I'm afraid that if I say 'thank you,' it will be our goodbye
It has been three weeks since my father was rushed to the hospital by ambulance.
His initial symptoms would improve, only for something else to go wrong...
Even with that cycle repeating, there is talk of him being discharged around next week, so I am feeling much more relieved.😊
I am grateful to everyone at the hospital who took care of him, and to my father's own vitality.✨
･:*+.･:*+.･:*+.･:*.
This time, when he was rushed to the hospital, I was told,
“Tonight is the critical moment.”
I was told.
“Ah, this is the second time I've heard those words...”
I was told the same thing when it was my husband.
So, this time too, my daughter and I tried doing something, hoping it might work out. (Please ask me about this another time.)
With all that happening, he was moved to a general ward, and
I watched my father lying in bed, looking less energetic than usual.
“When I was little and he doted on me, Dad seemed so much bigger.”
As that thought crossed my mind, scenes of him playing with me when I was a child came flooding back one after another.
He took me to the city pool so many times in the summer.
He even took our family to the big lazy river pool and the seawater pool.
He was so busy with work, yet he made time for us...
Back then, there were no family restaurants or convenience stores, so going out must have been a lot of work.
He also took me to the company summer festival.
I remember they had a Shigeru Matsuzaki show.
We talked about how dark his skin was, even from far away. (I'm sorry.🙏)
There was also a time he had my name engraved on a cherry brooch and gave it to me as a present. That was in winter...
Come to think of it, he even gave me earrings after I became an adult.
Just like when I was little, I really was loved after all...
One by one,
I want to say, “Thank you for that time,” but
As I whisper to my father, who has become smaller than me,
“Remember when this happened?”
recounting these memories, my chest aches.
Tears spill out naturally.
Now that I understand that the things my father did for me were out of love,
I want to express my gratitude, but
“Thank you.”
If I say that, it feels like it will be our final goodbye,
and those words just won't come out...
Meetings and partings are a part of life,
and sometimes, you can suddenly never see someone again.
That is why, no matter how painful it is,
being able to see someone grow old is a blessing,
and having the time and opportunity to express gratitude
is a happy thing...
So, I decided I would tell him properly.
'Thank you for loving me,' I said.
My father nodded slightly,
and kept the rhythm with his left hand, which wasn't paralyzed.
I'm glad it reached him...
But because I end up crying,
there are still so many 'thank yous' I haven't been able to say.
I will tell you them, little by little.
･:*+.･:*+.･:*+.･:*.
I hope that those affected by the earthquake in Kumamoto can return to their normal lives as soon as possible.
Please let me introduce this article.
Thank you for reading until the end today as well🌸
Have a wonderful weekend𓂃 𓈒𓏸𓈒꙳🍀✨