex

"Organizing" information is the area used for this.

Characteristics:

• The story is smooth

• Logical

• Consistent

Key point of this session

The husband's narrative leans heavily toward (2).

In other words, it is possible that this is a construction of meaning rather than a reproduction of experience.

Brain characteristics during lying/construction

Research shows that when lying or reconstructing,

• Increased prefrontal cortex activity

• Increased cognitive load

have been confirmed.

What this produces is, "the words are polished, but the body lags behind" situation.

How does this manifest as behavior?

• Gestures decrease

• Breathing becomes shallow

• Rhythm becomes disrupted

In short, it is a story about the loss of synchronization between the brain, language, and body.

Connection with [Part 1]

Wife: Slight misalignment
Husband: Structural misalignment

It is in these parts that the sense of unease takes 'shape'.

[Part 2] Summary

1. The narrative is too organized
2. Avoiding certainty by using "I felt"
3. Weak physical details
4. Narrative in construction mode
5. The gap between brain and body widens

What is important here is that this is not yet the conclusion.

This is because this story is completed through 'contrast'.

Next Episode Preview (Part 3)

Up to this point, the pieces have been gathered.

In [Part 3], we will layer everything together.

• The wife's narrative

• The husband's narrative

• Language

• Body

And what comes into view is the true nature of that unease, and the truth itself.

That is, the difference between the "person experiencing the story" and the "person constructing the explanation."

I will put into words that "something feels off" that you all felt at the beginning.

Sources

• Paul Ekman (2003) "Emotions Revealed"

• Paul Ekman & Wallace V. Friesen (1978) "Facial Action Coding System (FACS)"

• Joe Navarro (2008) "What Every BODY Is Saying"

• Desmond Morris (1977) "Manwatching"

• Bessel van der Kolk (2014) "The Body Keeps the Score"

• Endel Tulving (1972) "Episodic and semantic memory"

• Elizabeth Loftus & John C. Palmer (1974) "Reconstruction of automobile destruction: An example of the interaction between language and memory"

• Daniel Langleben et al. (2002) "Brain activity during simulated deception: An event-related fMRI study"

• Joshua D. Greene et al. (2001) "An fMRI investigation of emotional engagement in moral judgment"

• Antoine Bechara et al. (1997) "Deciding advantageously before knowing the advantageous strategy"

In conclusion

Thank you for reading this far!
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• behavioral psychology

• reading gestures

• interpersonal relationships

• communication

or similar topics,

if there is anyone who feels this way, please consider consulting me via email as well.

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Magazine

These are the magazines I have participated in!
I am truly grateful, and I look forward to this connection in the future! 🙇

Also, this article of mine was featured, so please take a look and read it 🙇

Here are some others!

The "I remember..." series is a five-part work, so if you'd like, I think it's easier to understand if you read it from the beginning.

I also recommend this one!

Please check this out too!

For those who want to learn more, deepen their understanding of reading gestures, and study diagrams and case-by-case responses, please see the paid articles 👇

※Recommended for those who want to correctly understand gestures, reduce misunderstandings, and engage in dialogue that utilizes "hospitality" and "sincerity".

Also, everyone, please take care of your health and bodies.

Well then, see you later!!!