[Interview] Shin R25: How to Listen and Empathize / Questioning Skills
This is a record from the perspective of a fan who finds the work of TV Asahi announcer Naoyuki Hiraishi deeply impactful.✍️🤗
Focusing on several interviews, I have recorded what he thinks and how he approaches his work, along with my own super personal highlights and discoveries.↓↓↓
This time it's this!! Shin R25 is here!↓↓↓
Published July 3, 2025
Speaking of Shin R25, it is the very origin that granted me "facilitation skills," as it was the interview that sparked the publication of my book on super facilitation skills.
This time, it's about Questioning Skills and How to Listen and Empathize with Others. While the content is inseparable from facilitation, there are no other interviews that specialize in this, and the methods of questioning and listening are incredibly deeply explored and articulated. I was shocked by the high resolution and the amount of learning! It was content that made me realize that "questioning skills = more about building relationships than technique." First, here are my super personal highlights. (There may be misinterpretations, but these are my personal impressions.)
✅To expand on a single topic *The part that surprised me the most!
Ask the same thing multiple times. Depending on the person, the way of asking, the atmosphere, and the preceding context, the answer changes significantly. It is common for answers to be different even if the person says something similar, for feelings to change, or for answers to differ from what was said earlier as the topic is dug deeper. Including the fact that they don't realize they are being asked the same thing when asked in a different way also, shaking things up is a very important element. / This is packed with the reasons why Hiraishi-san's questions dig deep and why you can't dodge them!😱😱 He is a professional who uses human observation and psychology, transcending the dimension of just being "good at talking"! When the other person's answer changed, I used to think, "What was that previous story about?" but that is exactly where the true intention and the facade lie, and being able to draw that out through questions is a huge discovery that leads to a story one or two levels deeper. Regarding when the answer changes, he lists 4 points in a second:
"The person," "the way of asking," "the atmosphere," and "the preceding context". "If you ask the same thing in a different way, they don't realize they are being asked the same thing" was so shocking that I might have listened to it 100 times?🤣 And this becomes even clearer when you look at his practice on AbemaPrime. To give a concrete example, there was an impressive episode where he was firing questions at a battle-hardened politician🤣🤣 When no answer comes out (they dodge the question),
① Nail them down by saying please answer properly and ask again (No answer→) ② Rephrase and ask again (No answer→) ③ Try from a different angle (No answer→) ④ Wait a while and ask again (No answer→) ⑤ Shift from a grilling style to an empathetic style and try again (No answer☺️) It was an incredible battle. It took me many viewings to finally notice the 5-step structure, but there was a god-tier episode in terms of "questioning skills" that I want to name. If I were the one answering, I would likely have revealed my true feelings or the truth without realizing it was the same question by step ② or ③, and if they waited or showed empathy like in ④ or ⑤, I would have talked long ago. It is necessary to add that this is the version for politicians who dodge unfavorable questions, but I was truly surprised and made a huge discovery in the way he stepped through it, pushing and pulling, trying to draw out the story no matter what. And what is important is! Even if they dodged it after these 5 steps, I don't think he "lost," but rather that "the viewers also understood that they were not answering." Hiraishi-san's questioning skills, terrifying!😱😱
✅Deepening & Shifting Sideways
Questioning skills are not a one-shot deal; once you ask one thing, you think about the second and third arrows based on that. It can be in the form of deepening or shifting sideways. For example, if I answered about questioning skills, if asked, "It's like this on AbemaPrime, but how is it on Good Morning?" I would think they shifted sideways. If they came with, "How is it when it's 1-on-1 on AbemaPrime?" that would be deepening. / Actually, this is the same part as "To expand on a single topic," but he breaks down the content of the second and third arrows. It is content that connects to "90% is preparation, but once you enter, you discard it and listen to the other person, and what is being said now becomes the starting point," and it is very helpful that he separates the ways of deepening into "deepening" and "shifting sideways."
✅Judgment axis for applying the brakes
If it's a bit hostile but a deep conversation and the content is fulfilling, I want to do my best until the very limit without breaking off. If it's hostile but the discussion is low-precision and lacks substance, I should just stop it quickly. He judges that limit even on AbemaPrime. There are cases where it's somewhat tense but that's natural if you're speaking your true feelings, and if the way of speaking is bad, I might step in, rephrase the words, and deepen the discussion further. Whether the relationship is hostile and whether the content is fulfilling are separate axes. Whether the purpose is achieved is more important than whether the relationship is good or bad. / There is a phrase that might be my #1 favorite and most impactful Hiraishi-san quote:
"Is it in line with the purpose?". I think this is an example where the resolution of that point explodes. And at this time, the interviewer asked, "How do you apply the brakes when things are hostile?" He answered with things like a word to say when intervening, but by adding the supplement that the substance of the content is more important than the atmosphere of the place, he teaches us what is most important. Before getting into the details, sharing and aligning the premise with the other person (the interviewer) and the people watching (the viewers), setting the premise of the question itself, this way of answering is Hiraishi-san's true essence and is so helpful. (Vocabulary...)
✅Playing a role
You have mentioned the phrase 'playing a role' in both your books and interviews, but until I heard this interview, my understanding was limited to 'playing the role of a facilitator.' However, this is not limited to just program hosts or meeting moderators; it applies to everything. 'You are already playing a role when you are with someone,' 'whether you are at work or with family,' 'turning yourself off temporarily to match the state where the other person feels comfortable', and I feel like I finally truly understood the real meaning of these words. If I were to take just 'playing a role' in isolation, it could be interpreted negatively as not being your true self or hiding your real intentions. → I understood it as 'professional behavior' through the phrase 'playing the role of a facilitator' → ③ To make the other person feel comfortable, and for the benefit of everyone more,, you temporarily turn yourself off. This was a real eye-opener for me, and although I hadn't been able to put it into words, I felt that it was something I had sensed myself when it was pointed out. You described being alone as a 'switched-off state,' and when with others, 'the subject is the other person. You empathize with the other person's thoughts for a comfortable relationship.' I am very grateful that you put this into words.
✅Going to the same side and empathizing
One of the biggest obstacles in communication is whether or not you are on the same side. The moment you become 'us' and 'them,' the other person closes their heart.If they think you are a person from the 'other side,' they lose the desire to answer, thinking, 'You wouldn't understand, would you? You're on the other side.' It is very important to listen with empathy so that you don't end up in an 'us' and 'them' relationship. You smooth out the unevenness in the relationship, look for common ground while acknowledging the differences, go to the same side, and create a state where you can say, 'We can understand each other on this topic,' and align the conversation. / 'Us and them'... This was shocking when I first heard it, and it is a point that made me realize it
might be the essence of human relationships. It was the moment when the word 'empathize,' which Mr. Hiraishi often uses, was super-verbalized, and I wanted to be conscious of it precisely because it is a structure that one tends to fall into unintentionally at any given moment.
Details *This conversation took place as of July 2025
▷ Miho Yonekubo (Shin R25 Editorial Department)
▶︎ Naoyuki Hiraishi (TV Asahi Announcer)
1. What is a good question?
The listener's purpose is clear, and an answer that aligns with it is returned. It's not just one turn, but a conversation; simply put, it's interview technique. The passing grade is being able to properly ask what you want to ask and having the other person properly say what they want to say. If you aim for great success, it's when the person being asked says 'thank you' because they were able to verbalize something they were vaguely thinking about, or realized something for the first time. And it is the ultimate questioning power to have them feel they were able to say it all, or that you summarized it for them, and this is what I originally want to aim for. That was exactly the first Shin R25 interview, where Mr. Amano made me realize that 'what I have been doing is facilitation.'
2. Tips for improving questioning power
Aligning what the other person wants to say with what you want to askis everything. There are many cases where there is a gap. The other person often has something they absolutely want to say, so let them say it first. If they feel they have been able to say it all, they can also answer your questions. It is important not to leave them in a state where they cannot say what they most want to say.
3. Approach to people with whom you have a shallow relationship
If the purpose is clear, it is easy to proceed in a way that aligns with it because you are facing the same direction, but if not, the conversation won't last unless you talk about the weather or something similar. And there are people who like that kind of conversation and people who don't. Some people prefer to be silent rather than make small talk, so you need to assess that. If you want to maintain a good relationship, you have no choice but to empathize. Match your tone of voice, posture, and speed—match everything. If it goes well, your brains will connect, and you will understand each other. Once you understand each other, they will open up more and more. In response to that, you also engage in self-disclosure to gain the other person's trust. It is better to think that the subject is the other person. The stance of responding to what the other person is seeking is the easiest technique to match them.
4. How to expand on a single topic
Ask the same thing multiple times. Depending on the person, how you ask, the atmosphere, and the preceding context, the answer will change significantly. Even if they are saying similar things, it is common for the content to be different, for their feelings to change, or for the content to change from what they answered earlier as you dig deeper. Including the fact that they don't realize they are being asked the same thing if you ask the same thing in a different way, shaking things up is a very important element. Therefore, think of questions not as one turn, but as a block of a second or third arrow. Unlike AI, it is difficult for humans to switch if they are asked about a different topic. Once you ask one thing, take that and shoot a second or third arrow regarding what you thought. It can be in the form of deepening, or it can be in the form of shiftingsideways. For example, if they answer about questioning power, and you are asked, 'It's like this on AbemaPrime, but how is it on Good Morning?', you think they have shifted sideways. If they ask, 'How is it on AbemaPrime when it's one-on-one?', then they have deepened it. It is very easy to answer if you dig deeper while shaking things up. Keep the state where your minds are connected for a long time and ask in blocks. By asking one question, it deepens like pulling a potato vine. It feels like digging for potatoes together. Human relationships have ups and downs; if you are in the same workplace, you can understand by saying 'please take care of that,' but you don't know about each other's private lives. If you are not in the same workplace, or even if you are in the same workplace but in different departments, conversation won't be established. If you value the time when conversations between completely different people click, you will realize you can't understand each other. You don't need to understand everything, but I think the trick to connecting hearts is to dig deeper into that theme by asking, 'In short, what does that mean?'
5. How to match the other person
Do not keep asking one after another. Even if you are in the position of the listener and the speaker in an interview, react to what they have answered and accept it. It is tough if one person is talking the whole time. The current state is for distribution/broadcasting, so I am at about 1.3 times the tension of a meeting. I do this because I have been conditioned to think that no one will watch otherwise, but when that is not the case, match the tension that is comfortable for the other person. If you want to have comfortable communication, the thought of dedicating yourself to the other person rather than yourself is stronger.
6. How to apply the brakes (Group talk)
If you are a facilitator, you should take over. The quickest way to extinguish a fire is to direct the conversation to someone who isn't arguing, organize the points, or change the theme entirely. However, there are two axes to a hostile atmosphere.Whether the relationship is hostile and whether the content is substantial are separate axes. If it's slightly hostile but the discussion is deep and very substantial, I want to keep it going as long as possible. If the discussion is inaccurate and lacks substance despite the hostility, I should stop it quickly. I also gauge this fine line on AbemaPrime. Sometimes the relationship is a bit tense, but they are having a deep, good conversation. In those cases, I want to keep it going to the limit and reach the deep parts. I stop it when it's truly about to break down. That judgment is very important.It's not about whether the relationship is good or bad, but whether the goal is being achieved.Sometimes things get a bit tense, but that's natural when people are being honest. If the way they are saying it is bad, I might step in, rephrase their words, and deepen the discussion further.
7. Playing a role
I play a role at work. My mode is higher than in meetings because it's for work, and it's a switch I turn on because of my desire to be understood. Butwhen I'm with someone, I'm already acting. Whether it's a work meeting, at the office, or with family, I think I'm always playing a role. I want the other person to feel comfortable. That's why it's tiring. Only when I'm completely alone is the switch turned off. There is no doubt that the switch is on strongest during a live broadcast, but I think I'm playing a role even with colleagues, between performers, during meetings, when I'm at the office not in a meeting, in the staff room, or in the announcing department. After all, there are things you don't do when you're at work, right? You wouldn't just lie down, would you lol. I think that's just how it is for people to be comfortable with each other. If you want to communicate with someone,you should adjust to the state where the other person is comfortable and turn yourself off for a moment.If you are adjusting to the other person, you don't have to worry about how you look, so you don't get nervous. I specialize in creating a place where the other person can comfortably hit a home run. When I'm with people, I feel like I'm dedicating myself to them and playing a role.I put aside what I want to do and first make sure the other person is comfortable, finds it easy to talk, and finds it easy to work. After that, there is a turn where I can ask what I want to ask.
8. Tips for improving questioning skills that you can use from tomorrow
First, capture what the other person wants to say as accurately as possible and have them talk comfortably. After that, ask what you want to ask. This order is the secret to a good relationship. Human relationships have bumps. One of the major factors that hinders communication iswhether you are on the same side. The moment you become 'us' and 'them,' the other person closes their heart. If they think you are on the other side, they lose the desire to answer, thinking, 'You wouldn't understand, you're on the other side,' so you need to create a state where you can talk while being on the same side.It is very important to listen while being considerate so that you don't end up in an 'us' vs 'them' relationship.Smooth out the bumpy relationship, find common ground while acknowledging the differences, get on the same side, and create a state where you can align the conversation so that you can say, 'We understand each other on this topic.'
9. Worries about how to listen / Summary
I continue to worry about whether the other person was able to say things properly and whether I am delivering that properly to the viewers, but I don't have worries about myself. It's fine if it's an AI, but it's not just about me being okay. Even with AI, in the coming era, it depends on the questions. Questioning skills are a very important skill because the answer changes depending on the question. Even more so with people,you can immediately tell how much that person understands, how much they understand the story so far, and whether they are hitting the core or missing the point, so questioning skills are scary. Among business skills, it reveals a lot about the person.Especially the second question, the second arrow. You can tell how much they understand and what direction they are trying to go in, so it's profound. When I try to do a proper interview, I make a list of questions and group them. From there, I create the ultimate first question to ask. My thoughts and purpose are embedded in this one question. The way I listen changes between today and tomorrow. The sense of the era and timing appear in the questions. The way of listening, the tone, the order of asking...The first questionis important, as isthe first question within a block, andhow you set up the blocks, which reveals your awareness of the issues and how much understanding you have in the background. Communication can just be a fun back-and-forth, but if you have a purpose, you can take a shortcut through questions. For example, suppose your smartphone breaks. If you ask 2 or 3 questions that hit the core when you take it in for repair, you will immediately know what to do. Whether it can be repaired or not, whether you can solve it by talking to that person or if you need to talk to someone higher up, how the warranty works—if you break it down, the answer comes out quickly.You should think of the pattern of using questions to take a shortcut to the goal as separate from questions and conversations that enjoy communication. There is no need to grill someone or act superior;if you can ask questions that hit the core, things will move forward all at once.
10. (My thoughts)
Even though the theme was questioning skills, it was an interview where I felt the attitude of understanding the other person throughout. The skills are amazing, but the premise and passion to demonstrate them are also strong! Like facilitation, I thought it was a combination of the things I've felt so far and the accumulation of experiences that didn't go well + the power of listening.
Also, one of the things I like about Mr. Hiraishi's way of speaking is'how he organizes,' 'how he separates,' and 'boundaries'. It's the moment when things that can only be understood vaguely are organized logically and neatly. It feels too good 🤣🤣 I want to be like that too, and I watch it many times because I really want to know how he organizes his thoughts so well and how he can explain the organized content in an easy-to-understand way. I'm leaving this as a learning record because I thought that just a fan comment is the same as saying nothing and doesn't have much meaning.
Please watch the video!