[Borderline Intelligence x Former School Refusal] A Child's Growth Comes Suddenly

Recently, I have really felt my son's growth more and more.

Back when he was refusing to go to school, I was filled with anxiety,
wondering what would become of him in the future.

But now, he shows me so much growth every day that I almost forget those worries.

Lately, my son
takes one day off a week to cool down. Other than that, he goes to school and also attends
after-school day services twice a week. There are even days when he says he wants to go on weekends.

The homework he recently started is also going very smoothly.

He is relearning the fourth-grade material he missed during his three years of school refusal, one step at a time. "I want to try doing homework." "I want to try doing fraction homework."

Apparently, he even asked his teacher for it himself.

He also brings home his English textbook and says, "Teach me English!"

He asks me history quizzes he learned in class; in any case, his chatter never stops every day.

"I want to talk about this, I want to talk about that." That's how our days are.

Honestly, I would love to spend more time listening to his chatter.

However, I am also increasing my work at the after-school day service a little. After all,

when they start going to school every day, parents can work with peace of mind, right?

That said, for me, the after-school day service is more like play
than work. No, a hobby? It's closer to a way to unwind.

The staff are all people I love, too. Playing with the kids in the park and moving my body is good. And, since I get moderately tired, I sleep well at night.

Anyway, rather than staying home all the time, getting out a little to work is better for my health!

Because of that, there are more days when I get home late from work.

But you know, when I get home, the laundry is folded.

Of course, it's my son.

Back when he was refusing to go to school, we did various chores together. Folding the laundry was one of them.

Back then, we had plenty of time.

I didn't want the time he couldn't go to school to be 'time spent doing nothing,' so we worked on acquiring the skills for daily living together.

That accumulation has now become a natural habit for my son.

The time spent in school refusal was not wasted at all.
Because of that time,
my son is who he is today. And I am who I am today.

Lately, I almost never get angry at my son.

I don't really say
'Do this'
or 'Do that' anymore.

Basically, my son
thinks for himself, chooses for himself, and acts for himself.
'I'm tired today.'
'I think I can go today.'
'I want to do this.'
He tells me these things clearly.

I just support those feelings of his.

Yesterday,
he said, 'I want to go to the after-school day service tomorrow, Saturday.'

When I asked him why, it was because his favorite friend invited him, saying, 'Come tomorrow.'

Of course, I support that feeling.
I contacted the after-school day service teacher right away.
And since there was an opening, they added him in.

My son is truly full of motivation right now.
But, it's not that he's trying too hard.
When he's feeling overwhelmed, he clearly tells me, 'I want to rest today.'

That balance is very good.

I hear that 'many children become rebellious when they hit puberty,' but that hasn't happened with my son yet.

His body is getting bigger every day, and
I'm surprised at how fast middle school boys grow physically.

It's only been three months since he started going to school.
The time that stood still during his school refusal felt so long, but...
once things started moving, it's been really fast.

Of course, a day might come when he stops again.

But,
I know now.

Children have their own timing for growth.
So, there's no need to be so impatient.

Children are moving forward more than parents realize.

When my son was withdrawing, I was full of anxiety.

'What if he stays withdrawn like this?'
'Will his future be okay?'

To gradually become a parent who can 'believe and watch over' him, I continued keeping an observation diary.

I have summarized the method and the changes I felt in myself in this paid article.

I am currently exchanging messages individually with people who are actually trying this 'observation diary,' and everyone is interacting with their children in such wonderful ways.

As you continue to write this diary, I am very much looking forward to seeing how your relationship with your child and your perspective on them will change.

I am also very much looking forward to it.

Would you like to start, if you'd like?