Multilingual Observation | Where Does “Friendship” Begin?

[Words of Relationship 2]

When talking to someone, or walking side-by-side with someone, I wonder in a fleeting moment: Is this person already a "friend"? Or are they still just an "acquaintance"? At what point does someone become a "friend"?

Even if the word "friend" is the same on the surface, the boundaries seem to differ slightly from language to language. In some languages, it takes time before you call someone that, while in others, people call each other "friends" as soon as they meet.
The word "friend" seems to reflect the way that society values maintaining distance.

Japanese: Becoming a "friend" before you know it

In Japanese, we don't really pay much attention to the moment of "becoming friends." You hang out, talk, and before you know it, you're "friends." We don't intentionally draw a clear line. Perhaps there is a sense of "security" in that ambiguity. However, because of this ambiguity, the question of "at what point does someone become a 'real friend'?" is also ambiguous.
The Japanese word for "friend" might be a term that allows for a "blurring" of relationships.

English: A chosen relationship, "friend"

The English word "friend" has slightly clearer contours.
A mere acquaintance is an "acquaintance." They are not a "friend." Only those with whom you have a relationship of trust can be called a "friend."
"Friend" implies a closeness that comes after measuring the distance.

French, Italian, Spanish: A relationship you "become" over time

In French it is "devenir ami," in Italian "diventare amico," and in Spanish "hacerse amigo."
These are all verb expressions for "to become friends." In other words, "friend" is not a state, but a process. It is something built over time.
And once you become an "ami," "amico," or "amigo," that relationship is deep and lasts a long time.

Turkish: Sense of camaraderie and sincerity

The Turkish word "arkadaş" also means "companion," "comrade," or "colleague." In other words, it is "someone you do something with," and it carries the nuance of camaraderie and a cooperative relationship. It emphasizes loyalty and sincerity rather than superficial closeness. Therefore, once you recognize someone as a "friend," you cherish them for a long time.

Indonesian: The light relationship of "teman"

The Indonesian word "teman" is a convenient term that can be used for both close and casual relationships.
It is expressed by adding nouns or adjectives that describe the place or nature of the relationship, such as "teman kerja" (work colleague) or "teman dekat" (close friend). Because of this, it has become a word that can be used casually in daily life.

"Friend" might just be the perfect distance

Looking at it this way, the word "friend" might be a record of the "perfect distance from others" born within each culture.
How close do you get, and where do you stop?
Within that sense, you can see the landscape of human relationships.

Today, I have a small question for you as well.
For you, at what point does someone become a "friend"?

※ Next time ↓

※ Previous time ↓

※ Multilingual Observation Table of Contents ↓