Comparing yourself to others. "I have no value," is that really true?

"That person is amazing."

I open social media.

I see my friends' successes.

I hear about a child's grades.

I hear stories of someone achieving their dreams.

And then,

"I haven't achieved anything."

Sometimes I end up feeling that way.

But,

at that moment,

I ask myself.

"Is that really true?"

Is the reason you are suffering at that moment,

truly because you "compared yourself to others"?

What makes you suffer is not the act of comparing

Everyone is a creature that,

ends up comparing themselves to someone else.

That in itself,

is not a bad thing.

What is truly making your heart suffer is

After comparing yourself,

it is a conclusion you reach unconsciously.

"That's why I have no value."

"I am worthless."

But,

that is not a fact,

but perhaps it is a "conclusion"

that you yourself reached after observing the event.

When was that conclusion born?

In childhood.

When you got a good grade on a test.

When you were praised by your parents.

When you were evaluated at work.

We,

learn little by little.

"If I work hard, I will be recognized."

Of course,

effort is a wonderful thing.

But,

before you know it,

That experience

can sometimes turn into this kind of assumption.

"Value is determined by results."

"Is that really true?"

At this point,

please stop and pause for a moment.

"Value is determined by results."

Is that really true?

A newborn baby.

They cannot do anything.

But,

"They have no value."

there is surely almost no one

who would think that.

Someone who has aged,

and whose body no longer moves as they wish.

Someone born with a disability.

Looking at those people,

"They have no value."

would you think that?

What if,

you don't actually think that?

Why is it that only you,

feel that you have no value unless you work hard?

Perhaps,

value,

is not something that needs to be proven by someone else,

but something that was there all along.

I used to think that way too.

I also used to,

"I have to work harder."

"I have to achieve more results."

"Other people are doing things properly."

I used to think like that.

But,

"Is that really true?"

Ever since I started asking myself that,

the scenery I see has changed little by little.

Value,

was not something determined by comparing myself to others.

It was something that was

more quiet,

and more natural.

The world doesn't change. But the way you see it does.

I,

do not think,

"Let's try not to compare ourselves to others."

It's okay to compare yourself.

At those times,

you just need to ask yourself gently.

"Is that really true?"

With just that question,

the world begins to change little by little.

Even if people don't change,

even if events don't change,

just by changing how you see things,

your heart can become surprisingly light.

Today's small exercise

Recently,

"I have no value."

Try writing down the events that made you feel that way.

And then,

try writing just one phrase next to it.

"Is that really true?"

What if,

you didn't have that belief?

What,

would you say to yourself?

Within that answer,

the real you,

might be waiting quietly.

Conclusion

Perhaps,

what was painful,

was not comparing yourself to others,

but the fact that you believed,

"I have no value."

And,

that belief too,

was not meant to cause you pain,

What you have believed in

"how things should be"

may have come to you quietly,

to help you realize it.

Even if the world doesn't change,

the way you see the world will change.

When your perspective changes,

your heart becomes a little freer.

Today, I too,

ask myself again.

"Is that really true?"

If today,

your heart was moved even a little,

why don't you,

ask yourself the same question?

🌿 Recommended reading

📖 "Is that really true?" expanded my world.

📖 Letting go of "how things should be" made the world more interesting.

📖 The story of how I, who was bad at studying, played with the world.

📖 Life is more interesting on the journey than at the destination.

🌿 For those who want to cherish the time to reconcile with themselves

"I find myself comparing myself to others."

"I'm trying my best, but it's painful."

Deep within those feelings,

there may be hidden

"how things should be"

knots in your heart that you haven't even noticed yourself.

For those people,

"Returning to a self that doesn't compare: 12 doors to untie the knots in your heart"

is available for free.

Also,

"It's hard to sort things out on my own."

when you feel that way,

in a 90-minute phone session,

we can work together to untie those knots in your heart.

There is no need to rush.

The answer,

is not outside,

it is within you.

Also,

somewhere in the world, together,

"Is that really true?"

I look forward to the day we can ask each other that🌿

#DontCompareYourself
#SelfAcceptance
#SelfEsteem
#WayOfLife
#Essay
#LightenYourHeart
#YourTrueSelf
#PlayWithTheWorld
#HowThingsShouldBe
#note