A "Girl's" Day

My period has started.

I had been experiencing PMS (premenstrual syndrome) symptoms for about a week.

In my case,

I feel nauseous

I feel sleepy

I become sensitive to smells

I feel irritable

I have lower back pain

I crave sweets

And yet, if I eat them, I vomit

I suppose that's about it?

I had my first period at age 10.

I still remember the shame I felt, which made me hesitate to tell my parents.

Because of severe dysmenorrhea, I had been taking medium-dose birth control pills since I was 28.

Since there are many side effects, I had frequent blood tests and internal examinations.

The gynecological clinic I went to was at a university hospital, so every time I had an internal exam, I had to endure the humiliation of many young medical residents looking at my lower abdomen from behind the curtain.

At 43, I switched from medium-dose to low-dose birth control pills.

At 48, the prescription was stopped because they said, "At your age, it's likely menopause."

But I still get my period.

I am 52 now, and although it occasionally skips a month, I still have bleeding and experience PMS symptoms.

I wonder how much longer this will last.

"It probably won't be coming much longer."

Thinking that, I don't stock up on many napkins, so it's quite a hassle to have to run to the neighborhood drugstore every time my period starts.

Even though my stomach hurts and I'm exhausted, living alone means I have to do all the housework and shopping myself; no one else will do it for me.

But when I think of my mother or my former colleagues, I get the impression that there are many people who, even with families, cannot receive that kind of care.

In fact, some even have to take care of their families...

Thinking about it that way, I can say I am fortunate that I only have to take care of myself.

But it is painful.

I want to believe that the "pain" of those who have families and the "pain" of those like me who live alone should not be compared.

"Rather than being number one, be the only one."

Both the wonderful things and the things that aren't.

On social media, there are also people who display their misfortunes as if they were treasures, aren't there?

It seems there are just as many of them as there are people posting about living in a sparkling world.

"It's my own life, so I want to do what I want."

Yes, that's true, isn't it?

I also live by the principle of "being free," so I won't deny the choices you make for yourself.

But how do the people watching from "this side" feel?

I don't use social media that much, I just peek at it occasionally,

"I'm not a successful person"

"I'm not unhappy either"

I am just one of those ordinary, fragile women who gets flustered thinking things like that.

I think every woman, no matter how sparkling she may seem, has at least once had the experience of staining her underwear during her period.

Even for those who scream about how unhappy they are every single day, I believe there is surely a moment once a day when a smile naturally breaks out.

Though our circumstances may differ, we are all women.

It's hard to talk about these things with real-life friends.

But I don't have the courage to post about it on social media.

For you, I am creating a membership called 'Nagi's Balanced Meal Club'.

I am moving along at my own pace, step by step, today as well, in preparation for the launch on May 1st.

No matter how old you get, periods are tough.

My hair just won't look right today.

It's perfectly fine to post things like that on the venting bulletin board.

I think I'll write there too.

The seasoning for my cooking turned out just right.

My boyfriend (or husband) was kind to me.

It would be lovely to have a bulletin board just for posting those small, everyday joys, wouldn't it?

'Nagi's Balanced Meal Club' is a closed community.

Only members can see your complaints or joys, and this is a place to discard the need for appearances or vanity, and simply take a deep breath.

For those who get to know me through 'Nagi's Balanced Meal Club' and would like to chat more personally, I am planning to offer a premium plan limited to one person per month, which includes one-on-one dialogue via a private LINE open chat and conversations via Zoom (without video).

Membership requirements

Age 45 or older

Weight 75kg or more

Women only

Limited to 11 people

As this is a closed membership, please keep conversations on the bulletin board and elsewhere strictly confidential.

Also, a portion of the proceeds from this membership will be donated to these activities.

In this Katsuo Club, you can join the membership starting from 100 yen per month, and all proceeds (excluding fees) are donated.

A dedicated account has been created and is also disclosed to members.

Encouraged by the activities of Miiko-san and Masaki-san, I decided to launch the 'Nagi's Balanced Meal Club'.

My small step becomes someone else's small step, and then everyone becomes happy.

A grand dream, isn't it? (laughs)

But you never know until you try, right?

I am taking that first step.

Even while rubbing my aching stomach on 'Girls' Day', I am having fun.

I am already looking forward to talking with you, who are sensitive yet kind-hearted, in this membership.