The Truth Behind the Sweet Words 'It's Okay to Run Away'

"If it's too hard, it's okay to run away."

On social media and in the press, this phrase is repeated as if it were a magical prescription to save modern people.

Of course, I do not intend to deny the words themselves.

Escaping from an environment where your life or dignity is threatened is a necessary decision for survival.

There are indeed situations where, if you do not run away, you will lose your future itself.

However, what I fear is the current situation where that crucial premise is stripped away, and the phrase 'it's okay to run away' is left to walk alone.

That is far too irresponsible.

Because the act of 'running away' always comes with a price.

Everyone has their own 'castle'.

It could be your job, your company, your community, or your personal relationships.

You spend a long time building up trust and establishing your place in the world. That place is your castle.

That is why running away is not simply moving to a different location.

It is a choice to open the castle gates yourself and let go of that castle.

It is fine if you have multiple castles.

If you have assets, connections, and titles, and a next place to stay is already prepared, you can rebuild even if you lose one castle.

However, that is not the case for most people.

If you abandon your only castle, what awaits you is not a new castle.

It is an open field with no walls and no roof.

Building a castle again from there requires unimaginable time and effort.

Just as it is not easy to return from a common soldier to a lord, it is by no means easy for someone who has lost their social place to climb back up to the same level.

However, I also believe that under specific circumstances, it is perfectly fine to say 'it's okay to run away.'

Children can always 'run away.'

The reason is simple.

It is because behind every child stands a massive fortress known as their 'guardians.'

Even if they run away from school, quit club activities, or distance themselves from friendships, their daily life itself is protected by the ramparts of their guardians.

That is precisely why the option to run away is viable.

But for adults, it is different.

Adults have no one to protect their fortress for them.

You must maintain your own life, rent, food expenses, and reputation yourself.

That is what it means to be an 'adult.'

Furthermore, there is a reality we must not forget.

Every position in society has a 'capacity limit.'

If you leave, someone else will immediately fill that vacancy.

Companies, organizations, and markets are surprisingly cold.

Even if one person quits, the world keeps turning as if nothing happened.

In other words, those who lightly say 'it's okay to run away' do not guarantee the chair or the reputation you will lose afterward.

No one will recover the fortress you have lost on your behalf.

People feel reassured when they hear only pleasant-sounding words.

That is exactly why this phrase is spread so widely.

However, reality is not that simple.

However, I do not mean to say that you should hold your ground in every situation.

Even looking back at the Sengoku period, truly excellent warlords did not engage in pointless sieges.

If a battle cannot be won, one retreats.

But that retreat is not a rout.

You abandon the outer bailey, fall back to the second bailey, and rebuild your defensive line.

You regroup your forces, organize supplies, lure the enemy in, and wait for the right moment to counterattack.

This is not running away; it is a 'strategic retreat.'

Retreating itself is not the goal.

You retreat in order to reclaim what was lost.

Modern society is the same.

If you are going to change jobs, you retreat while looking for the next workplace.

You earn qualifications.

You build connections.

You secure living funds.

You maintain your credibility.

A retreat made after accumulating such preparations is by no means a defeat.

It is a stepping stone for the next victory.

What is dangerous is being pushed only by fear, and jumping out into the open field without defenses, supplies, or a path of retreat.

That is not a strategy.

It is merely getting lost.

Truth be told, I myself have the experience of 'running away'.

At the company I joined as a new graduate, my character was belittled, my spirit was broken, and I fled from that place.

However, no miracle occurred where my life suddenly improved the moment I ran away.

What awaited me were days of scraping by in the mud.

It took many long years to rebuild the trust I had lost, to stack up small jobs one by one, and finally to build a place that felt like a true home.

My current workplace is by no means larger in scale or capital than that company back then.

Even so, it has become far more of a place I can call 'my own castle' than it was back then.

That is why I know.

That there is no magical paradise waiting for you where you run to.

All that exists is the gritty, endless reality of rebuilding your castle from scratch.

Do not hand over the keys to your castle based on sweet words.

If the place you are in is a battlefield that strips away your life and dignity, retreat without hesitation.

However, that is not a flight.

It must be a withdrawal to reclaim your castle.

Once you have retreated, devise strategies, accumulate strength, build connections, and establish a new position while eating mud.

And then, stand up once more as the lord of your own life's castle.

For an adult, true kindness is not irresponsibly pushing someone's back by saying 'it's okay to run away'.

It is to show them the reality that awaits after running away without hiding it, and yet still show them how to survive.

It is true that losing your castle is not the end.

But it takes resolve to take it back.

Only when you speak while including that level of resolve does the word "run away" finally carry responsibility.