Create 3 Hours a Day! The Complete Guide to 'Stop Parenting' to Regain Peace of Mind
Thank you so much for all your hard work every day.
To you, who keeps moving from the moment you wake up until you go to bed at night without a moment to catch your breath.
I was the same way.
Making breakfast for the kids while running the laundry, going to the park or shopping in the morning, preparing lunch after getting home, cleaning, bathing, putting them to bed... before I knew it, it was 10 PM.
'My own time' was just an illusion.
But what I want to tell you here is that you are doing enough as you are.
The reason you don't have enough time is not because of a lack of ability or effort on your part. The true nature of the problem is the assumption that you 'have to do everything perfectly' and the trap of endless 'nameless chores'.
In this note, I will share how to secure at least one hour of personal time every day through small investments in 'systems' and 'tools,' rather than through sheer willpower.
This is a realistic time-saving strategy that I have practiced through trial and error myself.
Chapter 1: Kitchen & Meals (Conquering the Biggest Time Thief)
Having the option to 'not cook'
First, let me tell you a shocking fact.
The chore that steals the most time during childcare is cooking-related tasks. Thinking about menus, shopping, prep work, cooking, cleaning up... these add up to over two hours a day.
The first thing I let go of was the fixed idea that I 'have to make everything from scratch every day'.
Smart Outsourcing Techniques
Rely on meal kits or frozen meal delivery services 2-3 times a week. This alone reduces the time spent thinking about menus to zero.
I use both Yoshikei and nosh, and just being freed from the decision fatigue of 'what should I make today...' has made a world of difference in my peace of mind.
It doesn't have to be perfect. If you can make homemade meals half the week, that's a job well done.
3 Essential God-Tier Appliances and Their Return on Investment
Honestly, it took 'courage' to invest in appliances. But when I calculated the time-saving effects after installing them, they have completely paid for themselves.
Dishwasher: 30 minutes a day x 365 days = 182 hours saved per year
Hot Cook/Electric Pressure Cooker: Just put in the ingredients and press the button. You can play with your children while it cooks.
Récolte:Baby food and soup preparation completed in under 10 minutes
You might feel it's 'expensive.' But if you calculate it at an hourly wage of 1,000 yen, the dishwasher pays for itself in six months.
Automating thought: Fixing menus by day of the week
Monday is curry, Tuesday is noodles, Wednesday is rice bowls... By routinizing menus by day of the week like this, the time spent thinking disappears.
At first, I was worried, 'Won't they get bored?' but children surprisingly don't complain even with the same menu. You can just change the variations with seasonings.
Let go of perfectionism and create a 70% system. This is the strongest approach.
Physically eliminate prep work
Fully utilizing pre-cut vegetables, frozen broccoli, and pre-seasoned frozen foods will dramatically reduce the time spent using knives and cutting boards.
You might feel like it's 'cutting corners,' but the nutritional value doesn't change. What's important is sitting at the table without being exhausted.
Chapter 2: Cleaning, Laundry, and Shopping
Physically cutting down on housework 'processes'
From here on, we will tackle the time thieves outside the kitchen.
Laundry reform: Thorough use of a washer-dryer
My biggest regret is having wasted time 'hanging out laundry' for so many years.
Since introducing a washer-dryer, the hanging process has completely disappeared. Once you press the button on the washing machine, everything is fully automatic until it's dry. You can use this time to play with your children or take a little break.
Furthermore, put dried items on hangers and straight into the closet. Only underwear and towels need folding. This saved me 20 minutes a day.
The same goes for children's clothes. By using hanger management, the time spent searching for 'where is that outfit?' also became zero.
Floor automation: Making the robot vacuum the star
A robot vacuum is extremely effective when introduced alongside the habit of 'not leaving things on the floor'.
In our home, we set up a cleanup time with the kids to put toys into dedicated boxes. With the floor clear, the robot vacuum cleans automatically every morning.
I had given up, thinking 'it's going to get messy anyway...', but once you create a system, you can maintain it.
Eliminating Shopping: Automatic Replenishment System
The 30-minute round trip to the supermarket, 30 minutes in the store, and the kids' 'buy me that!' attacks... switching this to online grocery shopping and Amazon Subscribe & Save saved me three hours a week.
At first, I felt like the shipping fees were a waste, but when converted to an hourly wage, it's a complete net positive.
Consumables like diapers, tissues, and detergent are all automatically replenished via subscription. I'm also freed from the panic of 'Oh no, we're out!'
Considering the stress of taking kids to the supermarket, online grocery shopping was truly a godsend.
Preventive Housework: 10-Second 'While-You're-At-It' Cleaning
Small habits to prevent dirt from accumulating save you from major cleaning later.
After using the sink, wipe away water droplets with your hand (10 seconds). After a bath, use a squeegee to wipe down the walls (20 seconds). Just this has drastically reduced the frequency of mold cleaning.
Don't aim for perfection. Just make 'while-you're-at-it' tasks a habit. That is enough.
Chapter 3: Parenting Routines & Bedtime Edition
Running on Children's 'Independence' and 'Rituals'
While it's difficult to save time on the actual act of parenting, you can create time through 'preparation' and 'routinization'.
Preventing a Battlefield: The Night-Before Setup
The best way to prevent the morning rush is to have everything set up the night before.
Clothes for tomorrow, breakfast dishes, the outing bag... just by preparing these before bed, the morning 'Where is that?!' becomes zero.
At first, I didn't have the energy to prepare at night, but once I made the 5 minutes before putting the kids to sleep a routine, it became a habit.
10 minutes in the morning is worth more than 10 minutes at night. There is no doubt about this.
The Science of Falling Asleep: Ritualizing Bedtime
When it used to take over an hour to get my child to sleep, I was exhausted every night.
However, once I standardized the 'light, sound, and routine,' they started falling asleep within 30 minutes.
7:30 PM: Dim the room lights and give them 240ml of follow-up milk.
8:00 PM: Put them in the crib.
Following the same flow every day helps regulate the child's internal clock. Even if you can't do it perfectly every day, you'll see results if you stick to it 70% of the time. I've summarized the details in another article.
Speedy Bathing: All-in-One Products
Saving time during bath time is all about product selection.
I switched to all-in-one body soap, shampoo, and conditioner for children. Moisturizing is also completed with just one pump-style full-body lotion.
With just this, the post-bath 'apply this, apply that...' routine has disappeared.
Chapter 4: Mindset and Mental Care
Discarding 'Guilt' and Saving Yourself
This is the most important part.
No matter how many systems you create, you won't feel at ease if your mind is tied down.
Subtraction Thinking: The 'Stop Doing' List
Instead of increasing my 'to-do' list, I clarified what I should 'stop doing'.
Vacuuming every day -> Twice a week is fine.
Driving children to lessons -> Is it really necessary? Can it wait until later?
Perfect social media posts -> Cut down on the time spent viewing and posting in the first place.
After I stopped doing these things, no one was inconvenienced. On the contrary, I gained peace of mind and was able to be kinder to my child.
Breaking the Spell: Cutting Corners Does Not Mean Lack of Love
"If it's not homemade, it's not love," "Hiring help is a luxury"... Let's throw away these outdated values.
What matters is not aiming for perfection while feeling frustrated, but facing your children with peace of mind.
Whether you use frozen foods or let a robot vacuum do the work, your love for them does not diminish at all.
Redefining Outsourcing: An Investment in Your Family
I also felt guilty at first about using housekeeping services or babysitters.
But once I started using a housekeeping service twice a month (2 hours each time), I finally had the energy to play with my kids at the park on weekends.
This is an investment in your family, isn't it? You buy time with money and turn that time into high-quality moments with your family.
There is nothing wrong with that.
True Rest: Digital Detox
Even if you secure time for yourself, you won't recover from fatigue if you're just mindlessly scrolling on your smartphone.
I started leaving my phone in another room an hour before bed and making time to read a physical book. Just doing this has dramatically improved the quality of my sleep.
70% is good enough. Even if it's not perfect rest, taking care of yourself little by little is enough.
Chapter 5: Practice! A 1-Week Time-Saving Schedule
Before/After: Time Schedule Comparison
[Before Implementation]
6:00 Wake up -> Prepare breakfast/Laundry
7:30 Daughter wakes up -> Getting dressed/Breakfast is a battlefield
9:00 Park/Children's center/Shopping
12:00 Prepare lunch -> Feed them -> Clean up
13:00 Nap time (Chore time)
15:00 Snack time -> Playtime
17:00 Dinner preparation
18:00 Bath time -> Bedtime routine
21:00 Tidying up, hanging laundry, chores
22:30 Bedtime (Zero personal time)
[After implementation]
6:30 Wake up -> Relaxed thanks to prep the night before
8:00 Daughter wakes up (Fixed weekly breakfast menu)
9:30 Park/Children's center (Grocery shopping via online supermarket once a week)
12:00 Lunch (Using meal kits and frozen stock)
13:00 Nap time (Rest while the dryer is running)
15:00 Snack time -> Playtime
17:00 Dinner preparation (15 minutes using Hot Cook)
18:00 Bath time (Time-saving with all-in-one products)
20:00 Bedtime routine (5 minutes with a set ritual)
21:00 Personal time (Reading, side hustle, Netflix)
22:30 Bedtime
Difference: Creating 1.5 hours every day
3 Actions to Start Today
If you're wondering where to start, try these three things first.
Set up tomorrow's preparations the night before(Takes 5 minutes)
Fix your menu by day of the week(Just 5 patterns for Monday through Friday)
Make full use of a dryer(Minimize the hanging and folding process)
It's okay not to try to do everything perfectly. Let's move forward one step at a time, aiming for 70%.
Finally: Please reclaim your time
Everything written in this note is something I have practiced through trial and error myself.
I wasn't able to do it all from the start. I made plenty of mistakes, too.
But my life changed once I switched to the mindset that "it doesn't have to be perfect."
Your time is your own.
You don't have to dedicate everything to housework and childcare. Invest a little in systems and tools, and reclaim your time.
One hour every night that you can use for yourself. That alone makes a world of difference in your energy for tomorrow.
I would be happy if this note could be the trigger for your own small step forward.
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