When I FIRE'd, Weekends Became Another World
When you FIRE,
a free and fulfilling daily life will come.
That's what I thought.
In reality, a significant portion has become free.
But recently, a new problem has emerged.
I don't want to go out on weekends.
I've become surprisingly averse to it.
The reason is simple.
Weekdays are just too good.
The breeze feels pleasant.
The trains are empty.
Movie theaters and museums are deserted.
Lunch is cheap, and the service is polite.
The staff have time to spare.
The whole world feels laid-back.
On the other hand, weekends are...
People, people, people.
Just the thought of meeting at a terminal station
has started to make me feel depressed lately.
But if I turn down too many invitations, I'll lose friends.
That's scary, too.
The other day, it happened to me for the first time in a while.
On a day I had plans for a late lunch
at a terminal station on the weekend,
the trains stopped for a safety inspection.
The platform was as crowded as the morning rush.
Just being careful not to bump into people inside the station was exhausting.
The lunch was on the pricey side.
And the food took forever to arrive.
“...So this is what the daily life of a
regular working adult was like.”
I thought deeply.
Two days later,
I went to a local hot spring on Monday morning.
The open-air bath was almost entirely to myself.
The cold water bath was refreshing.
The sauna was quiet.
It was the best.
While in the tub, I felt it sink in.
Ah, I have truly become a person of the weekday side now.
But at the same time, I felt a little scared.
Tolerance for crowds.
Waiting.
Unreasonable.
My tolerance for "what everyone else just endures"
feels like it's drifting further and further away.
When I think about it,
I thought FIRE meant "the disappearance of unpleasant things"that's all.
But,
the absence of unpleasantness does not equal happiness,
as it turns out.
Perhaps it wasn't just stress that I lost.
I remember my days as a company employee.
Complaining about mean customers or abusive bosses
with coworkers on the way home.
We're tired, it was tough, but let's work together and do our best!
Sharing and dividing the things that caused us stress.
Turning that into fuel for the next effort.
Perhaps that, too, was a part of happiness.
Sharing stress and pain, drinking alcohol, and laughing and crying together
That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.
FIRE isn't just about financial freedom,
it might also be about
deciding which stresses you are no longer willing to endure.
And when you stop enduring them,
you also lose the happiness of shared experiences.
To be honest,
I probably
cannot say that I want to become 100% an outsider.
It is a relief to FIRE and not have to deal with peer pressure or unnecessary social cues.
But it is also scary to find that my perspective
no longer aligns at all with those at the heart of society.
I can't fully fit into either world,
and I'm just drifting aimlessly.
I think I'm such a boring person.
But that is how I honestly feel right now.
In the crowds of the city,
I feel somewhat bewildered.
👇️
👇️
👇️
Have you ever felt, after FIREing or a long vacation,
a sense of 'strangeness, as if in another world, even though I'm doing the same things as before'?
Please let me know in the comments.
I also look forward to your likes and follows!!
Thank you for reading this far!
Thank you for reading this far!