[Creative Award Impressions] (1) "Noyagi-san": Surviving the act of causing harm just by existing.

I totally get it!

I apologize for such a brief impression right off the bat. But that was the first thing I thought when I read this article.

I myself am a mysterious middle-aged woman who works from home and is single; from an outsider's perspective, if someone pointed at me and asked, 'What is this person doing?', I would have no choice but to shrug my shoulders.

Sometimes, if I'm just walking through town, I can manage to keep my composure, but when I walk near a park on a holiday where happy parents and children are playing, a sudden tension runs down my spine.

Am I even allowed to walk here...?

These days, there are many reports of suspicious individuals.
A middle-aged woman with no makeup and dressed all in black (my Muji dress was black) walking around a park with children—as you can tell from my writing style, I'm already at a point where it wouldn't be strange if I were reported, so I have no choice but to apologize: I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

---Am I not even allowed to go for a walk!

I retorted immediately after writing that, but I understand that from the perspective of a child's parent, it's unbearable. Ah, I want to become a shellfish, too.

However, there is one thing I want to say to Noyagi-san.

As expected of a survival expert, looking at the conversation, wouldn't it be okay to relax a little more!?

"When I cut my hair, I looked younger..."

The woman who said that probably has a cushion in her heart.
Of course, everything the etiquette instructor who appeared in Noyagi-san's mind said is correct.

But you know.

I'm sure the woman she was talking to definitely has it. A frank trust in Noyagi-san.

---If it's this person, they surely won't say anything strange about my appearance.

I think there is that kind of cushion (trust) in the conversation.

Everyone has a cushion of trust in their heart. Or you could call it resolve.
It is a small resolve to ask for an opinion about one's appearance precisely because one trusts the other person.

What is needed for survival might be the worry that 'I might hurt the other person' and the resolve to 'accept it even if I get hurt a little.'

Of course, it would be absolutely better if such things didn't exist.
Especially regarding resolve, perhaps the correct answer in today's world is that 'there is no need to have it.'

Even so, it's person to person. Unfortunately, I cannot become a shellfish.

That is why I think the words Noyagi-san returned were the correct answer.

If I may speak as a woman myself, if I ask someone of the opposite sex about my appearance, saying 'It was like this,' I think I have the resolve to say, 'Alright, I'll take on whatever comes' (at least that's how I am).

I also have an experience that is very similar to Noyagi-san's situation.

"Senba-san, you look young."

When someone of the opposite sex suddenly said that to me, I was honestly a little happy.

But if I said, "Hehe, I guess so, right?"
I'm sure they'd think I'm such a conceited person.

However, if I replied, "Eh? That's not true at all."
Isn't that just a bit too ordinary?

If I borrow the tempo of conversation from the etiquette instructor inside Noyagi-san, it's 0.2 seconds.
I probably spent 0.1 seconds on this thought process. Oh crap, how should I reply?

And so, the words that came out of my mouth were:

"Well, I've been restless until this age."

Oh? I managed to come up with a pretty interesting reply. I wonder if they'll laugh and reply back.

"That's true." (Straight face)

That's true!? What do you mean "that's true"? You're not going to laugh!?
Or rather, isn't that rude? You should have denied it, hey!

……No, wait. I realized later that the other person might have been looking for the typical response, which wasn't B, but rather, "That's not true at all."……

ーーThat kind of thing happens too.

Since then, I've decided to be prepared. Are you a samurai or something?

Reading Noyagi-san's essay, I had no choice but to nod from beginning to end.

In this day and age, older people, people of the same generation, and younger people all have soft and delicate "no-go zones."
Anyone could potentially hurt that zone in a fleeting moment.

"What should I even talk about?"

While asking myself that, I still continue to live in this world.

Thank you for the wonderful essay!

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