[Note Over-Analysis Vol. 1] 'The Story of Turning Down a 40 Million Yen Annual Salary Offer' | BR🌍Overseas YouTube Expert
It has finally begun! A new series!!
This is a project where I over-analyze articles written by our membership members.
If you're wondering what 'over-analysis' is, please take a look at the article below.
In any case, I will be having fun analyzing the articles of Note creators who have placed an order.
This time, it's BR🌍Overseas YouTube Expert!!
The article I will be analyzing this time is here.
For now, here is my first reaction the moment I saw it...
Whoa, something amazing came right away!
I will go into detail later, but it has an impact just from the title, doesn't it?
And then, I read it. My second reaction at that moment was...
Wow, this is perfect for the first installment! Thank you so much!
With that said, I feel like I can dive into this over-analysis with high spirits. Thank you, BR.
Speaking of BR, they recently won a Jury Prize at the Paid Note Grand Prix hosted by Sanrenkyu and Bunji Yamakado.
Congratulations!
The article that won the Jury Prize is right here.
At first glance... wow, 29,800 yen! But...
It won a Jury Prize at this price point. That's amazing.
I'll give it a read. Hmm, I see. But if you can reach 10 million views on an overseas YouTube channel... could it be... it has the power to draw you in.
What I found very sincere about this article is that it states in the free section that you need a tough mentality.
In other words, it's saying, "Don't do this with a half-hearted attitude." This is not something that can be said easily.
I think this shows sincerity. It draws a line between itself and the typical (omitted below) paid articles (lol).
Setting aside the (omitted below) part, the words "you need a tough mentality" and "don't do this with a half-hearted attitude" land squarely on me, lion, who has just started a mysterious membership.
Don't do this with a half-hearted attitude... Have you really thought about what it means to receive money from people...? As if to confront lion with that, the very first order for over-analysis came from BR... and then,
What is the title of that article...?
"The Story of Turning Down a 40 Million Yen Annual Salary Offer"
It's a title more than sufficient to give a wake-up call to lion, who is acting cocky despite being a coward 😂 (lol).
Introduction (Opening)
The opening should "strike in three lines".
I am using this as a reference.
The first three lines are undoubtedly important.
However, when it comes to Note, I don't think you need to be too strict about sticking to exactly three lines.
Presumably, Mr. Kondo's book also says "strike in three lines" to metaphorically express that "the opening is important," and I don't think it means that two or four lines are bad.
In any case, the fact that "the beginning is absolutely important" is something that cannot be ignored. Therefore, I have no choice but to analyze it.
By the way, I used to think this book by Mr. Kondo was so elusive, but while doing about 70,000 characters of over-analysis on Monoka Kingdom, I feel like I've started to see what it was all about, almost as if by trial and error (or so I feel). So, in future articles, topics might come up like, "Oh, this might be what was written around here in 'Shoot in Three Lines'!"
But I digress.
Let's look at the beginning of this article. I will number them for convenience.
① "Hello. Do you have a moment?"
② I received a call on my mobile phone from a man I didn't know.
③ That was 14 years ago, around the beginning of winter when the wind was getting cold.
④ It was when I had quit my job as a salaryman, rented an office by myself, and was thinking, "Alright, let's do this."
As expected, the beginning is packed with meticulous attention to detail (laughs).
What do you think when you see this beginning?
In this regard, if you think about what order you would be required to write in when writing a standard textbook example for a Japanese class, I think you would probably do it like this.
③ That was 14 years ago, around the beginning of winter when the wind was getting cold.
④ It was when I had quit my job as a salaryman, rented an office by myself, and was thinking, "Alright, let's do this."
② I received a call on my mobile phone from a man I didn't know.
① "Hello. Do you have a moment?"
If it were a so-called "normal" piece of writing, I think this ③ would come first.In terms of 5W1H, "when" should come first,right?
So, I think having ③ first is the most orthodox way for a "normal" piece of writing.
However, this piece of writing
① "Hello. Do you have a moment?"
was brought to the first sentence. This attention to detail. It gives me chills (laughs).
Oh, is my point of view too geeky right from the start...? ...Sorry.
The effect of bringing this ① to the beginning. Actually,starting with a conversationis a technique often used by Note creators who publish project articles on Note.The impact of starting with quotation marks.
But it's not just that.It's written in bold.And in this text, bold meansconversational text is bold. The effect of bringing this to the beginning.
Then, you start to wonder, why did they make it bold? Perhaps it's a consideration to make it easier to understand which parts are conversational.
But this deliberate attention to bringing① "Hello. Do you have a moment?"to the beginning, and the effect of making it bold.
Personally, the reason I thought setting up the first sentence this way was super effective is...
simply because there is a title.
Yes, the title is
The Story of Turning Down a 40 Million Yen Annual Salary Offer
after all. Earlier, I was distracted by "half-hearted feelings..." and let it slide, but this title is super intense. And, above all, this titlehas the punchline written at the title stage.
This "the punchline is written in the title" pattern. Actually, while I think it's a super powerful technique, I also think it has its difficulties... As for digging deeper into this...
I've decided to write about it in the membership-only article I'm releasing tomorrow (laughs)
Here, let's focus on the title itself. In other words, when the reader reads just the title, "
The Story of Turning Down a 40 Million Yen Salary Offer", what kind of text do they imagine will follow?
Simply put, it's "there must have been a 40 million yen salary offer".
Yes, that's why the first sentence is so effective.
1. "Hello. Do you have a moment?" is the very first word of the offer in this text.
In short, this text. To summarize,
it's "hitting them in one line" by combining it with the title
(laughs)
So, following the 5W1H textbook theory, you don't need to put ③ at the beginning.
Man, that's thrilling. I thought it was a wonderful opening.
It's gotten long, but a little more of the opening
"It's a scout offer, right? Which company is it from?"
If you know, then we can get straight to the point, it was a story about a certain president in Tokyo wanting to meet me.
"We will cover your travel expenses. We'll set up a dinner, so could you come to Tokyo?" At this point, I had already rented an office and had just started a one-person business, albeit a small one. I was already fully prepared to turn it down in my heart, but I decided to listen to what they had to say just in case.
The bold text here is also dialogue. Look, the title is "The Story of Turning Down a 40 Million Yen Salary Offer" (laughs). When you do that, you suddenly get curious about how they turned it down, right? At first, it's "
fully prepared to turn it down in my heart".
This is the start. But if it were just "a story about being fully prepared to turn it down and then just turning it down," it wouldn't be interesting at all (laughs).
So how will it unfold and be handled? That's how I raise my expectations and keep reading.
Middle part ①
"To get straight to the point, I'm thinking of launching a new business, and I'd like you to be in charge of it. I'm still thinking about the compensation, but what do you think?"
They showed me a business plan written in Excel with sales forecasts for the next three years, selling, general and administrative expenses, and my salary. And my eyes went wide.
"Fixed salary of 1 million yen + commission" start
At first, I misread it as an annual salary of 1 million yen (lol). What kind of exploitative company is that?
Wait, no, you rascal, it's a monthly salary of 1 million yen... gulp...
An annual salary of 12 million yen guaranteed even with zero performance...
If I were to give my impression at this point, it would be: BR is such an incredibly talented person... It's shown in concrete numbers (lol).
I mean, this was right after they had just gone independent. Of course you'd be hesitant. You've just started, so you don't know how things will turn out...
And then comes this part.
'Well then, why don't you come take a look at the company for now?'
With that, they were guided to the Shinjuku office.
This president is clever (lol). It's this timing.
Going to see the company is, an act with no downsides as long as you have the timeafter all. Well, you're going to go. And then, next.
Making someone imagine a concrete picture is a very effective method.
After seeing the office, they said they would also provide a place to live, so they went to view a high-rise apartment in Shinjuku.
It's a small detail, but I love how the sentence 'Making someone imagine a concrete picture is a very effective method.' is embedded like a pillar in this scene. Even if you're skimming, this sentence will catch your eye. And even if you're skimming, you'll notice it. Even while skimming, you can tell, 'Oh, they're being presented with an attractive offer here.'
'If you like this one, we'll rent it immediately.'
Wavering. I could clearly feel the wavering in my own heart.
Pressing the advantage. It's brilliant.
Yes, it's not just the 40 million yen annual salary. That's the appeal of this offer.
And then,
'Wavering'
Oh, here it comes. These three characters are effective. They are effective precisely because they are three characters. My emotions were moved. The timing is also perfect.
The reader is now drawn in, wondering, 'What's going to happen? What's going to happen?'
Oh, over-analysis is fun (lol).
Mid-section ②
And two days after returning to Osaka.
I called the president.
"I've thought about it, and I'd like to decline.
I've just started on my own, even if it's small, and I have a desire to give it my best.
Besides, I believe I'll be able to earn 1 million yen on my own before long."
"I see... I understand.
By the way, I'm going to Osaka for work next week, could we grab a meal somewhere?"
This president is smooth (second time). It's this timing, right after being turned down.
Going out for a meal is,an act with zero downsides as long as you have the timeafter all (laughs). Well, I'm going. And next.
The day of.
The president showed up alone; he really hadn't brought any headhunters along.
"Alright, let's go!"
Two men in a small private room.
Sitting side-by-side grilling meat felt awkward at first, and I wondered what to do.
However, since we were only one year apart in age and had similar personal attributes, we hit it off and became friends immediately.
I even felt like I had gained a really good-natured older brother.
This is his charm (laughs).
This is also interesting when viewed from the hidden theme of "how to persuade attractive talent you really want with an offer".
"I even felt like I had gained a really good-natured older brother." It's amazing that he makes you feel this way just by going out to eat.
The fact that he "didn't bring a headhunter" is also important for the hidden theme, isn't it? If pushing doesn't work, try pulling.
"Do you know any good hostess clubs around here?"
The president intended to go to a second place.
(Omitted)
"Hey! Osaka hostess clubs are amazing! They're so lively!"
"No, it's just the season, haha."
Saying things like that, we stood in line together in the cold air, hunched over.
(Omitted)
"Let's go back to the first place!!"
We returned to the first hostess club, and while laughing with our arms around each other,
"We're back for round two! Hello!"
we were even acting like annoying customers.
I only go to hostess clubs for social obligations (preemptive defense), but charming presidents really seem to have fun at hostess clubs.
It's not that they are seriously obsessed or hooked on hostess clubs.
As for whether they like hostess clubs, well, some might, but it's not necessarily the case, yet they really seem to be having a good time.
Rather than enjoying the hostess club, they are enjoying the "hostess club visit with you".
And, they are exquisitely playful. They'd rather be called cute than cool (Wait? Is this okay? Haha. No, really, I only go for social obligations, haha).
That comes out here.
After being completely satisfied, the president said he couldn't walk anymore and would take a taxi to the hotel.
"No, President, the hotel is 100 meters away... you can see it right there!
Besides, if we take one here, Midosuji is one-way, so we'll go in the opposite direction."
"It's fine if we go the opposite way!
It's fine if it takes an hour!
I'm taking a taxi!"
he said, and that day, the dead-drunk president disappeared.
If you look at this calmly, it's just a nuisance (laughs).
But it looks playful. You almost forget about the headhunting at the beginning, don't you?
Or rather, I think the dead-drunk president has already forgotten.
But it's exquisitely like, "I can't even get back to the hotel without you"... wait? "I need you"... could it be, by any chance, he's still aiming for me... and he disappears with the drunkenness.
Ah, exquisite. This staging that doesn't look like staging.
Perhaps BR is also a very personable person. In a situation like this, you wouldn't think, "Ah, don't make me stay out late, don't mess around." The president also knew that BR was that kind of person, which is why he could take this action.
This is the "way of carrying things." No, it might be the "president's way of carrying things" rather than the writing (laughs), but I think you couldn't write it like this without the ability that BR has to express it in text.
Now, we head toward the climax. What on earth will happen??
Mid-section ③
And a few days later, I heard from the president again.
“Hello! We really had a great time the other day! Thank you. I’ve carefully recalculated the numbers regarding the terms. If this doesn’t work, I’ll give up completely. So, could you take one last look at this?”
…Are you sane?
I felt my heart pounding and my face getting hot.
“3 million yen monthly salary + performance-based bonus.” I guarantee an annual income of 40 million yen for the first year.
This development! This development!
First, the president’s final persuasion.
After getting so comfortable in Osaka at the cabaret club, and even though the headhunting talk was forgotten, he left behind the message that he needs you—and then this line.
It is the culmination of the underlying theme: “How to persuade an attractive candidate you absolutely want with an offer”.
And then,
“...Are you sane?”
BR is incredibly skilled at using three-character phrases. At the perfect moment, he uses three characters to maximize the impact of the sentence.
And here it is. Finally, it has appeared.
“40 million”—that powerful word.
The flow of this development is as follows.
Revealing the punchline in the title
→ The offer begins from the very first sentence
→ Mid-section, “wavering”
→ The ultimate persuasion that fully depicts the underlying theme: “How to persuade an attractive candidate you absolutely want with an offer”
→ ...Are you sane?
→ And the “40 million” brought out at the peak
That is the progression. It’s brilliant.
Yes. And this story. What kind of story was it again? Right, the punchline was already written in the title. “The Story of Turning Down a 40 Million Yen Annual Salary Offer”!
Yes. After bringing it this far... he turned it down!
BR!! How did you turn it down!!!
From that point, we head toward the finale!
How to end it
After consulting with my parents back home
My father said,
"That's amazing. But do as you like."
I've been told this"Do as you like!"theory often since I was a child.
It may seem like he's pushing me away, but in reality, it's about making my own decisions.
I am grateful for this method of making me think for myself.
Your father is so cool! It's like, like father, like son.
"I am grateful for this method of making me think for myself.". This is also a famous quote. Inserting this scene shows that BR did not just turn it down recklessly without thinking.
And then... finally!
Come on, how did you turn it down!! (laughs)
"Thank you again for the offer.
Once the fire has been lit inside me and I've started running, I want to follow this path.
If I had received the offer before I resigned, I think I would have gone to work for the president.
I was that drawn to the president as a person.
...I'm sorry. I might fail, but I'll try my best on my own!"
Here it comes!
Earlier, I said the hidden theme was "How to persuade highly attractive talent you really want with an offer", so what is the main theme then?
It is the payoff of the title's punchline.
In other words, the main theme is "Why did you turn down a 40 million yen salary offer?".
You led up to it so brilliantly, and then you turned it down right here. Clearly.
The reason is,
"Once the fire has been lit inside me and I've started running, I want to follow this path."
So cool...
This is a personal matter, but I couldn't help but think of myself, lion, having just started my membership. I wrote earlier, "Don't do it with a half-hearted attitude," and I feel like this text is overflowing with BR's basic mindset as well.
I think it's just my own one-sided misunderstanding, but I feel like I've been cheered on.
That is
Easy choices, Hard life.
Hard choices, Easy life.
I feel like this is also succinctly expressed in those words.
And now, to the finale.
I feel that if I had taken that 40 million yen back then, that would surely have been my peak.
I would have been satisfied with that and would never have grown any further.
The fact that I can live abroad now without worrying about money is undoubtedly thanks to the fact that I have repeatedly made hard choices.
Everyone faces a series of choices every day, and we all struggle with them, don't we?
When that happens, please remember this story and try to actively choose the hard path.
Wow...
I feel like I've received the best possible encouragement. Even if I'm just imagining it.
But this is encouragement for everyone who is lost in their daily choices.
When you start something new and begin your journey, you may face various temptations and situations where you are forced to make difficult choices. However,if you make the easy choice, there will be no further growth.
I don't think starting a membership is an "easy choice." In fact, there were many things to think about, and while it was "fun," it wasn't "easy." In that sense, it's truly a small thing, but it might be a hard choice. After all, I am asking for money.
But precisely because of that, I probably wouldn't have read this text so closely, and I might not have written this over-analysis. I might not have read it so deeply that I could mistake it for encouragement directed at myself.
In that sense, I am grateful to BR for letting me read this text for the first installment.
I have read something amazing. I take my hat off to you, both technically and emotionally.
Thank you very much.
*
Ending & Next Preview
How was the first note over-analysis since the membership started? Please let me know your thoughts! I'm sure both I and BR would be happy to hear them.
Oh man, it ended up being long from the very first time (laughs).
I don't know if I can keep this up if I make it this long every time, so let's just say it's this long because it's the first time (laughs). Please keep in mind that, as a rule, I aim for at least 3,000 characters.
Even so, when in doubt, choose the hard path (laughs), and I hope you enjoy the membership as your heart desires.
And I would like to write an even deeper analysis for members!
The deep dive for membership benefits will be about:
"The pattern where the punchline is written in the title"
I would like to try to abstract and generalize the specific examples from this text so that they can be applied elsewhere!
If you are interested, please join the membership. It's already set up, so it will be published tomorrow at 17:30!
And the next over-analysis will be on this work by Miyu Amanofu!
A masterpiece that even became a featured article today. Man, the next one is going to be incredibly challenging too (laughs).
With that said, thank you for reading this far!
Even if I get too enthusiastic and it turns into a long post, "Make today the best day ever"