Middle School Entrance Exam: A Father's Involvement | Getting into a Top-Tier School Without Saying 'Study'. Everything I Did Over 4 Years

For four years, I never once said, 'Study.'

Weekend drop-offs and pickups, and conversations at key milestones. That was it. I left grade management, communication with the cram school, and daily scheduling entirely to my wife or my son himself.

Even so, he was accepted into a top-tier school.

I wrote this article for fathers who feel, 'I'm too busy with work to be properly involved in the entrance exam process.'I wrote this article for you.

Our Family's Basic Division of Roles

The secret to getting through four years of exam preparation while busy with work was, 'not trying to grasp everything.'

In our home, by clearly dividing roles between parent and child, I was able to reserve my 'mental memory' for work and important decisions.

• Son (the student): Grading, managing study schedules
  ➤ To foster autonomy by 'taking responsibility for what he decided himself.'

• Wife (mother): Drop-offs/pickups, monitoring daily status, coordinating with the cram school
  ➤ Her role was to be a 'safe shelter,' providing comprehensive emotional support.

• Me (father): Weekend drop-offs/pickups, milestone conversations, deciding major policies
  ➤ I left the fine-grained management to them and obtained information indirectly from my wife, allowing me to focus on making calm decisions.

Our Family's Educational Policy: Never Once Saying 'Study'

There was one core principle in our home that never wavered for four years.

Middle school entrance exams are about the child; they are not something the parent should 'make' them do.

Because I communicated this stance, my son managed his own schedule and developed the strength to bounce back on his own even when he hit a wall.

The Trial of the Autumn of 6th Grade and What the Results Taught Us

His deviation scores, which had been steady, plummeted temporarily when he entered the autumn of 6th grade. With NN Kaisei assignments, past exams, and regular classes all piling up at once, his days were spent just trying to keep up. Honestly, I was also anxious, wondering, 'Will he be okay like this?'

In February, he was not accepted into his first-choice school.

When my son heard the result, he burst into tears. Seeing that, my wife cried too. I was thinking only of staying calm, at least in front of the two of them.

But, he had been accepted into another top-tier school.

After talking with my wife later, we settled on the idea that 'our son's curiosity and what the school was looking for just happened to align.' I believe his obsession with his first-choice school blossomed in a different way.

Summary: The Courage to Trust and Delegate to Your Child

I know some of you feel that 'because I have a job, it's difficult to support exam preparation.' But even if parents don't carry the entire burden, children have the power to grow on their own.

1. Child's Independence: Let them handle grading and schedule management to foster a sense of responsibility

2. Mother's Role: Focus on daily care as a source of emotional support

3. Father's Role: Take a step back and focus on key conversations and major policy decisions

Looking back, I realize that parents 'doing everything for them' is not necessarily in the child's best interest.

There were times I felt guilty for being too busy with work to be involved. But now, I think that 'step-back distance' was actually better. Because I got to see many moments where my son thought for himself, decided for himself, and recovered on his own.

Children grow up just fine. My son taught me that.

Information about my paid magazine.

I wrote about 'trusting and delegating to my son.' But it wasn't always easy.
November, when his grades suddenly dropped. The days I spent tracking his scores in Excel.
And the night my son decided his own path—.
I have compiled 'how a father who decided to delegate actually acted' into 8 stories covering 4 years.

📕 'Getting into a Top-Tier School Without Saying "Study". A 4-Year Record of a Father Running Alongside His Son'
8 stories in total, ¥300 each. ¥980 for the bundle (a ¥2,400 value if bought separately).

'In the end, what can I, as a father, actually do?'
If you've ever thought that, please take a look 🕊

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This is an essay-style piece about my son's state of mind right after finishing his middle school entrance exams.