Three-Topic Short-Short Story: Perfect

Just as rakugo performers do their three-topic stories, I, Koji, shall try my hand at one as well.

I am terrible at project-based tasks.

Even if it is a project from someone I am close to, I find it hard to just go along with it.

Of all things in the world, I hate restrictions like "rules," "regulations," "time limits," and "deadlines" the most.

No matter how old I get, I remain a stubborn brat. That is who I, kojuro, am.

Huh? Rakugo? A three-topic story? Yasu-san?

The little kojuro inside my heart muttered to himself.

Koji, you're also known as "Amanojaku Shiro" (the contrarian), aren't you? If someone told you, "Even if you can't write it, that's fine. But it's a waste not to try!" wouldn't that actually make you want to write it?

What are you talking about?

Fine, I'll write it. I'll write it. I'll write it, okay, Little One? Will that satisfy you?

Lifting my heavy, heavy backside—heavier than a black hole—I take up my pen in a state of half-desperation.

Well then, let us begin the three-topic short-short story, "Perfect."

If you can throw a peanut as high as you can and catch it in your mouth on the pitcher's mound, you can become a top-tier pitcher. That was a story at my junior high school. Musashi was a clumsy guy. On a team known for hitting, his batting was lackluster. The manager converted the team's only left-handed thrower into a pitcher.

However, he was a genius of effort. He arrived earlier than anyone else, practiced later than anyone else, and his notebook was packed with ideas and records of his progress. The manager always said, "The answer will be clear in 10 years." On graduation day, we did it for fun. And he was the only one who succeeded. In the final game of last year's Japan Series, he struck out everyone on three pitches each. The guy who pulled off an 81-pitch perfect game said on the podium, "Our strength is our defense. Next, I will achieve a 27-pitch perfect game." And now. In this game to decide the national championship. Two outs in the bottom of the ninth. He threw his 27th pitch with all his might. A super slow ball! The off-balance bat sent up an easy fly, and game set.

An urban legend? No, no. It's a space legend, isn't it.

As I was about to talk to my wife about this and that regarding Yasu-san's three-topic story project, I glanced at the sofa, and my wife pointed to her legs and said with a smile.

Is that so? A three-topic story? Like in rakugo? Or a short-short? By Yasu-san? Did you write it? Another clumsy one? You're just bothering everyone! Well then, in honor of that, shall we go with a triple-return massage(Note 1)? Pe-pe-pen, pen!

…….

When I give her a massage, my wife is in a good mood.

When my wife is in a good mood, our home is peaceful.

Therefore.

This is fine.

(Note 1) 'Massa' is short for massage. My wife, Sacchan, calls it that. Giving Sacchan a 'massa' is my most important daily routine.