Building a Body Without Leaving Your Heart Behind ⑤ | Being thin wasn't the answer. What I want to aim for is a body that suits me.

Last time, I wrote about the 300kcal soy milk protein.

If it were just protein, it would be light. But in my case, there were days when adding soy milk helped settle my heart.

That wasn't pampering; it might have been the design I needed to keep going.

This time, I'd like to expand on that a bit and write about the topic of body building itself.

Is being thin the right answer? Is losing weight a success? What exactly is a body that suits me?

Having dieted dozens of times, this is what I finally think now.

☕ What I think now, having dieted many times

I've been on diets many times since I was young.

I've reduced my food intake. I've increased my exercise. I've gone to the gym constantly. I've lost a significant amount of weight. There were times when I looked much slimmer than I do now.

I was certainly thin back then.

Clothes looked good on me. My body felt light. Looking in the mirror might have been easier than it is now.

On the other hand, there were times when I went to the gym a lot and built up solid muscle.

My exercise volume was high, and I think my physique was completely different from what it is now.

So, I'm not someone who has never lost weight, never exercised, or doesn't know the difficulty of building muscle.

I've tried many things.

As a result of trying many things, I've now returned to something very obvious.

Things that don't last,

simply don't last.

That's it.

I said it like it was a big discovery, but
when you put it into words, it's surprisingly obvious.

But it took me quite a long time
to really let this obvious truth sink in.

A pro at taking the long way around!

I can't put it on my resume, but I have plenty of experience.

☕ There was a time when I thought being thin was the answer

I feel like when you're young, it's easy to focus on being thin.

Low body weight.
A thin waist.
Clothes sliding on easily.
Legs looking slender.

Just that alone makes you feel like you've somehow succeeded.

I think I had a time like that, too.

I'm happy when my weight drops.
I feel relieved when the number goes down.
If I'm lighter than yesterday, I think, 'Yes!'

The number on the scale determines my mood for the day.

The scale has basically become a fortune teller.

Today's fortune is minus 0.5kg.
It's a great blessing.

Something like that.

Well, it is a great blessing.

It is, but.

But thinking about it now,
being thin wasn't the answer to everything.

Even if you're thin, it's tough if you're always tired.
Even if you're thin, it's tough if your heart is always on edge.
Even if you're thin, it's tough if you become afraid of eating.
Even if you're thin, if it doesn't suit you, it just feels wrong.

As for whether you become happier the smaller the number gets, it's probably not that simple.

Being thin wasn't the answer.

I've finally started to properly realize this recently.

☕ A body with muscle is different from just a thin body

When I was going to the gym, I think I had a body with more muscle rather than just being thin.

Having muscle changes how your body looks, doesn't it?

It changes your posture.
It changes the lines of your clothes.
It changes the vibe when you stand.
Somehow, it gives your body a core.

That was really good in its own way.

Muscle is important after all.

I'm suddenly sounding like a muscle fanatic, but it really is important.

People often say that muscle never betrays you, right?

I'm not quite at that level yet, but at the very least, having muscle makes daily life easier.

Stairs.
Housework.
Shopping.
Taking care of children.
Walking.
Resistance to fatigue.

It all relates to everything.

When you have physical strength, the space in your heart changes too.

I've really been feeling this lately.

As my body starts to move better,
even my feelings when doing housework change a little.

I realized that days when I feel like,
Why is it always me?
are more likely to happen when I don't have enough physical strength.

It's not that my heart is in a bad place;
it's just that my physical battery was flashing red.

If it were a smartphone, I'd charge it right away, but when it comes to myself,
for some reason, I tend to use it until it hits the limit.

We are careless about managing our human batteries.

☕　☕　☕

☕ I think there is such a thing as a body that suits you.

Right now,
rather than just wanting to be thin,
I want to have a body that suits me.

This is where I'm a little different from how I used to be.

Depending on the person,
I think the body that suits them is different.

Our skeletal structures are different.
Our vibes are different.
Our lives are different.
Our ages are different.
The clothes we like are different.
The charm we want to project is different.

That's why,
even if you paste someone else's ideal body onto yourself, it sometimes just doesn't feel right.

I want to be like that person.

I do have those thoughts.

Of course I do.

Like wanting to have a great figure like my Pilates instructor, or wanting to wear workout clothes beautifully—those kinds of feelings are normal.

I have them a lot!

That's not just me trying to sound nice;
I genuinely admire those things.

But ultimately, what I want to aim for
is not a copy of someone else.

My skeletal structure.
My vibe.
My life.
The clothes I like.
The energy I want to project.

A body that fits that.

A body that suits me.

That is what I want to build.

Rather than losing weight, I'm balancing it.

Rather than whittling it down, I'm returning it to its natural state.

Gradually bringing myself closer to a state where my own unique charm can shine through.

For me right now, that way of putting it feels more right.

☕ Your body is made from what you eat. So, how you eat is also important.

When people talk about body building, the image of exercise might be strong.

Of course, exercise is important.

Muscles won't grow if you don't use them.

The body is quite honest about that.

Muscles that aren't used quietly fade away.

Wait a minute. Don't be so modest.

I want to use you.

I think that, but it was me who didn't use them.

Yes.

But the body isn't made just by exercise.

It's made from what you eat.

I've been feeling that a lot lately, too.

Since I started being conscious of protein, I realized, 'Oh, I might have been lacking it until now.'

I also learned that if I skip meals too much, my mood tends to get unstable.

I also learned that while salad chicken and vegetable soup are convenient, there are days when just that isn't enough to satisfy my heart.

I also learned that pumpkin salad with sesame dressing is satisfying for me.

I also learned that soy milk protein isn't just a drink, but a drink that maintains my peace of mind.

Natto, eggs, and rice.
Pumpkin salad with sesame dressing.
Soy milk protein.

As I reviewed these everyday foods, I realized that building a body isn't something you do only with special menus.

How can I combine the foods already in my life
to feel at ease?

What can I eat that satisfies not just my body, but my heart as well?

Looking at these things
was incredibly important for me.

When you start to see what suits you little by little like this, body building stops being a test of endurance.

It's not about finding ways to avoid eating,
but about learning how to eat to properly nourish yourself.

I think this is really important.

Taking care of your body
is also about taking care of how you eat.

I have started to see that little by little.

☕　☕　☕

☕ If it's not a routine you can keep up, you'll eventually go back to your old ways.

After dieting so many times, I've realized that you can push yourself if it's only for a short period.

Temporarily cutting back on meals.
Increasing exercise.
Giving up sweets.
Giving up bread.
Eating out less.

If I set my mind to it,
I can do it to some extent.

However,
if that method doesn't fit your lifestyle,
you will eventually revert.

You revert the moment your motivation runs out.

You revert when you get busy.
You revert when you get sick.
You revert when your mental health drops.
You revert when things at home get difficult.

And when I revert, I end up thinking that I'm a failure again.

But in reality, it might just be that the method didn't fit your lifestyle.

It might not be that you are at fault for not sticking with it, but rather that the design was not sustainable.

This is very important.

I don't think dieting is something you should continue on willpower alone.

Can you fit it into your daily life?
Does it keep your mind at ease?
Does it leave you satisfied after eating?
Can you get back on track even on days when you're tired?
Is there a system in place so that a day you couldn't do it doesn't mean the end?

Including all of this,
is what I think building a body is all about.

It might not be that you are at fault for not being able to continue,
but that the design was not sustainable.

When I think of it that way,
I feel a little more at ease.

☕ I want to graduate from dieting that wears me down

I feel like my old self was trying to lose weight by wearing myself down somewhere along the way.

Suppressing the desire to eat.
Suppressing the desire to rest.
Ignoring the fact that I'm tired.
Telling myself to try harder.

When you do that, you might see temporary changes.

But your heart gets left behind.

Trying to change only the body,
while the heart doesn't follow.

With this, it probably won't last long.

The current me wants to shape things up in a slightly kinder way.

Even if I say kinder,
it doesn't mean doing nothing.

I watch how I eat properly.
I am conscious of protein.
I also exercise.
I go to Pilates.
I move a little at home too.
I also check my weight and calories within the necessary range.

But I won't use that to blame myself.

Look at what I could do today.
Find what works.
Return to center when things fall apart.
Think about the shape that suits me.

I feel like that suits me better right now.

Not to blame myself, but
to build a body that goes to meet myself.

That is the direction I want to go.

☕ A body that suits you might be a body that brings you back to yourself.

What is a body that suits me?

I don't have a clear answer yet, but this is how I feel right now.

It's not a body just for showing to others.

It's not a body just for making the numbers smaller.

A body that is easy to move in.
A body that doesn't get tired easily.
A body that makes me feel a little happy when I wear clothes.
A body that looks healthier than before when I look in the mirror.
A body that makes the thorns in my heart feel a little less sharp when I do chores.
A body that makes me stand a little taller when I go outside.
A body that lets my energy flow properly.

That kind of body.

I think that's different from just losing weight.

A body that brings me back to myself.

That's what it feels like.

Rather than wanting to return to the body I had when I was young,
I want to shape myself into the form where I look my best right now.

The younger me
had the virtues of being young.

But, for the current me,
there must be strengths that are unique to the current me.

I want to properly find those.

I know that sounded a bit like a profound quote all of a sudden, but I truly mean it.

☕　☕　☕

☕ Today's Cafe Le Miracle Summary

I've been on diets many times,
and there were times when I was thin,
times when I gained muscle,
times when I kept it up,
and times when I gained it all back.

Reflecting on all that, what I think now is,
that just being thin wasn't the answer,
at all.

What I want to aim for is,
a body that suits me.

A body that properly radiates my own kind of energy.

And for that,
eating, moving,
resting, and emotional satisfaction,
are all important.

The body is made from what you eat.
Muscles won't grow if you don't use them.
If you leave your heart behind,
it will eventually get sulky.

Really, it's all connected.

That's why I,
instead of a diet that whittles myself away,
want to build a body that brings out the best in me.

Low calories aren't the only answer.
The number on the scale isn't the only measure of success.
Having a body like someone else's isn't the only ideal.

A way of eating that suits me.
A way of moving that suits me.
A body that suits me.
A charm that is uniquely my own.

I want to,
little by little, search for those things.

At Cafe Le Miracle today, too,
the manager is still consulting with her own body.

I think this consultation will continue for a while.

But, it's a little more fun than before.

Not to blame myself, but
building a body to go meet myself.

If I can think of it that way,
the weight of the word 'diet'
feels a little lighter.☕

☕　☕　☕

☕Next, I also want to talk about the Relaxed Wellness Food Club.

Next,
I will write about the Relaxed Wellness Food Club,
where we don't compete over weight.

Trying to get yourself in balance alone
is actually quite hard.

But, places that feel like strict progress report meetings are exhausting.

If so,
why not have a small club where we can pick up on what we've achieved
and balance our minds and bodies together?

That is the story of how I came to think about that.

☕This work is a series article for the Creative Awards 2026 submission.
Subsequent articles will be compiled in this magazine after publication.
I will add them in order so they are easy to read through.

#CreativeAwards2026
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#HSP
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#SelfAcceptance
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#BalancingTheBody
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#ThingsICareAboutInDietManagement
#RelaxedDiet
#DietRecord
#MealRecord
#HealthyHabits
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#CafeLeMiracle