Choosing words that reach the other person will improve your relationships | August 14th's luck-boosting talk

Getterz Iida has compiled
365 days a year, messages that accompany each day into
one book.
It is a book that reminds us with gentle words of
important things we tend to forget in our daily lives.

I myself gain new insights from this book every day.
I want to share those lessons with you, so I am updating it daily.
At the start of the day, I would be happy if this becomes a time that makes your heart feel a little lighter.

👇Click here for the Kindle version (e-book)

■ August 14th: "Things go well if you choose your words consciously"

The theme for August 14th is that
“It is important not just what you convey, but to choose your words according to the other person.”

Even when conveying the same content,
it gets through easily to some people,
while others have a hard time understanding it.

I think everyone has had that experience.

Depending on the person, their personality and values differ,
and so does how they receive words.

That is precisely why I think it is
important to think not only about “what I want to say,” but also
“how I should say it so it reaches the other person.”

■ "Saying it" and "getting it across" are different

“I said it clearly, so why don't they understand?”
Sometimes I think that.

But even if you intend to convey it,
if it doesn't reach the other person,
it hasn't truly been communicated.

Some people want to hear the conclusion first,
while others want to hear the reasons carefully.

Some people prefer short explanations,
while others want to know the background as well.

While watching the other person's reaction,
change your words, the order, and the amount of explanation slightly.

Even with just that small effort,
communication will become much smoother.

■ Look at what the other person values

In order to choose your words,
it is first necessary to know the other person.

For example, for someone who values reasons and evidence,
convey the conclusion and reasons clearly.

For someone who values feelings,
convey empathy or gratitude first.

For those who want to decide for themselves,
instead of forcing an answer on them, try showing them the options.

Even with the same content,just by changing how you convey it slightlythe way the other person receives it
will change significantly.

Adapting to the other person
is not the same as being fake.

Thinking, 'How can I explain this so it's easy for this person to understand?'is also
a form of consideration.

■ Rather than correct words, choose words that reach

When you think you are right,
you might end up just stating your logical argument as it is.

However, people are not moved by correctness alone.

No matter how correct the content is,
if it is said in an accusatory tone, it becomes difficult to accept it openly.

Instead of 'You are wrong',
try
'Maybe doing it this way would be even better'

Just bychanging your words slightlyin that way,
the way the other person receives it will also change.

Rather than forcing correctness,
talk while looking in the same direction as the other person.

That attitude
will move human relationships in a better direction.

■ Try changing your compliments depending on the person

When praising someoneas well, it doesn't mean you should use the same words for everyone.

Some people are happy to be complimented on their appearance,
while others are happier to have their efforts recognized.
Some may feel joy in having their work ethic appreciated.

'What does this person value?'
If you think about that and choose your words,
rather than generic compliments,your feelings will be conveyed much better.

Observing the other person closely. Noticing the good points in others.

That, too, isan important habit for choosing your words.

■ Small practices you can start today

Today, let's try thinking of just one person close to you.

And when you talk to that person,
try thinking just once, 'What kind of words would be easiest for this person to understand?'

If you are asking for a favor, instead of asking right away,
try adding a word of gratitude like, 'I'm always grateful for your help.'

If the person wants to know the conclusion quickly,
tell them the main point first.

If you are going to praise someone,
try telling them specifically what they are working hard on.

Just by being a little more conscious of your words,
your relationship with the other person will change.

What is important is not just 'saying' something, but
having it 'reach' the other person.

A single word chosen while thinking of the other person will
deepen your connections with people and should
guide your work, love life, and daily living in a better direction.

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Please enjoy past articles as well.

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