When 'You Tried Your Best' Discourages Children: A 10-Year Follow-up on Mindset Research

First, a confession

This is a record of a confession.

Ten years ago, I wrote this in a book:

“Praise effort and process, not results! Keep an open mind!”

And I didn't just write it.

I spoke about it with full confidencein lectures and training sessions alike.
The slides still exist.
Exhibit A right here.

But please, let me make an excuse...

Back in 2008, when I was studying instructional design at the University of Georgia in the U.S., the world of education was wrapped in the excitement of something from Stanford.

You know the vibe—classrooms with rolling chairs and whiteboards everywhere. That sparkling, near-future atmosphere.

Design thinking from the d.school was starting to trend, and Professor Dweck's mindset research was gradually gaining mainstream acceptance.

Children who believe their abilities can grow through effort achieve better grades, so praise effort, not ability.

That was when such (new) educational perspectives began to spread.

Honestly, the atmosphere at the time was like this:

“If Stanford says it, it must be true.”

I was one of the first importers of these ideas, having returned to Japan bathed in that initial heat.
Well, I suppose I was just delirious with the fever of having returned from America.

After that, it went viral on TED, the White House held conferences, and the Japanese translation became a bestseller. By the time the boom fully arrived in Japan, I was already on the side of those giving lectures.

I even practiced it in schools. Regardless of the test results, I would just say,

“You tried your best!” (smug face)

But then one day, a student said this to me:

“Even if you tell me I tried my best when I couldn't do it anyway, it actually makes me feel more discouraged.”

Huh?The magic wordsaren't working...

I've left this uneasy feeling alone for 10 years.

Last week, while I happened to be re-reading my own book, I came across a program featuring a special on "You can do it if you try."

The unease stirred.

I immediately went back and read a summary of the subsequent mindset research in academic papers.
It was a decade where researchers around the world seriously verified the "You can do it if you try" concept.

Let me give you the conclusion first.

There is no such thing as "magic words" that change a child just by changing your vocabulary for praise.

So, does that mean it was all a waste or a lie? Not necessarily.

However!

The conditions under which the belief that "you can do it if you try" holds power have been identified.and that is it.

And those conditions were exactly connected to the one thing that student said.

A 370,000-person follow-up

In 2018, a meta-analysis was conducted that gathered so-called "mindset research" published up to that point. The data set included 370,000 people.

There was indeed a correlation where children who believe they can do it if they try have better grades.

However,it only explains about 1% (r = 0.1, r^2 = 0.01) of the difference in grades.

Moreover, the results variedwidelyfrom study to study, and it was by no means something that could be called "magic."

However, this inconsistency strangely led to the next study.

When averaged out across the board, there was almost no effect.

So, what is the difference between where it worked and where it didn't?

This is how the places where it works were found.

The answer to that came in a 2019 study, a randomized controlled trial involving 12,000 students across 65 schools in the U.S.

It was a super simple intervention experiment that used less than an hour of online material to convey the idea that 'abilities can grow'.

And it hit the mark perfectly, especially for students who were in the lower academic tier at their schools.

For the kids who were already doing well, almost nothing happened...

Broadcasting 'you can do it if you try' to everyone at once just ends up being a blank shot. Bang.

And this is the key point of the paper.

The change in belief itself occurred in the same way at every school.

However!

What was more likely to lead to academic improvement were schools with an atmosphere where 'taking on difficult challenges is the norm'.

In schools where everyone around them chose easy problems, the enthusiasm to 'give it a try' that had finally sprouted evaporated within a few months.

In other words, I've mentioned on my blog that the learning environment is important, and that's exactly it.

Seeds and Soil

The research team themselves provide a great example for this.

What is needed is good seed (belief) and the soil (environment) for it to grow in.

Ten years ago, I only talked about improving the seed varieties and didn't look at the soil at all.

By the way, this 'soil' couldn't be measured by surveys of student awareness (e.g., what they think in their hearts), but only by actual behavior (e.g., how many difficult problems they choose). The atmosphere isn't made of words, but of the behavior of those around you.

And one more thing.

In the online intervention, the students weren't just taught that 'you can do it if you try'.

As a finishing touch, they were also tasked with writing advice in their own words for younger students who would be struggling next year.

Basically, people believe the words they say to others, not the words they are told.

I wrote about how learning is essentially a social activity in a previous post about Rogoff, so please refer to that.

The student was right

So, what was that student's comment?

Even if you tell me I tried hard, it actually makes me feel worse when I still can't do it.

At the time, I just took it as 'maybe I'm not good at praising.' But that wasn't it.

What's interesting here is that even Dr. Dweck, the guru of mindset herself, issued a warning in later years.

She stated that empty praise for effort is a fake growth mindset.

When there are no results, saying 'you tried hard' can reach a child as a signal of consolation, implying 'I no longer expect anything from you.'

In other words, the

Wow, that's amazing! and You tried hard!

that I kept repeating, thinking I understood, were, scientifically speaking, empty shots that discouraged the students—a sad conclusion.

From tomorrow, till the soil instead of just using words

Now, for those of you who feel down after reading this far, here is some good news.

Here is one thing you can do starting tomorrow, both at home and at school.

At home, try changing 'You tried hard' to 'How did you do it?'

Don't just end with 'You tried hard'; ask about their method.

The moment a child articulates their own ingenuity is the real point of intervention.

On days they couldn't do it, instead of consoling praise, ask 'Where did you get stuck?' together.

At school, have them write 'strategy advice for juniors who will learn this unit next year' at the end of the unit.

This is a way to apply the mechanism used in that nationwide experiment to the classroom. It is not the one being taught, but the one teaching who changes.

That is why teaching each other is important.

You might not be good at teaching it at first, so it might be a good idea for the teacher to intervene as appropriate and think together about how to make it easier to understand.

Learning science is all about correction.

I think it's not so much that I was wrong 10 years ago, but that my resolution was low.

For whom, in what environment, and with what method of communication does it work?

I was too obsessed with 'new education' to have the capacity to think about such things. However, the verification over these past 10 years has identified exactly that.

The 10 years you spent praising effort were not in vain, either.

We just learned how to make it effective,

By the way, in that 2019 nationwide experiment, Dr. Dweck herself is listed among the authors of the paper.

The proponent herself put her own theory to the test and turned to identifying the 'conditions under which it works'.

10 years ago, I believed it because 'Stanford says so'.

Frankly, that was shallow.

But the saving grace is that the proponent herself

'It doesn't work the same way for everyone. Let's identify the people it works for and the environments where it works.'

She updated it to say that. This is the health of science.

So, to all of you who listened to my books or lectures 10 years ago and 'just kept praising them' for the time being.

Sorry, it's time for an update. Are you ready?

In order not to let the 'seeds' we sowed back then rot, let's enter the phase of tilling the 'soil' together from here on out.

By the way, 10 years from now, I might be saying, 'Wow, that was so shallow' about my current resolution.

When that happens, I will repent grandly again, so please feel free to call me out without mercy.

Summary point: How to keep 'you can do it if you try' from being a blank shot

1. Create an atmosphere where it is okay to take on challenges
The atmosphere is created not by words, but by the behavior of those around. Let's create an environment where children who choose the harder path are not at a disadvantage.

2. Do not broadcast the same words to everyone
Deliver messages individually, especially to children who are currently struggling. For those who are already doing well, talk about their next challenge.

3. Don't just teach; have them explain it to someone else
People believe the words they say to others. Giving advice to a younger student or asking, 'Can you teach me that?' is enough.

4. Don't stop at 'You tried your best'; ask 'How did you do it?'
Look at their ingenuity and struggles together, and connect them to the next step.