[Children's Study Spaces Part 4] "I want to try it on my own": The desire for a base of her own that has sprouted in my 8-year-old daughter

As usual, my eldest daughter was doing her homework at the dining table in the living room when she suddenly looked up and said this to me.

"Hey, Mom. From now on, would it be okay if I tried studying in my room?"

At those words, I felt a slight sting in my heart for a moment. Even though she had always said, "I like being where Mom is." For our family, where living room learning had become completely established, it was a suggestion that carried a slightly lonely ring. But that loneliness quickly turned into a warm feeling as I realized my daughter was growing up. Oh, she is starting to build her own world little by little, I thought. 😌

It is said that as children approach adolescence, it is a very natural developmental process for them to seek privacy and a "place of their own." It is not so much that they want to hide something from their parents, but rather an essential step for them to face themselves and grow as independent individuals. Various studies suggest that having this "spatial autonomy" plays a very important role in fostering self-esteem.

My 8-year-old daughter probably isn't thinking that deeply about it. It might just be for simpler reasons, like "my younger sister is too noisy in the living room and I can't concentrate" or "the sound of the TV bothers me." But I felt that the very sprouting of that desire to "choose my own environment" and "try to finish things on my own" is proof of significant growth.

"Of course! Go ahead and try it. But if you get stuck or feel lonely, you can come back to the living room anytime."

When I told her that, she happily said, "Okay!" and headed to her room with her study set. It felt like sending her off on her first errand—a mix of excitement and nervousness. The living room is a little quieter now, and I have mixed feelings—part of me is happy, and part of me is lonely. 😂

For this new departure in a "place of her own," she needs a desk and chair that will continue to watch over her growth. Since they will be her study companions for many years to come, I want to choose them carefully. It also serves as a silent message of support from a parent, saying, "I value your space." 👇

After a while, I peeked into her room and saw my daughter working on her workbook with a serious expression on her face. Is it just a parent's bias that her back looks a little bigger than usual? Seeing that, I realized once again that studying in her own room has the important meaning of not only improving concentration but also fostering self-management skills. Managing her own studies in a "space of her own." This accumulation of small successful experiences will surely support my daughter in the future.

Of course, it's not all good. Since it's harder for parents to keep an eye on things, it's also true that I worry about whether she is actually studying or if she is reaching for her tablet or manga. It seems that this requires a different dimension of involvement, moving from the support of "watching over her right next to me" to "trusting her while keeping a casual eye on things."

Building the foundation of study habits through living room learning, and then fostering autonomy in her own room. Perhaps the transition of study locations is a mirror that reflects the child's growth itself.

So, in the end, which is better: the "living room" or the "child's room"?

Look forward to the next installment!