The Gardener of the Sleeping Forest, Episode 11: 'After the Rain - Part 1 / Hana Takamiya'

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Episode 11: 'After the Rain (Part 1)'

'About the barre, from first position'

My mother's voice echoed through the studio, and the backs of the students in leotards, hands resting on the barre along the wall, straightened in unison.

The foot position was the basic en dehors. With the heels touching and the feet forming a straight line from the right toe to the left toe, this pose, which beginners struggle with, had become second nature to me by the time I was old enough to remember.

The studio was wrapped in a pleasant tension, and the hands and feet of the children in the junior class followed the same form one after another. And in between, my mother's voice would fly.

'So-and-so, be more conscious of your back.'

'So-and-so, that's good, keep it up.'

I let those words wash over me, repeating the positioning that had become ingrained in my body as a matter of course, while noticing that the corners of my mouth were curling into a smile.

After this, the casting for the recital was to be announced. The junior class would be performing 'The Sleeping Beauty'.

It was also the production I saw when I first watched a full-length ballet performed by a professional company.

The fairies performing delicate and beautiful dances one after another, and the mysterious yet comical evil spirit, Carabosse. The nail-biting, tense scenes continued, and the finale was a festive wedding celebration. And then, the breathtaking grand pas de deux of Princess Aurora and Prince Désiré.

The shock I felt as a young child is still burned into my heart, as fresh as ever.

Princess Aurora is the role I have the most emotional attachment to, and it was the variation I danced when I first won an award at a junior ballet competition. Considering the members of this class, I had no doubt that I would be chosen.

However, the one named for the lead role was Azumi Ohashi, who was a year older than me.

At the time, the only two of us in my mother's junior ballet class with award records were me and Azumi, but my award rank was much higher. As soon as the lesson ended and I passed through the door connecting the studio to our home, I protested to my mother, but she looked at me as if I were a nuisance and declared,

'There is no way I can have my own daughter play the lead in my own studio's recital so many times. You should be able to understand that much without me having to say it.'

The reason I couldn't play Princess Aurora wasn't due to any lack of ability on my part at eleven years old; the cause actually lay with my mother, yet the frustration and sadness I felt so unfairly were dismissed by the very person who caused them.

Adults have their own reasons, I suppose. The outcome should have been the same regardless. But back then, I desperately wanted my mother to listen to what was in my heart as her daughter, and to truly clash with me as parent and child. I must have brought it up with a desperate hope, thinking that since ballet was the only place where my mother looked at me, maybe she would listen.

I wish all of these memories, the emotions I felt back then, my expectations and attachment to my mother, and even the version of myself that is calmly analyzing this right now, would all just disappear.

Whenever I feel like I'm about to be dragged into a black swamp like this, I always hear Chihaya's voice.

"Hana, are you feeling down again? Are you okay?"

Chihaya is always my greatest ally. As long as Chihaya is here, I'm sure I'll be fine.

Even if people laugh at me and say I'm crazy, and even if I lose something else precious in the process.

.....

Lately, I've been so unstable that even I have to laugh at myself.

Even though I was the one who ended things, I find myself crying when I think of Takatora-san, and I've been getting through the days by taking my turbulent emotions out on my work. I've been talking so openly to Chihaya that I even accidentally forgot that Gin-chan was there, but the fact that Gin-chan didn't even react was reassuring. That's right, I'm going to live alone from now on anyway, so I even started searching for how to write a will, thinking that if I were to suddenly be hit by a car and pass away, I would want to leave all my savings to this child.

While living days like that, on a night when I had a nightcap—something I usually try to avoid—a certain person who has been quietly troubling me for a long time crossed my mind.

My ex-boyfriend, Akama, whom I broke up with three years ago. He is a man I cannot understand at all, who periodically sends me threatening messages demanding that we get back together and apologizing, even though I haven't replied to him once.

When I consulted Azumi-chan about it before, she gave me advice with the face of a doctor.

She said that if there is no actual harm, it is better not to carelessly block messages from such people. Even if it is one-sided, by sending messages, they are somehow letting off steam, and there have been quite a few cases where, if that is suddenly cut off, they go out of control and it develops into an incident. She emphasized that the basic rule is to completely ignore them and be very careful not to react or provoke them.

And then, with the preface that "this is as a friend," she said this in a tone stricter than usual.

"If that guy ever appears in front of you, run with all your might. If he knows where you live, you have to think that the only way to truly escape is to move. You might think I'm exaggerating, but please, remember what I said."

I was supposed to have taken that to heart, but I ended up messing up.

"It's disgusting, seriously. Don't ever contact me again for the rest of your life!!"

I sent my first reply in three years and thoroughly blocked him on every contact method of mine that he might know.

In other words, I had completely cut off the vent for a dangerous person's frustrations. And I had done so after provoking them to the fullest.

The next morning, once I had calmed down, I blamed myself, but fortunately, I had moved immediately after breaking up with Akama. I had also quit my job, so I wasn't even going to my old workplace. The chances of being confronted were slim to none.

I breathed a sigh of relief, and out of joy at being freed from three years of pent-up frustration, I instinctively raised my fist and cheered alone, only to find Gin-chan's beautiful eyes staring coldly at me through the gap in the door.

And then, last night. It happened when I was on my way home, still immersed in the lingering excitement of enjoying 'The Nutcracker' at the New National Theatre, and had just gotten off the train.

On the station stairs, I accidentally remembered, 'Oh, this is where Takatora-san helped me,' and my vision blurred with tears. With a handkerchief in one hand, I walked the night road to my home, which could hardly be called close to the station.

Just as I stepped onto the apartment grounds, I received a call. It was Gin-chan.

'You're not home yet? I got here first.'

'Ah, right, you don't have a key. I'm right in front of the place now, so just wait by the door.'

Immediately after I said that, I heard a clear clicking of a tongue right behind me, followed by the sound of footsteps running away. I instinctively turned around and saw the back of a man in a stainless-collar coat with a backpack on, turning the corner while being illuminated by a streetlamp.

Even if it were just a neighbor, the distance at which I heard the tongue-clicking was clearly unnatural. And why would they run away like that in the first place?

---Was I being followed? A sex offender targeting a woman living alone, or a burglar? Because I had been sniffling and crying, I hadn't noticed at all. They must have spotted me because they thought I was vulnerable.

My legs tangled from fear, and I desperately made my way toward Gin-chan. The moment the tall, nine-head-tall figure standing in front of the entrance came into view, I felt relieved from the bottom of my heart. Gin-chan seemed to notice that something was wrong with me, but since I had been acting strange lately anyway, he didn't ask me anything in particular. As for me, I wanted to lie down and feel safe as soon as possible, so I put off talking about the crisis that had just occurred until tomorrow.

'Aren't you going for a walk? I was thinking of going with you today.'

The next morning, Gin-chan, who had woken up earlier than me, was in his jersey and unusually offered to accompany me on my walk.

I had thought about it all night and realized the possibility that the person last night was Akama. It was just his back, but his build and aura seemed similar.

And it was a tradition from when we were dating that I would go see The Nutcracker on Christmas Eve. Out of 365 days, last night was the perfect chance for him to ambush me. If it really was Akama, it means he had been following me from the theater. No matter how you look at it, this is not normal.

'...I'm still deciding whether to go for a walk. Hey, you're leaving tomorrow, right?'

'Yeah. I'm planning to leave here tomorrow afternoon and catch a flight to Fukuoka.'

What terrible timing. I can't rely on my parents' home, and it's physically impossible to stay at Azumi-chan's place. If I explain the situation to Aunt Shoko, I'm sure she'll take me in. I'll stay there for a while, and in the meantime, I'll look for a new place to live...

---Am I going to say goodbye to this town?

Gin-chan. Let's go for a walk. It's a huge help that you're coming with me. I'll explain the situation while we walk, but please keep an eye out for any suspicious people just in case.

Even if they had identified where I live, Akama is just an ordinary office worker. It's highly unlikely he would come back again so early on a weekday morning, and now that I'm with Gin-chan, this is my chance to get out.

Before I leave this place, I want to see it properly one more time. This town I love so much, filled with treasure-like memories of that person.

The eastern sky is faintly whitening, and the morning is chasing away the night. This is the moment I love this town the most.

When I leave the residential area and step into the park, the sight of ducks floating on the large pond catches my eye. As I walk along the pond counting the waterfowl, I eventually enter the promenade. The carpet of autumn leaves has disappeared, and the air, now fully winter-like, wraps around me.

Along the way, I explained to Gin-chan what happened last night and the possibility that the person was Akama. When I finished my story, Gin-chan stopped walking and said with an unusually serious expression,

Let's go to the police. Right now, immediately after this.

There hasn't been any actual harm done, and I'm not even certain it was Akama. I'm not sure if they'd even take me seriously at this stage...

If it was Mr. Akama, I'm worried about you, Hana, and even if it was someone else, I'm still worried about you. Besides, if you were targeted just by chance, it's possible other women could be victimized, so isn't it important to report information about a suspicious person?

Indeed, that is true. Oh, Gin-chan, you've really grown up.

I recalled the sight of him in his school backpack when he started elementary school, clinging to me—a middle schooler—and crying because he wanted to go to school with me, and I fell into deep reflection all by myself.

I understand, let's go to the police. But before that, there's a convenience store I want to see. I'm not going to stop at the shop, I just want to look at it from a distance. Please, just let me do that.

As I said that and started walking along the promenade again, Gin-chan walked beside me, looking puzzled as he said, 'I don't mind, but,' and continued the conversation while we walked.

I'm going to cancel my work and stay with you for a while, Hana.

It was said so casually that I doubted my own ears.

You're going to leave a hole in the performance!?

Gin-chan's main demand is, in the first place, to fill empty seats. Because there aren't enough male dancers, or because there are roles that cannot be performed technically even if there are enough men, the other party pays a fee that is by no means cheap, plus travel and accommodation expenses.

If he cancels this close to the date, he'll likely have to pay a penalty, and for Gin-chan, who works as a freelancer, losing his reputation would be fatal.

Above all, I don't know the details of this job, but regardless of whether they are professionals or amateurs, what will happen to the stage that not only the ballet dancers, but everyone involved has worked so hard to create through their own dedicated efforts?

The beautiful face that looked up in surprise was, at first glance, the usual poker face, but the slightly darting eyes betrayed that she could not hide her agitation.

Gin-chan only knew how to dance, and whether in ballet or elsewhere, he could never fit into any group. However, his talent and his love for ballet are genuine. Just the thought of ruining someone else's stage and potentially being unable to dance again is enough to make his legs tremble.

Go to work. You absolutely cannot cancel. You want to go, don't you, Gin-chan?

It's dangerous to go alone. I can carry Hana easily. You should evacuate somewhere far away, or if that's not possible, at least have a man with you.

I plan to contact Aunt Shoko later. I'll stay at your parents' house for a while. I'll be fine, so please go and dance with all your might.

I tried to persuade him in a tone as gentle as when I used to soothe him when he was still a small child. However, the reality that came back was a letdown.

My parents are traveling in Taiwan, so they're away. And while I'm at it, I don't have the key to my parents' house.

As I stopped in my tracks, Gin-chan looked at me with a pained expression and started to say, 'I knew it,' when suddenly...

Good morning!!

Without knowing if the words were directed at me, I reflexively turned toward the voice, and under the trees of the promenade, I saw the slanted eyes I had been picturing in my heart all along. Contrary to his loud greeting, he looked tense and was touching his left ear for some reason. His work clothes, with the morning sun at his back, were dazzling.

---Why?

As if answering the voice in my heart, Gin-chan said,

Sorry, I intended to tell you beforehand, but I didn't have the chance. Azumi-chan said that the two of you should talk properly at least once. So, I told her we would pass through this park during our walk. On the condition that I accompany you today. I'm really sorry for doing this on my own.

Gin-chan explained to me in a hurried tone and then ran over to Takatora-san. His uncharacteristic panic made me realize that the situation surrounding me was indeed an emergency.

I'm sorry, Mr. Muromi. We have to go to the police station now.

I didn't want to see Takatora-san. I was in the middle of trying to move on, soothing these uncontrollable emotions all by myself.

---But, I wanted to see your face so badly.

As I struggled to keep my eyes from tearing up again, Takatora-san's expression turned stern the moment he heard the unsettling word 'police'.

What happened!?

"Hana is in trouble!! You need to protect her with that gorilla-like chest of yours!!"

Takatora-san burst out laughing at those words, delivered by Gin-chan with a serious face. Laugh lines spread from the corners of his eyes, and his fierce expression crumbled in an instant.

Oh, to be able to see this smile, which I thought I would never see again. Thank you, Santa, for this irreplaceable Christmas present.

After that, Gin-chan and Takatora-san started making plans together, leaving me completely out of the loop.

"My work finishes three nights from now, but since the city center and the airport are close in Fukuoka, I plan to slide onto the last flight."

Hearing Gin-chan's words, Takatora-san said, "The time has come to repay eighteen years of debt," and made a phone call to someone. After arguing quite a bit with the person on the other end, he forcefully ended the conversation and said with a feigned innocence, "It just so happens I had a half-day starting tomorrow afternoon and two full days free."

"Hana, stay with Muro-san until I get back. That's a promise."

Seeing me looking bewildered, Takatora-san touched his left ear and made a complicated face. No, it's not that I dislike you. That's exactly why I don't want you to be any kinder to me. Because when we part ways again, it will surely be too painful to bear.

"What are you hesitating for? In a situation like this, just listen to what I say, okay? Chihaya-san doesn't have a physical form, so he can't protect you physically, can he?"

---Oh, no matter how mature he seems, Gin-chan is still Gin-chan after all.

Having such a delicate topic brought up right in front of Takatora-san made me feel like I'd been ambushed. I would rather have fainted right then and there. As I was trying to escape reality by letting my consciousness drift into space, a sudden "Ah!!" rang out.

The owner of the voice was Takatora-san.

"I finally get it. Could it be that you had another man you liked, Hana-san, and you were hiding it from me because you couldn't tell me... In other words, an imaginary friend?"

An imaginary friend. A fantasy friend seen mainly during school age. In fact, Azumi-chan had also told me that Chihaya was like an extension of that, and if he was a necessary existence for me, I didn't need to undergo treatment.

And Takatora-san, looking genuinely relieved, said it as if it were nothing.

"What, is that all it is? My nephew, one year younger than Murasaki, had one too. I don't know much about the technical side of things, but it's a very important existence to the person themselves, right? Sorry for the weird misunderstanding."

The existence of Chihaya, which had been denied over and over by my ex-lovers, including Akama. The shock of having it accepted so easily, combined with the intense tension that had been building since last night, caused me to cry out loud like a small child in the early morning park.

The two grown men, flustered but full of affection, comforted me, a thirty-six-year-old woman, in that state.

...

That night, Gin-chan, who usually lies down in the living room, insisted that he was worried and slept under my bed, his breathing steady. Wrapped completely in a sleeping bag with only his face exposed, his sleeping figure—which should have looked comical—was still beautiful nonetheless.

Falling asleep enveloped in the scent of Gin-chan-colored roses, I had a strange dream.

In the dream, I was Princess Aurora, waking up from a hundred-year sleep feeling truly refreshed, and I headed to the window with a brisk step.

Even though Princess Aurora had awakened, perhaps Carabosse's curse hadn't been completely broken, as the thorns around the castle hadn't disappeared. However, those thorns weren't violently covering the castle; they had been neatly trimmed and perfectly groomed.

As I leaned out the window in my dress, my eyes caught sight of the many roses blooming in the courtyard, and a man with a sturdy build.

He wasn't a prince on a white horse, but a gardener carrying a folded ladder and wielding large shears. Looking as if he had just finished his work, he gazed up at the castle with a happy expression, his lovely laugh lines showing.

To be continued in the final episode, 'After the Rain (Part 2)'
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