[High School Entrance Exams: My Son | ep13] I Thought I Was Trusting Him

The story so far

Around the time the second semester started, my son began to get irritated more often.
His replies were basically just

"Huh?"

or

"What?"

It was especially bad in the mornings.

My son has always had trouble waking up, but no matter how many times I called him, he wouldn't get up.

Even when he did get up, he wouldn't move.

Every time I saw that, I remembered when he was in his first year of junior high.

Back when he couldn't go to school.

Is something wrong again?

Is school becoming difficult for him again?

Such anxieties would cross my mind.

That's why I couldn't help but nag him.

"Eat quickly."

"Stop looking at your phone and get changed."

Then, the reply I would get was a grumpy,

"What? I'm doing it!"

But he still wouldn't move.

"You're going to be late."

When I said that, he would let out a big sigh and head to the washroom.

There, my daughter would be, as always, obsessed with styling her bangs.

The sibling squabbles over the washroom had been a familiar sight in our house for years.

What was different was my daughter.

Back when she was in the middle of her rebellious phase, she would shoo my son away, saying, "You're annoying."

But now, she would say,

"What? Do you want me to switch?"
while going over to tickle him.

However, my son, who is in the middle of his own rebellious phase, couldn't just brush it off.
"Stop it! You're annoying!"

And then, a huge fight would start in the morning.

Even when I tried to intervene, the two of them wouldn't stop.

Mornings like that continued.

By the time he left the house, my son would slam the front door shut with a loud bang.

Maybe his anxiety about the entrance exams is growing.
Maybe his positive mindset has been broken again.

That's what I was thinking.
Then, one day.

In the report I received from his special needs teacher, something like this was written.

The moment I read that, I thought, "Oh no."

I had been thinking, "He's in his rebellious phase, so he must be in a bad mood."

"He must be stressed about the exams."


But the truth was different.

My son understood himself perfectly.

That he had trouble waking up.

That he got irritated in the morning.

Knowing that, he was trying to do things in his own way.
Yet, whenever he was even slightly grumpy or not moving as I expected, I would think,

"Is he going to stop going to school again?"

"Is something happening again?"

That's what I kept thinking.

I realized then that the memories of his first year of junior high were still lingering inside me.

Even though my son was moving forward, I was still looking at the son from the past.

Still, the words, "I know my mom cares about me," made me happy.

It had reached him properly.

Thinking that, the tension in my shoulders eased a little.

He was able to talk to his special needs teacher about things he couldn't tell me.

I was happy that my son had a place where he could speak his true feelings.

And it was an event that made me think that I, too, must gradually learn to let go.