Why is being angry so scary?

--What have we lost by letting go of "anger"?

This note is the Philosophy Essay Starting from Anger series third installment. It is fine to start reading from this work.

Vol.1 Why only humans are sold cheap in an era of "cheap and convenient"
Vol.2 The day the "atmosphere" killed democracy
Vol.3 Why is it so scary to get angry?
Vol.4 Who is the phrase "if you work hard, you will be rewarded" for?
Vol.5 Who does that light illuminate, and who does it make invisible?
Vol.6 Was I laughing at someone else's anger?
Vol.7 Are you protecting something by discarding your emotions?
Vol.8 Why are we tormented by being "normal"?
Vol.9 To avoid being complicit in silence - How to live without letting go of anger

Introduction: Anger is not a weakness

You must not get angry.
People who get angry are scary, annoying, and childish.

Such an atmosphere is firmly rooted in Japanese society.
If you show anger, you are criticized; if you stay silent, you are praised for being "an adult."

However, I want to ask again.
Is being angry really such a bad thing?

Anger is, by nature, a very human emotion.
The heart reacts to injustice, to unreasonableness, and to someone else's pain.
That is what anger is, and it is also a sincere testament to one's feelings.

And yet, why are we so afraid of anger?

I want to start this essay with that question.

Chapter 1: The atmosphere that says 'it's smarter not to get angry'

In Japan, from a young age, 'reading the room' has been considered a virtue.
'Being the same as everyone else' is the correct answer, and 'voicing a dissenting opinion' is seen as an annoying act.

Raised in such an atmosphere, we have come to believe that 'not getting angry' is a sign of intelligence and a mature attitude.
Therefore, we develop a habit of pretending not to notice our own anger, suppressing our discomfort, and settling for 'well, it's fine.'

Repeating that cycle fosters social imbalance.

Essentially, not getting angry when you should is also letting go of what is right.
Anger sometimes has the power to change a situation.

That is precisely why the 'atmosphere of mocking those who get angry' is convenient for those who do not want change.
It is an atmosphere designed to keep people from speaking up and to ignore problems.

Chapter 2: Why are people who get angry treated as 'troublesome'?

When someone shows anger, they are immediately labeled as "emotional," "scary," or "self-centered."
They are attacked on social media and shunned in real-life settings.

But is that really the problem of the “angry person”?

In many cases, there is seriousness behind anger.
There is a sensitivity that empathizes with someone's pain and an integrity that cannot overlook injustice.
Nevertheless, by dismissing it as "troublesome," we begin to pretend we don't even have our own feelings.”
In this way, a society is created where angry people are isolated, and those who do not get angry are considered 'well-adjusted'.

Is that really a healthy society?
Are we mistaking the suppression of emotions for kindness?

Chapter 3: How to Regain the Power to Express Anger

Anger is not a binary choice between exploding or suppressing it.
What lies between them—that is "assertion."

Assertion is a way to convey your thoughts and anger sincerely, frankly, and calmly, without attacking the other person, yet without suppressing yourself.

In Japanese society, a "culture of reading between the lines" is deeply rooted.
That in itself is not a bad thing. A culture of empathy and consideration is also a strength of the Japanese people.

However, if we rely too much on the ability to read between the lines, words become unnecessary.
If words become unnecessary, the "power to communicate" is lost.

That is precisely why we should possess both the "ability to read between the lines" and the "power to communicate."
As a means to that end, there are ways to "get angry wisely," such as assertion.

As long as you don't get the method of delivery wrong, anger can become the beginning of dialogue, not conflict.

Conclusion: To get angry so as not to abandon the question

Expressing anger is not a sign of weakness.
It is the strength to trust the feeling that something is wrong.

Getting angry is nothing less than holding onto a question.
It is the power to keep asking yourself and society, "Is this really okay?"

We may have thought we became "smarter" by killing our emotions, but we might have lost sight of what is truly important.

But it is not too late to start now.
Let us relearn how to express anger honestly and carefully.
That first step will surely change society little by little.

★☆★ Thank you for reading until the end.
★☆★ If you resonated with this, please click the "Like" button.

And I want you to speak your questions in your own words.
I believe that those small questions will become the spark that changes society.