Things to Remember Before You Have Subordinates #14: A Leader Must Endure Loneliness

I think many people hope to get promoted once they enter the workforce. When you get promoted, you will have subordinates. In other words, you become a leader.

Most of those people will want to be good leaders. As a goal, they might imagine themselves chatting happily and harmoniously among their subordinates.

Of course, a leader needs to be respected. It is necessary to be trusted and admired by subordinates. However, gaining respect and being chummy are not the same thing.

In reality, the more a leader gains respect, the lonelier they become. It may seem contradictory, but that is how it is. The reality is that you cannot gain respect as a leader if you are always in the circle of your subordinates.

Pulling subordinates from the front and sometimes pushing them from behind—that is the role of a leader. You must scold when necessary and support when necessary. You cannot fulfill that role if you are just blending in with your subordinates.

Conversely, it is precisely because you stand apart that you can gain respect as a leader. If you blend in with your subordinates, they might feel a sense of familiarity toward you. However, they will not see you as a leader.

Standing apart alone—you must be able to endure that loneliness. If you give in to the loneliness and blend in with your subordinates, the organization will lose its cohesion.

If you stand apart, you can remain equidistant from each member. If you blend in with your subordinates, you can no longer remain equidistant from each member. If you get close to a specific subordinate, the distance between you and the other subordinates increases.

The subordinates who are close to you might admire you. However, the subordinates who are distant will not admire you. A rift will also form between the subordinates who admire you and those who do not.

As a result, the organization will stop functioning well, and even the subordinates who admired you will inevitably feel stress. And then, they will begin to blame the leader who created such a workplace.

A leader must endure loneliness. If you give in to it and blend in with your subordinates, you will lose both your function as a leader and your respect.

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