[Read in 2 minutes] Why people who struggle to rest want to fill their holidays with plans

- Why do we feel anxious during "time spent doing nothing"?

It's about white space💫

Today, I'd like to write about
"feeling anxious when I have time where I'm doing nothing"🌿

Even though it's a day off, for some reason, I want to make plans.

On days when I do laundry, go shopping, tidy up the room a bit, and even get ready for tomorrow, I feel relieved.

Conversely,
when a day ends without me doing anything,

"Wait, what did I do today...?"

I start to feel a bit uneasy.

I don't think I'm the only one who feels this way🥲

Writer of this article: Yohaku-chan
I share information about working while dealing with the waves of anxiety disorder and bipolar disorder. I write articles related to mental health and articles from the perspective of someone actually experiencing these conditions.

It's natural to want to make plans

I think it's quite natural for people who struggle to rest
to want to make plans even on their days off.

Because nowadays, it's not just about work, but even on our days off,

"Did I spend it properly?"
"Did I accomplish anything?"
"Did I waste it?"

It's easy to think like that, isn't it? (lol)

*Seriously, I'm the typical example!

Even though it's actually a day off,
there's a little judge in my head,

"If you had to score today's holiday, what would it be?"

It feels like it's asking me...!!

No, please don't grade me on my day off!

I think that, but
I just can't seem to stop.

The freedom to do nothing is surprisingly difficult

I feel that in Japan, there is an atmosphere that values working hard, being useful, and doing things properly.
that is not necessarily a bad thing in itself.
But when that mindset creeps into your days off, resting becomes a bit painful.

That in itself is not a bad thing.

But when that way of thinking creeps into your days off,
resting becomes a bit painful.

For example,

A holiday where you cleaned your room, went shopping, and finished preparing for tomorrow.

A holiday where you did nothing and just zoned out.

If you were asked which one looks like a "proper day,"
it would probably be the former.

But in reality,
the latter is also a proper holiday.

A day where nothing progressed.
A day where you weren't useful to anyone.
A day that ended just by lying down.

Even so,
it might have been a day to help you recover a little.

I was evaluating myself even on my days off

I was also quite the type to want to fill my holidays with plans.

Or rather, I still am, relatively speaking. (laughs)

I want to do laundry.
I want to go shopping.
I want to tidy up my room.
If possible, I want to finish preparing for tomorrow.

Each of these things is not a bad thing.

But I can't feel at ease unless I finish everything.
If I do nothing, I feel like I'm being left behind.

This is what's painful, isn't it?

To use an analogy,
it feels like being on a moving walkway where you move backward just by standing still.

Rather than wanting to move forward,
I'm moving because I don't want to be left behind.

I feel like I used to spend my days off like that.

A day where you do nothing is not a wasted day

It's easy to think that a day where you do nothing is a "waste."

Which is annoying, right? (laughs)

But lately, I've been thinking about something a little different.

Maybe time spent doing nothing is actually time to turn down the noise inside yourself.

Things you've been thinking about for a long time. Things you've been tense about. Things you've been trying to do to meet someone else's expectations.

It's time to set those things down, little by little.

Lying on the grass. Just looking at the sky. Drinking a warm beverage. Zoning out without looking at your phone.

Even if it looks like that time isn't producing anything, I feel like it's properly helping me return to myself.

Even if productivity is zero, the value is not zero

This is the one thing I want to say most today!!

A day with zero productivity is not a day with zero value!!

A day where you couldn't do anything is still a day where you were truly living!!

You don't have to prove anything, even on your days off!!

It's okay if you weren't a version of yourself that spent the day well. It's okay if you weren't a version of yourself that was active. It's okay if you weren't a version of yourself that was useful.

It's okay to just let yourself be, exactly as you are, when you just wanted to rest.

Feeling anxious during time spent doing nothing doesn't mean you're lazy.

It's surely because you've been trying so hard to do things properly for so long.

So today, it's okay to have time where you do nothing.

Like that,
tell yourself just a little bit!🌿

# 65Days

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