To Those Cursed by Excitement
#Free-formHaiku
I previously posted an article about Seiko Oomori's Imitation Girl. At that time, I noted that I wanted to write my thoughts on "Wizards Die Twice" someday.
This time, I am keeping my word and, for the first time in a while, I intend to write down some rambling thoughts.
If you would like, please take a look at that as well; you will likely get a sense of the worldview of the poems I create. Of course, there is absolutely no problem with reading this work first.
People who create something are all equally and terribly possessed by that "something".
It could be painting, music, or writing. Regardless, everyone who needs self-expression loves the object of their expression from the bottom of their heart, and is cursed by it.
In the song, magic is described as "something that is of no use," and those who create are called "wizards." I think that is exactly right. No matter how much of your soul you carve out to create something, in the end, it is impossible to save anyone. No matter how wonderful the technique you use, it is ultimately nothing more than junk.
Even if you wish to make the world a better place with this work, nothing much will change. Yet, we continue to endlessly create useless things. The world calls such beings creators. With both awe and contempt.
The income from creative work these days is exceptionally low. Surely that is because its importance is not as high as other professions. The way we obsess over things that make no difference whether they exist or not must look quite comical.
Furthermore, only a handful of creators are recognized by society. It is now nearly impossible to establish a status above a certain level through individual ability alone. It is the fate of a creator to be forced to continue creating even if their value is not recognized by those around them.
It is not by anyone else. You yourself wish to continue creating, and you are trapped by the works you have produced. It is, so to speak, an act of strangling yourself.
Once you become a creator, you can never return to being the person you were before. That anguish is expressed in the song as "I wish I had never become a wizard." It is an excellent way of putting it, beyond which there is nothing more.
"I wish everything I thought was a lie"
I think this is a worry unique to Seiko-chan. Boasting overwhelming fame, her own inner self is being peered into by an indefinite number of people. It is listened to by many, especially people like us who harbor suicidal ideation.
If things go poorly, there might even be people who have ended their lives while listening to her songs. There might even be people who have made the "lies" mentioned in her songs a reality. That is precisely why I suspect she has mixed the "suffering unique to famous creators" into lyrics that sing of the "suffering of those who create things."
This is merely my imagination, but while listening to this song, I think about the things mentioned above. And, I am writing this note while feeling a certain kind of resignation that I, too, can never escape the fact that I am cursed by the excitement I have created.