How to be happy: 'Letting go of the assumption that you are right'

The top image is an 'Allium'.
Its flower language is 'correct assertion'.

It is said that this flower language
comes from its straight-growing stem.

Brandishing 'correct' arguments.
As this phrase suggests,
always making the 'correct' argument
is not necessarily the right thing to do.

I have been thinking about such correct assertions and happiness.

'That person is wrong.'
From the moment I thought that,
I was moving away from happiness.

Of course, sometimes they really are wrong.
But the stronger the assumption that 'the other person is wrong and I am right' becomes,
the less the goal becomes about discussion.
To win.

To make them admit it.
To make them obey.
Before you know it, a power struggle has begun.

The other person doesn't want to lose either.

So they fight back.

They talk back.
They ignore you.
Sometimes, even revenge begins.
Even though it should have been a trivial difference of opinion at first,

in the end, it becomes a battle of 'who is right' and
'who will win'.
At times like that,

I want you to doubt being 'right'.
Is being right really necessary?

When you can think that way,
mysteriously, the number of times you get angry decreases.
Letting go of being right

is not the same as losing.
It is stepping down from the conflict.
If it's a battle where you can't be happy even if you win,

don't participate from the start.
That way, your heart will be much calmer.
If you were right, what is that rightness for?

To defeat the other person?
To prove your own correctness?

Or is it to make someone happy?
Being right is important.
But if it is a correctness that has forgotten its purpose,
I believe that stopping for a moment

can bring you closer to happiness.

Books that influenced me in writing this article

'The Courage to be Disliked' / Ichiro Kishimi, Fumitake Koga

I have lost count of how many times I have introduced this book.
Even so, it is a book I want to introduce again.

What I remembered while writing this article was the concept of a 'power struggle' in Adlerian psychology.
'That person is wrong.'
The moment we think that, we may stop solving problems and start playing a game of deciding who wins and who loses.
And if that battle drags on, it can eventually even develop into revenge.
When I read the book, I realized that 'proving you are right' and 'being happy' are not necessarily the same thing.
Even if you are right, what are you using that rightness for?
It is a book that asks that question no matter how many times I read it. Highly recommended.

I have also compiled other flowers for 'ways to be happy'
at the link below.
Please take as much as you need 🍀

Thank you for reading until the end.
I hope to see you in another article.
🍀 May you be happy 🍀