Novel 'The Teacher Before Becoming a Teacher' Episode 2: The Kind Teacher

1. The Popular Teacher

　When the long weekend ended, the atmosphere in the classroom loosened just a little.

　The children's greetings, which had still been stiff in April, had become a bit more casual by the time May arrived. The sound of shoes being taken off, the sound of teaching materials being placed on desks, and the voices calling for the teacher all sounded closer than before.

　Shingo Mitsuhashi, too, no longer stopped at the entrance like he had on his first day.

　Even so, every time he entered the classroom, his back straightened just a little.

　He was still not used to being called 'teacher'.

　There was always something small placed on Misaki Saeki's desk.

　A pale pink pencil case. A cat-shaped sticky note. Floral masking tape. And then, a small eraser she said she had received from a student.

　When Mitsuhashi first saw them, those items placed on the long desk of the cram school looked a bit out of place.

　The classroom of Step-by-Step Tutoring was, as always, seemingly organized yet unorganized. Memos for parents were piled up on the counter, and several half-used red pens were rolling around next to the copier. Faint pencil marks left behind by students remained on the long desk.

　In the midst of that, only the area around Misaki's desk was a little bright.

'Hello, Teacher Misaki.'

　An elementary school girl waved as soon as she entered the classroom.

'Hello, Miyu-chan.'

　Misaki looked up and smiled.

　She was a petite teacher.

　A fourth-year university student. Her hair was just below her shoulders, softly curled inward. Her voice was soft, too. She had a habit of tilting her head slightly when she smiled.

　She was three years older than Mitsuhashi. But more than the age difference, Misaki looked like a teacher in the classroom.

　At least, that was how the students saw her.

'Is it math again today?'

Yeah. But the homework was difficult.

I see. Then let's look at it together.

Yay!

The girl called Miyu sat down next to Misaki, looking happy.

Miyu Yoshioka. A fifth-grade elementary school student.

She wore her hair in two pigtails, and her pencil case had a character keychain attached to it. She was a girl who laughed often. Even before the lesson started, she already seemed to be having fun.

Watching that, Mitsuhashi felt a little envious.

Ever since Sho Mizusawa's class, Mitsuhashi had become a bit cautious about his own teaching.

Was he explaining too much?
Were the children really looking at the problems?
Was he just searching for what a 'good teacher' should look like?

When he thought too much, he didn't even know when the right time to speak up was.

In that regard, Misaki was natural.

Miyu-chan, let's take out your homework first.

Okay!

Oh, you did it properly.

But there aren't many circles.

Even if there aren't many circles, it's great that you did it.

When Misaki said that, Miyu beamed.

Mitsuhashi thought to himself.

If he could become a teacher like that, the children would probably feel at ease.

At that moment, Nojima called out from inside the counter.

“Mitsuhashi-kun, could you watch the second half of Misaki-sensei’s class today?”

“Me?”

“Yes. I think it will be a good learning experience for you.”

Nojima took off his round glasses and pulled at the hem of his knit vest to wipe the lenses.

“Misaki-sensei is very popular with the parents, you know.”

“I know. The students are very attached to her, too.”

“Yes.”

Nojima put his glasses back on.

“However, a popular class and a class that builds real skill aren't always the same thing.”

Mitsuhashi couldn't answer right away.

It sounded like the words spoken before something else was about to happen.

2. I Can Do It If I'm With You, Teacher

Miyu’s math lesson was on percentages.

“If an item is sold at a 20% discount from the list price, the selling price is 1,200 yen. What is the list price?”

Miyu read the problem and immediately looked at Misaki’s face.

“This is the kind I’m bad at.”

“Percentages?”

“Yeah. I don’t know which one is the base amount.”

“I see. Then let’s organize it together.”

Misaki took out a pink pen and drew lines on the problem text.

First of all, a 20% discount means making it 20% cheaper than the list price, right?

Yeah.

Then, what percentage of the list price will the selling price be?

Miyu looked like she was thinking for a moment.

However, her eyes were not on the problem, but on the tip of Misaki's pen.

Um... 80%?

That's right! Amazing.

Misaki immediately drew a circle.

Miyu smiled happily.

So, that means 1,200 yen is 80%.

Yeah.

Since the list price is 100%, what should we do?

Um...

Miyu's pencil stopped.

At the same time it stopped, Miyu looked at Misaki.

Misaki immediately drew a small diagram in the margin of the notebook.

It's easier to understand if you think of this as 100% and this as 80%.

Oh, I get it.

Then, do you remember the formula for percentages?

Ku, mo, wa...?

Right, right. The quantity being compared, the base quantity, and the rate. What are they asking for this time?

Since it's the list price... is it the base quantity?

Yes. And the quantity being compared?

The selling price of 1,200 yen.

And the rate?

Eighty percent. So... 0.8.

Exactly. And when you need to find the base quantity?

Quantity being compared divided by the rate.

That's right.

Miyu wrote down the equation.

1200 ÷ 0.8 = 1500

I did it!

You did. You worked really hard.

Misaki drew a big circle.

Miyu looked at her notebook with satisfaction.

When I work with Misaki-sensei, I feel like I can do it.

That makes me happy.

But when I do it at home, I can't. It's strange.

Miyu said it as if she were truly puzzled.

Mitsuhashi was struck by that remark.

It can't be done at home.
It can be done when with the teacher.

That seemed like a common story.

Because it's reassuring when the teacher is there.
Because the teacher explains things clearly.
Because one is alone at home.

However, while looking at the current problem, Mitsuhashi felt a little bit puzzled.

Miyu had certainly solved it.

Misaki's explanation was also easy to understand.

Her voice was gentle, and the child seemed to be having fun.

In fact, Miyu had been smiling the whole time.

Even so, for some reason, a small snag remained deep in his chest.

He didn't even know himself what was bothering him.

However, when Miyu said, 'I can do it when I'm with the teacher,' only those words remained strangely in his ears.

I can do it when I'm with the teacher.

Isn't that a good thing?

Mitsuhashi didn't understand yet.

3. The Grateful Teacher

As the end of the lesson approached, Miyu's mother came to pick her up.

Saori Yoshioka.

She was a cheerful mother who laughed often. When she entered the classroom, Miyu waved at her immediately.

'Mom, I did it again today.'

'That's great.'

Saori bowed deeply to Misaki.

'Teacher, thank you so much for everything. Honestly, ever since you became her teacher, this child hasn't complained about going to cram school anymore.'

'Oh no, not at all.'

Misaki smiled, looking a little embarrassed.

'Miyu-chan is always working hard.'

'She's not like that at all at home, though.'

Saori gave a wry smile.

'When she's with you, she seems to enjoy solving the problems. But when she does her homework at home, she doesn't make any progress at all. She doesn't even get any marks, and she just says, "I don't get it."'

Miyu pouted.

'That's because the teacher isn't there when I'm at home.'

'Well, that's true, I suppose.'

Saori laughed.

'It must be the power of a teacher. To think it makes such a difference just by having you sitting next to her.'

Misaki waved her hand slightly.

'That's not true. But I do think Miyu-chan is the type who really grows when she's praised.'

'That's right. At her previous cram school, it seems the teacher was scary, so she wasn't doing well at all. It's a real help to have someone as kind as you looking after her, Misaki-sensei.'

Mitsu-hashi felt a slight unease as he listened to the conversation.

The mother was not blaming Misaki.
Rather, she was grateful.

Miyu also seemed happy.
Misaki also seemed happy.

It appeared that no one was having any trouble.

The only fact that it cannot be done at home remained placed in the corner of the desk.

That was when it happened.

"I see."

A familiar, low voice spoke.

Mitsuhashi turned around reflexively.

Oyama was standing beside the counter before he knew it.

Come to think of it, Cram School Director Nojima had said that Mr. Oyama was coming today.

How long had he been watching the class? He hadn't even noticed him enter.

A high-end-looking three-piece suit. An unironed shirt. Hair that could look good if styled, but showed no signs of being cared for.

Oyama was looking at Miyu's notebook.

It was a notebook full of circles. There were also many red pen lines, diagrams, and words.

When Miyu saw Oyama, she moved a little closer to Misaki.

Misaki noticed this and immediately gave her a smile.

"It's okay."

Seeing this, Oyama narrowed his eyes slightly.

"That 'it's okay,' who was that directed at?"

"Huh?"

Misaki looked up.

Oyama tapped Miyu's notebook lightly with his finger.

"How many minutes did this child spend thinking today?"

Misaki looked confused for a moment, as if she didn't understand what he meant.

"How many... minutes?"

"That's right. In total."

"Um..."

Misaki looked at her notebook.

The notebook had many pages filled in.

Corrections for the previous homework.

Next to that was a summary of percentages that Misaki had written.

Three new example problems were also lined up.

There were many red checkmarks.

However, there was one thing that bothered him.

There was overwhelmingly more of Misaki's handwriting than Miyu's.

Misaki said, looking a bit bewildered.

"I think I spent quite a while thinking about it."

Oyama shook his head.

"You didn't even spend a minute thinking."

The air in the classroom seemed to freeze for a moment.

Misaki's cheeks turned red.

"But, I solved them."

"You did, yes."

Oyama said it indifferently.

Misaki's eyes wavered.

Mitsuhashi gasped.

The way he said it was harsh.

However, she understood what he meant.

Oyama had been watching Miyu, even when it seemed he wasn't.
The time it took for Misaki's pen to move, and the time it took for Miyu's pencil to move.
The speed at which Misaki gave hints.
The short interval between Miyu making a troubled face and help arriving.

That was what he had been watching.

'You can solve it when you're with the teacher, can't you?'

Oyama said, still looking at the notebook.

'The teacher is solving it right beside you.'

Miyu looked at Misaki anxiously.

Misaki tried to say something immediately.

At that moment, Oyama said,

'See?'

Misaki's mouth stopped.

'Even now, you tried to help her.'

4. Memories of Kindness

Misaki was not good with harsh words.

She had been that way since she was a child.

Her father was not a bad person.
He was diligent at work, cared for his family, and was genuinely worried about Misaki's future.

However, only when teaching me schoolwork did he become a different person.

"Why don't you understand this?"

"I just explained it, didn't I?"

"Crying won't help you solve it."

The living room table.
Eraser shavings.
Calculation formulas corrected with a red pencil.
My father's low voice.

Misaki began to check her father's mood before looking at the problems.

Whenever she tried to think, her mind would go blank.
Even when she looked at the numbers, no formulas came to mind.
The more she tried not to make a mistake, the more her hand would freeze.

Seeing that her grades weren't improving even with him teaching her at home, her father enrolled Misaki in a private tutoring school.

During the interview, her father told the school director,

"My child is soft, so please assign her a strict male teacher."

The first teacher assigned to her was exactly as her father had requested.

He had a loud voice and explained things quickly.
If she forgot her homework, he would scold her clearly.
When she made a mistake, he would say, "This is basic."

In front of that teacher, too, Misaki's mind still wouldn't work.

Her grades did not improve.

In fact, her stomach would start to hurt as the tutoring days approached.

One day, the school director said to her father,

"Let's change her teacher."

Her father looked dissatisfied.

"Wouldn't it be better to be even stricter?"

The school director shook his head.

"I don't think what this child needs is strictness."

The next teacher in charge was a young woman.

That teacher said in the first lesson,

"It's okay to take your time."

Misaki couldn't believe it.

"First, let's look together at what you understand."

Even when she made a mistake, the teacher's voice didn't get harsh.

"You've got it right up to here."

"You got stuck here, didn't you?"

"Then, let's try just one thing next."

Beside that teacher, for the first time, Misaki was able to look at the problems.

Not at her father's face.
Not at the teacher's mood.
But at the problems themselves.

Little by little, math stopped being scary.

Her scores went up, too.

For Misaki, a kind teacher was not just an ideal.

It was the existence that saved her.

That is why Misaki had decided, when she became a teacher,

I will absolutely not scare children.
I will absolutely become a teacher who makes children feel safe.

Now, Miyu is looking at her anxiously.

I want to help her.

That feeling had become almost a reflex for Misaki.

5. Who is helping whom?

After class, Nojima decided to use the small interview room.

"Yoshioka-san, do you have a moment?"

Saori nodded with a slightly anxious look on her face.

Miyu moved to the desk Morita was watching.

Misaki was called in as well.

Finally, Oyama entered the interview room in silence.

"Mitsuhashi-kun, you continue with the class observation."

Nojima said that before closing the door.

"Yes."

Mitsuhashi replied.

However, he did not feel like returning to his desk.

He couldn't help but wonder what Oyama had been looking at earlier.

The door to the interview room was closed.

But the classroom was small.

The voices from beyond the door could be heard in fragments.

The interview room had a round table and four chairs. A paper showing the school's achievement record was posted on the wall, but the edge of the paper was slightly peeling.

Even though Misaki sat in the chair, she kept her back straight.

Saori Yoshioka sat opposite her.

Nojima began to speak slowly, as if to set the stage.

“Ms. Yoshioka, I’m sorry for taking your time so suddenly today. It’s not that there’s any major problem, but I wanted to discuss how to proceed with the lessons going forward.”

Saori looked at Misaki with anxiety.

“Are you saying there is a problem with Misaki-sensei?”

“No, that’s not what this is about.”

Nojima shook his head immediately.

“Misaki-sensei is an important teacher for Miyu-chan. There is no doubt about that. However, you mentioned that she cannot solve problems when she is alone at home, right?”

“Yes.”

“I would like to review that part a little.”

At that point, Nojima looked at Oyama.

“Oyama, if you would.”

Oyama had Miyu’s notebook open.

Problems marked with circles.
Diagrams drawn by Misaki.
Equations written by Miyu.
Traces of a pencil that stopped midway and moved again with Misaki’s assistance.

Oyama looked at them for a while.

Then he looked up.

“This notebook has circles in it. But, there are few traces of Miyu-chan’s own thinking.”

Saori furrowed her brows.

“Traces of thinking, you say?”

“Yes. There are many traces of the teacher’s explanations. Many of the teacher’s diagrams. Many of the teacher’s words. But there are few traces of where Miyu-chan got lost, what she chose, or what she tried.”

Misaki bit her lip slightly.

"But Miyu is not good at math and tends to get anxious. So, I have to make her feel at ease first."

"Not bad."

Oyama said immediately.

Misaki was a little surprised.

"Kindness is not bad. Reassurance is also necessary."

Oyama continued.

"However, making someone feel at ease is different from depriving them of time to think."

The interview room went quiet.

Saori still didn't seem fully convinced.

"But she really seems to enjoy it when she's with the teacher. She used to hate going to her previous cram school, so I'm grateful for that alone."

"That is also important."

Nojima said.

"It is thanks to Misaki-sensei that she is now able to attend without hating it."

Misaki's eyes welled up a little.

Oyama looked at Misaki.

"You had a scary teacher in the past, didn't you?"

Hearing Oyama's words through the door, Mitsuhashi involuntarily looked up.

Is he talking about Misaki-sensei?

The inside of the interview room became a little quiet.

The next words could not be heard.

After a while,

"It's not so much a teacher... it's my father."

I heard Misaki's voice say.

Mitsuhashi involuntarily held his breath.

Her voice became quieter.

"My father was strict about my studies. After that, at cram school, I was assigned to a strict male teacher. But it didn't work at all. Finally, I switched to a kind female teacher, and for the first time, studying became fun, and my grades went up."

Oyama listened in silence.

"That's why I..."

Misaki paused for a moment.

"I don't want to make children feel scared."

"I suppose so."

Oyama said.

His voice was a little lower than usual.

"You were saved by that, weren't you?"

"Yes."

"Then, that teacher must have been a good teacher."

Misaki looked up.

Oyama continued.

"But, you back then and Miyu-chan now are different people."

Misaki's eyes wavered.

You think you're looking at Miyu-chan, but you're looking at your past self.

That's not...

It is.

Oyama said briefly.

If you see a child crushed by harshness, kindness is the prescription. But for a child who is used to kindness and waits for help before thinking, a different prescription is needed.

Misaki fell silent.

It wasn't just kindness that saved you.

Oyama closed Miyu's notebook.

That was the cram school director's diagnosis. He saw that harshness was wrong for this child. That's why he changed the teacher. Because the prescription was right, you grew.

Misaki couldn't say anything.

Right now, you are giving the medicine called kindness to every child.

Oyama's voice was quiet.

Medicine works if it's the right fit. If it doesn't fit, there are side effects.

Saori took a small breath.

Side effects...

Waiting for help before thinking. They can't solve it without a teacher. They are left with only the feeling of having done it. But they haven't gained any real ability.

Misaki's hands were clenched tightly on her lap.

I intended to be helping them.

There are times when you are helping.

Oyama said.

"But today was different."

Misaki looked up.

"Today, you weren't helping Miyu."

Oyama paused for a beat.

"You were just reacting to Miyu's anxiety."

At those words, Misaki's face twisted.

Saori, too, remained silent.

A kind teacher.
A grateful teacher.
A teacher children don't dislike.

For the first time, it felt like something else could be seen behind those words.

6. The Lesson of Waiting

Oyama said he would redo the lesson.

Miyu was returned to the same long desk.

Misaki sat next to her.
However, this time, it was with the promise not to interfere.

Mitsuhashi watched from a desk a little further away.
Nojima stood by the counter, and Saori stood beside him with her arms crossed.

Oyama placed a new problem in front of Miyu.

"If an item is sold at a 30% discount, the selling price is 1,400 yen. What is the original price?"

Miyu read the problem.

Then, she immediately looked at Misaki.

Misaki's shoulders moved.

Just like always,

"First, what can you figure out?"

Mitsuhashi also realized that he had been about to say that.

However, Misaki did not say it.

Oyama said to Miyu.

"Don't look at the teacher. Look at the problem."

Miyu flinched.

Misaki leaned forward instinctively.

Oyama said without looking at Misaki.

"Don't help her yet."

Misaki stopped.

Miyu looked at the problem.

One minute.

The sounds in the classroom sounded louder than usual.

The sound of a middle school student reading English words at the next desk. The sound of a red pen cap closing. The sound of someone's chair scraping against the floor.

Miyu's pencil did not move.

Two minutes.

Tears began to well up slightly in Miyu's eyes.

Saori started to open her mouth slightly.

Nojima stopped her with his hand.

Three minutes.

Misaki's fingers were trembling under the desk.

Mitsuhashi looked at those hands.

What was Misaki fighting against right now?

Was she trying to help for Miyu's sake?
Was she trying to help her past self?
Was she trying to help herself because she couldn't stand to see a child on the verge of tears?

Oyama said nothing.

Miyu was looking at the problem text.

She was not running away.

Her eyes were wavering.
Her mouth was set tight.
But she was going back and forth over the problem text again and again.

Four minutes.

Miyu said quietly.

"Thirty percent off..."

No one answered.

"Since it's thirty percent off..."

Miyu adjusted her grip on her pencil.

"Seventy percent?"

Misaki's face lit up instantly.

But she still didn't say anything.

Oyama didn't say anything either.

Miyu looked as if she were about to look at Misaki anxiously, but stopped halfway.

And then, she wrote something small in her notebook.

70% 1400 yen

Then, it stopped for a while.

"Ah"

Miyu let out a small voice.

"Kumowada"

No one answered.

Miyu continued while looking at the problem.

"Quantity to compare divided by percentage..."

1400 ÷ 0.7

The pencil moved.

2000

"...Two thousand yen"

That voice was not one of confidence.

But it was not a voice forced by someone else.

Oyama said.

"That's the face right now."

Miyu looked up.

"Eh?"

"You were solving it just now."

Oyama did not praise her any further.

Miyu was stunned for a moment.

Then, she looked at Misaki.

Misaki smiled with a face that looked like she was about to cry.

"Miyu-chan, you solved it."

Miyu looked at her notebook.

There was no checkmark yet.

But that equation was one she had written herself.

Miyu said softly.

"I did it even without the teacher saying anything."

Saori covered her mouth.

Her voice was neither quite joy nor surprise.

Seven: Where Kindness Resides

After the lesson ended, Miyu was a little quieter than usual.

However, she was not gloomy.

She kept looking at her notebook over and over.

She was looking at the one problem she had struggled with herself, rather than the ones that had been marked correct.

"Mom."

"What is it?"

"I'm going to try that last one from today again at home."

Saori looked surprised.

Yes. Shall we give it a try?

But if you don't understand, don't ask right away; think about it for a little bit.

Hearing those words, Misaki lowered her eyes.

Saori bowed deeply toward Misaki.

Teacher, I'm sorry. I thought the reason I could solve the problems when you were beside me was because you were such a good teacher.

No...

Of course, I think that's part of it too. But perhaps I haven't been looking closely at why I can't solve them at home.

Misaki shook her head.

I wasn't looking either.

Her voice was quiet.

Oyama was looking at some kind of handout by the counter.

It was unclear whether he was listening or not.

Mitsuhashi stood next to Misaki.

Misaki-sensei.

Yes?

Earlier, when you waited without helping, it was amazing.

Misaki smiled slightly.

It wasn't amazing. My hands were shaking.

But you waited.

Yes.

Misaki looked at the long desk in the classroom.

A few eraser shavings remained on the seat where Miyu had been sitting. The edge of the problem sheet was slightly lifted off the desk.

"I wanted to be a kind teacher."

"Yes."

"I didn't want to be a scary teacher."

Mitsuhashi listened in silence.

"But I realized today. Maybe I wasn't being a kind teacher, but rather a teacher who wasn't scary."

Mitsuhashi thought about the difference.

A kind teacher. A teacher who isn't scary.

They seem similar, but they are different.

Misaki continued.

"I thought I was helping for Miyu's sake. But in reality, maybe I was just afraid of seeing a child in trouble."

Mitsuhashi couldn't say anything.

At that moment, Oyama said without taking his eyes off the printout.

"You don't have to throw away your kindness."

Misaki turned around.

"Just don't put it in the wrong place."

"The wrong place..."

"Don't place it before you think. Place it after you think."

Oyama returned the printout to the counter.

"Kindness before thinking is an escape. Kindness after thinking is a support."

Misaki slowly swallowed those words.

"Yes."

Oyama looked at Misaki.

"Also, don't deny the teacher who saved you."

Misaki's eyes widened.

"That teacher did what you needed. Today, you just made a mistake in what you did for Miyu-chan. That's all."

That's all.

Oyama said it simply.

But to Misaki, it seemed as though those words had taken a long time to reach her.

8. The Teacher Before Becoming a Teacher

At night, when the number of students in the classroom had dwindled, Mitsuhashi was tidying up Miyu's problem sheets.

Next to the last problem, Miyu's small handwriting remained.

70% 1400 yen
1400 ÷ 0.7 =
2000 yen

The intermediate steps were a little crooked.

But they were the footprints of Miyu walking on her own.

Sho looked at the text for the first time, rather than at Mitsuhashi's face.

Today, Miyu looked at the problem for the first time, rather than at Misaki's face.

Mitsuhashi recalled the movement of their eyes.

The teacher's face.
The mother's face.
The red pen.
The hint.
The circle.

Children see much more than you think.

And teachers, too, see much less than you think.

Misaki was writing today's lesson log inside the counter.

Her usual cute sticky notes were pushed to the edge of the desk.

Her profile looked a little tired.

Yet, it also looked somewhat clear.

Nojima came up next to Mitsuhashi.

How was it?

It's difficult.

What is?

Both being kind and waiting.

Nojima laughed.

That's true.

Mr. Oyama wasn't denying kindness, was he?

Yeah. Though he usually sounds like he's denying it.

Nojima took off his glasses and wiped them with the hem of his knit vest.

But I don't think he's really denying it much. I think he's just separating it.

Separating it?

What the child needs, and what the teacher wants to give.

Mitsuhashi looked at Misaki's back.

Misaki was a kind teacher.

However, today, she did something more difficult than just being a kind teacher.

She stopped the hand that wanted to help.

She doubted, for once, the method that had saved her.

Mitsuhashi thought.

She was not the only one who was a teacher before becoming a teacher.

Misaki-sensei, too, was standing in the place before becoming a teacher today.

Oyama had already gone home.

Beyond the glass door, the night staircase continued on.

Looking at that door, Mitsuhashi remembered Oyama's words.

Kindness before thinking becomes an escape. Kindness after thinking becomes a support.

Mitsuhashi did not yet fully understand that difference.

However, she clearly remembered the characters for '2000 yen' that Miyu had written herself.

Those characters were a little more unreliable than circles, but much stronger than circles.