Q: My child can do it at daycare... but won't try to get dressed by themselves at home

(This childcare Q&A was published in 'Child Health, February 2023 Issue')

Introduction

"Child Health" is a professional journal that supports child health and childcare, delivering useful information to professionals involved with children in every issue.
In the "Childcare Q&A" section of this magazine, we answer questions regarding child health and childcare, primarily through our editorial board members.
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Question

　I have a 4-year-old daughter.
　She has been attending daycare since she was small.
　It seems she gets dressed and eats her meals properly by herself at daycare, but at home, she hardly ever tries to get dressed on her own.
　I try to let her do it herself as much as possible, but when it gets close to the time we need to leave, I end up helping her.
　I am worried that if things continue this way, she will grow up to be someone who relies on others for everything.

Answer

　First of all, it is wonderful that she is able to get dressed and eat properly by herself at daycare, a place away from her family!!

　I think it is amazing that she is working so hard to adapt to that environment.
　Parents should first make sure to tell her that.
　Conversely, I think she is working so hard that the desire to be spoiled at home is bubbling up.
　Also, amidst that desire to be spoiled, at home we tend to repeatedly say "hurry up" due to time constraints, so it is a situation where communication easily gets crossed (I say this with self-reflection, as I am always telling my own children at home to hurry up, hurry up).
　Since she can do it outside, I think the possibility of her becoming someone who relies on others in the future is low, but I think it is good to encourage her in a positive way when there is time at home, and help her realize the joy of completing a mission at home while praising her (I will try my best too).

(Kenta Ito, Department of General Medicine, Aichi Developmental Disability Center)

Conclusion

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