[Episode 2] The Day I Felt Lost as a Mother | The Day I Reached My Limit at the Parent-Teacher Meeting

At the parent-teacher meeting, I couldn't stop my tears.

Even though everyone around me was laughing,
I was the only one who couldn't breathe properly.

“Why is it only my child...”
I was filled with that feeling.

—

When the cherry blossom season ended,
and the fresh green leaves began to look dazzling.

There was a parent-child field trip at the kindergarten.

Even though we were having fun at first,
my child got an upset stomach halfway through, and we had to leave early.

Even though the other children were fine,
why couldn't my child do the same?

That thought remained in my heart.

—

Not long after that,
was the first classroom observation day and parent-teacher meeting.

In a group setting,
my child struggles to follow instructions.

“Will they be okay today?”
While holding onto that anxiety,
I just waited for the time to pass.

—

The observation was a craft activity.

But rather than thinking, “You did a good job,”

I kept thinking,
“Everyone else is doing it,”

“Why is my child...”

Those feelings were all that remained.
I felt like the eyes around me
were watching my child's “inability,”

and my chest tightened.

—

And then, the parent-teacher meeting.
As we went around introducing ourselves one by one,

my turn came.

—
Before I knew it,

I was apologizing.
Everything that had happened until now flashed through my mind,
and before I could find the words,

my emotions overflowed.

—

—At that moment

I couldn't stop my tears.

—
Feelings of regret,
shame,

and not knowing what to do.
Various emotions mixed together,

and they just overflowed.

—

I might have ruined the atmosphere of the meeting.
Just as I was thinking that,

the teacher spoke to me quietly.

—

“This is a time when children grow through arguments.
Seeing you apologize,

the children will learn from it too.”

—
With those words,

the tension in my shoulders eased just a little.

—
After the meeting,

one mother spoke to me.
“You know, when my older child was in this class,

I cried at the parent-teacher meeting too.”
At those words,
I felt like the things that had been so tightly wound up

had loosened just a little.

—

And the next day.

I consulted with the teacher.
About not knowing how to interact with my child.

About being worried about how to handle things.

—
Then the teacher

suggested this:

“It might be a good idea to consult with a specialized agency once.”

—
I
contacted the local health center,

and made an appointment.

—
That day,

the reason I couldn't stop crying was—
I think,

I had reached my limit.

—
But because that happened,


I was able to take a step forward.
And after this,

I would go to a “developmental consultation.”
Honestly,

I was scared to go.
“What if they tell me something I don't want to hear?”

I had that feeling the whole time.
But—
The me of that day

could no longer stand still.
I will write about that day

in the next article.👉Episode 3: The Day I Felt Lost as a Mother | Until I Went to a Child Developmental Consultation | A Step Decided While Feeling Lost

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