Nanakusa Battle🌿
The morning of the 7th of January.
A heavy, gloomy atmosphere hung over the Suzuki family living room.
Hiroshi and Takeru's digestive systems had reached their limit due to the death match against the "Living Osechi" and the consecutive nights of overeating and drinking.
“Ugh... my stomach... my stomach feels so heavy...”
“Dad, I think I’m going to... I’m going to throw up...”
As the two lay on the sofa like mummies, Yoshiko, the mother, appeared from the kitchen with a refreshing smile.
“Alright, today is for ‘Nanakusa-gayu’ (Seven-Herb Porridge)! It’s the day to rest the digestive systems we tired out over the New Year.”
In Yoshiko’s hand was a three-serving pack of seven herbs bought at the supermarket. The label read “Supervised by Demon Instructor: Spartan Detox Seven Herbs,” but as usual, no one paid it any mind.
Just as Yoshiko spread the contents of the pack on the cutting board and was about to chop them up, that was when—
“Attention!!!”
A military-like command echoed.
Startled, Hiroshi and Takeru jumped up to see the seven types of herbs standing in a crisp line, saluting.
“We are the ‘Digestive System Cleansing Special Forces Nanakusa.’ To live up to the name of the Green Berets, we will now begin the purification and cleansing of the Suzuki family’s digestive systems! Anyone with questions, raise a leaf!”
The leader, who appeared to be the Japanese parsley (Seri),
raised a leaf and declared.
“A... purification operation...?”
Hiroshi said, pushing up his crooked glasses.
“I will whip your flabby stomachs into shape!”
No sooner had he said that than the shepherd's purse (Nazuna) swung its shepherd's-purse-shaped head violently, flying toward them while spinning like a propeller.
“I-is that a Zero fighter?!”
Takeru shouted.
“First, warm-up exercises! Release the stomach acid! Release more!”
As Seri gave the order, the wind pressure created by Nazuna’s rotation made the fat on Hiroshi’s belly ripple.
“Eeeek! That tickles! Stop it!”
“Don’t be soft! Next, Cudweed (Gogyo) and Henbit (Hotokenoza)! Mental unification!”
Gogyo and Hotokenoza jumped onto Hiroshi and Takeru’s shoulders and began preaching into their ears with a rhythm like a Buddhist chant.
“Overeating... overdrinking... leads to... hell...”
“Eat... your vegetables... cut back... on the fat...”
“Stop with the mental attacks! My ears hurt!”
“Quiet! All units, move to physical force! Turnip (Suzuna)! Daikon radish (Suzushiro)! Suppress the lower abdomen!”
Following Seri's command, THUD! THUD! The root vegetable duo, Suzuna & Suzushiro, performed a body press onto Hiroshi's stomach as if they were wrestlers.
“Guhhh!!”
“We are going to physically push out the toxins and waste clogging up your stomach!!”
“Ah! ...I-I feel like something's coming out.”
Suzuna and Suzushiro began to spin on his stomach like Green Berets. It was far too intense for a stomach massage. Yet, strangely, along with the pain, the area around his stomach began to feel warm and toasty from the frictional heat.
“Ugh... it’s painful, but... I feel like my blood circulation is improving...!”
Hiroshi, with the two on his stomach, shouted with a pained yet ticklish expression.
“Me too...! Nazuna's wind pressure is making me unnecessarily hungry!”
Takeru was writhing his body.
The living room had become a scene of devastation, covered in grass and juices.
Flying leaves, groaning root vegetables, and echoing lectures.
“Meow...”
Mugi was in the corner of the room, munching on some chickweed that had fallen. To her, this was just a substitute for cat grass.
“That’s enough of that!!”
Thunder struck.
Yoshiko stood there, standing tall, holding a kitchen knife in one hand and a pot lid in the other.
“You guys! You came here to let our stomachs rest, didn't you! What are you doing hurting the family!”
Yoshiko glared down at the instructor, Seri, with a look like a Great Demon God.
“B-but Madame! (sweat) The toxins accumulated in their digestive tracts are, you see...”
“I’m the only one who needs to whip Father back into shape! You guys just shut up and get in the pot! Otherwise...”
Yoshiko made her kitchen knife glint.
Behind her, the golden aura that appeared when she suppressed the Osechi incident was rising once again.
“...I’ll put you in a blender and turn you into green juice, okay?”
“S-such a cruel thing to say, Madame...”
The Seven Herbs realigned themselves, jumped onto the cutting board on their own, and performed a sliding dogeza.
“Please... boil us...”
A few minutes later.
Fragrant, gentle steam was rising from the clay pot.
The Seven Herbs, which had been acting so wild, were now a vibrant green in the white rice porridge, softened and quietly settled like someone in a sauna.
Moreover, this year's Seven Herb Porridge was elegant, featuring shiratama rice cakes instead of small mochi.
“Here, enjoy.”
“Ohh.”
Hiroshi, having received the bowl served by Yoshiko, cautiously brought a spoonful containing Suzuna (turnip) and Suzushiro (daikon radish) to his mouth.
“...!”
It's soft.
It crumbles delicately in my mouth, a perfect finish where the sweetness of the rice, a hint of saltiness, and the aroma of the greens drift through my nose.
Those guys who were so Spartan before now seem to be gently soothing my stomach lining with all their might.
“So good... it really hits the spot... the rice balls are irresistible!”
Hiroshi groans.
“It feels like I'm being purified from the inside out...”
Takeru also closes his eyes, savoring the taste.
In the kitchen that had been a disaster, only the gentle steam and the sound of the family slurping their porridge echo.
“In the end, I couldn't beat Yoshiko this year either...”
“Oh my, I didn't do anything. As long as everyone stays healthy, that's all I need.”
Yoshiko laughs and puts her lips to her bowl.
It's cold outside, but a spring meadow has spread across the Suzuki family's dining table.
Hiroshi's stomach has completely recovered.
However, perhaps because he got a little too energetic, after finishing his meal, he says,
“Eating that porridge made me hungry. Should we have some katsudon?”
And with that, he gets his balding head smacked hard by Yoshiko with a box of plastic wrap.🍚🍀