Wait? Am I in a 'dead end' in life before I knew it?! Small preparations you can make now will save you.

Hello, this is dai-fuku.
I have been working at an advertising agency in Tokyo for 27 years. I am currently 49 years old.
I am a so-called 'around-fifty' office worker.

A 'single sense of discomfort' that remained in my heart on a night I drank with a comrade-in-arms

The other day, I went out for drinks with a female colleague whom I could call a comrade-in-arms of 20 years.
She is a person who is a lump of passion, honest, serious, and

the type who throws her whole body into
the work she is entrusted with.
In the field of sales, she is also a partner with whom I have

gone through many critical situations together.
Such a woman is now

entrusted as the leader for a huge client.
The pressure, the expectations from the executives, the daily demands.
What came out of her mouth were

words that resembled loneliness.

However, as I listened to her talk slowly,
her 'true priorities' gradually became visible.

It was time with her husband, who is over 15 years her senior.

While being swept away by work,
somewhere in her heart, she thinks, 'I want to cherish the time we spend together.'
However, the 'margin' to face that wish
was overwhelmingly lacking for her.

◎ The impression that she was in a dead end before she knew it

For the past 20 years, she has
continued to respond with all her might to the missions given to her.
That sincerity is straightforward and worthy of respect.

But on the other hand,

There were moments when I thought that she had hardly been able to take this kind of 'margin for trial and error'.

In the words she spoke at the drinking party this time,
it was as if
'I was standing in a dead end before I knew it'
it had that kind of ring to it.

If you keep running without any margin, you might not know where the entrance to redefinition is.

◎ Redefinition is not a flash of inspiration, but a 'buildup'

There is something I keenly feel now that I am around fifty.
That is,
to redefine life, you need 'time' and 'margin for thought'.

The accumulation of past experiences and values,
the trial and error repeated many times,
'time for thought' to peek a little into your own future.

Only with this kind of 'buildup',
'How can I reconstruct my own life?'
you become able to face the question.

That is why, while watching her, what I felt was,
while the 20 years of running with all my might to fulfill responsibilities are truly something to be proud of,
perhaps behind that sincerity, the 'margin for redefinition' had been whittled away.

I think I was 'preparing for redefinition' a little early

On the other hand, looking back at myself,
from my early 40s, I had a vague sense of crisis, wondering, 'What will happen if I enter my 50s like this?'

I became interested in side jobs and second careers,
taking stock of my work, and
gradually rearranging my life's priorities.

It is not something that can be called a strategy.
It was just a feeling of 'wanting to get ahead of things'.

But as a result,
I feel that this buildup is leading to my current 'freedom of re-editing'.

⸻

Around fifty is the turning point of 'whether you can redefine yourself'

You don't need to be forced to make big choices.
You don't need to change your life dramatically.

However, around fifty is certainly,
'How can I reuse my values up to now?'
I think it is an age where that is questioned.

And those who can redefine themselves are
those who have built up 'margin' in their daily lives until now.

Conversely,
I think those who have kept running without margin will find that they cannot see the entrance to redefinition before they know it.

This drinking party was
not a story about her, but
'How far has the redefinition of my own life progressed now?'
it became a night to quietly re-question.

See you next time

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