What is the role of a parent? | To become an understanding supporter

Hello, I'm a happy dad🌞
Click here for my self-introduction

Now, when raising children, don't you ever think like this?

What is the role of a parent?
What should I be doing as a dad?

On the other hand,

・The time I spend with my child is fun
・But I can't explain why it's going well

I think there are many dads like that.

At times like that,

Last night, I had a discussion with my old man that lasted straight from 10 PM to 3 AM.

Sometimes as one dad to another,
Sometimes as father and child.
In other words, as one who has raised a child and one who was raised.

I am grateful that we were able to talk for such a long time.

In the midst of our discussion,

we found one point of agreement.

■ What is the role of a parent

The role of a parent is to be an "understanding person" and a "supporter."

It's simple, but
this felt the most right.

What we talked about was quite interesting, and
"Becoming a dad who is himself and happy"I think it leads to hints, so
I've organized the content of those 5 hours.

Looking back, 5 hours is an insane amount of time to have been talking. (lol)

■ A parent is not a "person who raises" but a "person who understands"

We tend to
"I have to raise them properly"
think that.

・Teaching them the right things
・Making them able to do things
・Guiding them

Of course, that is also important.
But before that,
there is something even more important.

Understanding what kind of child they are.

What do they like,
what moves their heart,
when do they laugh,
and when do they dislike something?

First of all,

get to know them.

■ And becoming a "supporter"

Once you understand them,
the next step is simple.

Support them.

・Support what they want to do
・Watch over them even when things don't go well
・Celebrate what they have achieved together

What is important here is,

not to control them.

When the parent becomes the protagonist,
the child becomes the one who is "made to do things."

However,

when the parent becomes a supporter,
the child becomes the protagonist.

This difference is significant.

■ So, how do you "understand" them?

What is needed here is,

observation.

And a hint for this is,
Montessori education.

■ The philosophy of Montessori education

In Montessori education,

the first thing to do is

not to teach, but to observe.

This is because,

children already

possess the power to grow on their own.

What adults should do is:

・Observe what they are interested in
・Find where the seeds of growth lie
・Prepare the environment without getting in the way

In other words,

to be an understanding supporter.

■ Changes that occur when you observe

For example,

when they are repeating the same play over and over.

I used to think like this:

“Aren't they bored?”
“Should I make them do something else?”
“Wouldn't it be better if they did it this way to improve?”

But when I look at it with observation as the focus,

“They are really focused on this right now.”
“This is the point of growth for this child.”

the way I see it changes.

Then,

the way I interact with them changes naturally.

Do not interfere
Watch over them
Only step in when necessary

Just by doing that,

your relationship with your child will change.

■ Things you can do to enjoy being a dad

"I don't know what I should do"

is a state of

searching for the right answer.

However,

when you become an understanding supporter,

you no longer need to search for the right answer.

Because,

the child in front of you already has the answer.

Therefore,

the act of engaging becomes enjoyable.

You are naturally enjoying being a dad.

You might feel like you aren't doing anything,

but that is definitely not the case.

For that child, there is no one else they can observe more than "you" right now.

By being watched over by you, that child can act like themselves to the fullest.

Your gaze has value🌞

■ Finally
The role of a parent isnot to drill something into them.

Understanding
Supporting

What is necessary for that is,

Observation

If right now,

you don't know how to engage,

I want you to do nothing and just observe for five minutes.

・What are they doing right now?
・What are they absorbed in?
・What kind of expression do they have?

Just by doing that,

the world you see will change.

And surely,

parenting will become a little more fun. You will find hints.

Thank you for reading this far!
For those who think this is interesting and want to enjoy posting like this,
I highly recommend this.

To those who are not good at/cannot continue posting on note

"I want to continue but I can't"

To those who have such worries.

I, who used to be a quitter,
have summarized the reason why I was able to continue 3000 squats👇

・Why you can't continue
・How to make it continue
・How anyone can build a habit

👉People who cannot continue are making this mistake at the start | Surprising discovery | 32 days of continuous squats | Happy Dad