One-Sheet Reading #19 | For those who hate the 'you can do it if you try' mindset | Finding another way to define 'I did it'
▌SUMMARY: Summary
The spread-out roots can grasp various aspects of many different things.
This could be learning from a book,
or introspection over a delicious cup of coffee.
Even fallen fruit is not a failure,
but perhaps it can become nourishment for the next success.
By using these as fuel,
you can flexibly extend your branches and leaves,
and I believe you can carefully nurture the feeling of moving toward
the next sweet and delicious 'achievement'.
▌BOOK: Book Read
Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
Author: Carol S. Dweck
▌NOTE: Insights
▶ Today, I envy the dog again
It's sudden, but there are times when I look at my dog
and feel envious.
Eating, sleeping, playing.
If I could express my desires as honestly as that,
I think it would be so much fun.
But I don't always feel that way; when work is finished and I feel refreshed,
I sometimes feel a slight sense of superiority over the dog instead.
'You look happy too, but I'm going to
eat snacks and watch a movie now'
...is how it goes.
I always feel envious whenever
I am facing something unpleasant myself.
Troublesome work, approaching deadlines,
presentations I have to give in front of many people.
I often think about how many 'unpleasant things'
come rushing at me every day.
'Having things to do is a form of happiness'
I understand that in my head, there is some truth to that.
Whether it is truly something I 'should do'
or something I 'could run away from'
is something no one can really know, but regardless,
I am in a desperate, inescapable situation
where it is right in front of me as something
'I must do'.
In my case, that intense feeling manifests as an escapist
desire to envy the dog.
Nevertheless, because I want to become 'capable,'
I read how-to books like everyone else.
I'm happy when I finish what I need to do,
and I gain a little bit of confidence.
But the figures of people who 'can do it' are so dazzling,
my own 'can do it' fades away,
and it feels like I'm running a long-distance marathon
that never reaches the finish line...
Sometimes I am struck by that feeling.
This situation, where I intend to struggle but
see no change, is
actually very painful.
I have repeated these ups and downs
many times until now.
▶ Your 'I did it' is yours alone
In those days of struggling,
I encountered the concepts of behavioral psychology and success psychology,
and I realized something.
That is,
"I did it" is not just one thing,
that is.
This book refers to this way of thinking
as a "mindset".
The definition of mindset is
"the underlying thoughts and beliefs
about one's own abilities and growth"
,but
in short,I understand it as the idea that
only you can truly savor your own "I did it"
moments.
When compared to others,
others' "I did it" moments
are easily seen as major results.
They look more impressive than your own "I did it" moments.
But, beneath your own "I did it" moments,
there are always countless small "I did it" moments that exist.
By finding those countless small "I did it" moments,
which can also be called the process leading to a result,
you can evaluate things subjectively based on your own standards,
without being dragged down only by the brilliance or results of others.
For example, even if the homemade sweets you made are misshapen,
"the taste was good" or "the baking was just right"
—those are the small feelings of accomplishment in the process.
The yardstick for finding those moments
doesn't have to be others' evaluations; your own sense is fine...
or rather, since you are the only one who can
fully savor those "I did it" moments,
it is fine to use your own standards.
▶ For the day when "I have to" becomes "I want to"
By starting to look not just at the results
but also at the process in that way,
the weight of "I have to do this"
will change little by little.
Feelings like "What if I try this?" or
"I want to try this"
naturally, little by little,
I feel like I am getting closer to them.
In that way, like the single image at the beginning,
by noticing the small "I did it" moments, or the "process,"
you won't be dragged down only by failures at first glance,
and at the very least, you can "slowly and steadily"
nurture the feeling of moving toward "achievement."
I think now that this might be
the gateway to living flexibly.
Your own unique "success"
is surely to be found around there.
▌Q&A: Questions for this book
WHY: Why is a mindset important?
Because if you get too dragged down by failure, you fall into self-denial
Because if you are too obsessed with results, you become afraid of failure and cannot move
Because if you only look at success, you miss opportunities for growth
WHAT: What are the key points when adopting this mindset?
Having the flexibility to see failure as not being a negation of self
Evaluating the value of success and failure based on your own standards
Accepting change and being willing to change yourself
HOW: What happens when you do that?
You gain new insights, seeing failure as a step toward success
You can evaluate your own growth and feel it for yourself
You understand what you want to do and become able to make your own decisions
[Summary of Questions]
Comparing yourself to others is painful, but your 'I did it' belongs only to you
By focusing on small achievements in the process rather than the result, you develop your own core
'I have to do it' will eventually turn into 'I want to do it'
Thank you so much for reading this far.
Thank you very much.
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