I want to live freely, I want to live as myself, a story of a journey of the heart: "Kaoru, 21 - When Traveling with the Wind" Chapter 7: The Road to Adulthood
*The character illustration in the header image is my own work. (Colored pencils)
When everything looked like a fake, the true "freedom" was right in front of me.
"What is an adult?" "What is happiness?" Why not flip the ordinary daily life upside down with Kaoru, who is trying to live freely?
A bright breeze should blow through this week as well, making your heart feel lighter.
Presenting Chapter 7 of "Kaoru, 21 - When Traveling with the Wind".
* Tales / Shosetsuka ni Naro also available!
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🍃Chapter 7🍃
~The Road to Adulthood~
Sunday morning. I woke up near noon. I had been drinking late into the night on Saturday with friends from university.
Chieko, and Ryu-kun, whom she brought along.
The three of us got carried away and drank too much.
The moment I woke up, my head felt like it was splitting.
—— So this is what a "hangover" is. It feels strangely profound.
21 years old. I've experienced a hangover, so I guess I've become an adult.
Unable to bear it, I looked for Bufferin. I crawled on all fours to search for the medicine box. When I took water out of the refrigerator to drink it—, slip. A white pill rolled away.
"Ouch."
Holding my head, I picked up the white pill that had fallen next to the refrigerator and swallowed it.
I lay spread-eagled on the kitchen floor just like that.
The cold flooring felt good.
Chieko is in the same class as me. We ended up on the same train many times and started talking.
She is 174 centimeters tall. Slender, long limbs, quite eye-catching.
She's a bit extreme and doesn't "act like a good girl" in front of her parents.
She doesn't fawn.
She doesn't offer flattery either.
Dressed like a London rocker, she is always the center of attention.
Ryu-kun is an unsuccessful classical violinist.
Since he can't make a living, Chieko supports him. She earns a lot of money working part-time as a model.
Ryu-kun returned from Spain last year. He got a job in an orchestra, but he had zero cooperativeness and was fired.
Now he teaches children, gets invited to friends' recitals, and participates in studio performances. But sometimes he comes home after getting into a fight.
He looks quiet at first glance, but he is always living while fighting silently.
That precariousness seems to be irresistible to Chieko.
Chieko is crazy about Ryu-kun.
"I want to devote myself to him and be worn out."
She says that and laughs.
"Please, go ahead and be worn out."
I said that yesterday while drinking beer.
We drank Spanish beer at a shop Ryu-kun knows.
Estrella Damm, a refreshing taste, truly with the flavor of "barley" and "grain."
"A woman like you wouldn't understand this feeling."
Pushing back her long hair, Chieko smiled at me as if she pitied me.
Beautiful people look good doing anything.
"Are you still modeling for that artist?"
"Yeah."
"Isn't that guy gay?"
"I've thought that before, but it doesn't seem like it. Either way, it doesn't matter to me."
"Maybe you just lack sex appeal."
I stared at the sky and took a sip of my beer.
"What are you going to do once you've saved up that much money?"
Chieko asked, puffing out a cloud of smoke.
"Once I save up 3 million yen, I'm going on a wandering journey. I've told you that many times."
"The guy from high school who went to South America? You're going to chase after him, right?"
I gave Chieko a silent nudge on the head. Ryu-kun just laughed.
"Don't you have a lover right now?"
"I don't really need one."
"How sad. Not having someone to love. Don't you think so, Ryu?"
Ryu-kun smoothed back his hair and looked at me, smiling.
"I don't need one."
"What does that mean?"
"It means I don't need a specific partner."
The two of them peered at me, looking puzzled.
Chieko's eyes lit up as she asked,
"Is it okay if it's someone unspecified?"
She showered me with questions like a machine gun.
I didn't go into detail, but this is what I always think.
You only live once. The world is vast.
So many people are living their lives.
I want to meet them.
I want to meet so many people.
I want to talk, gaze, love, and be loved.
I want to know so many things.
I want to know more and more.
If I know the world, I can see myself.
If I can see myself, I can see other people.
Everyone thinks they know themselves.
But they don't know a thing.
We must recognize that we are ignorant.
"Socratic ignorance"—that is the words of Socrates.
Everyone is just under an illusion.
That is precisely why,
because I am ignorant,
I want to touch many fragments of life.
I don't know anything yet.
That's why I want to touch—
I want to love so many people.
—Continued in Chapter 8—
I will deliver Kaoru's story on the wind every Saturday.
Please enjoy the rest of the journey.
* Tales / Let's Become a Novelist also available!
~All 10 Chapters URL~
Chapter 1 - Prologue "Lies and Freedom"
Chapter 2 - A Million Volts in Silver-Rimmed Glasses
Chapter 3 - Judith in the Mirror
Chapter 4 - 18 Years Old: Comfortable Accomplices
Chapter 5 - 19 Years Old: When the Season Ends
Chapter 6 - Hiroshi on the Stairs
Chapter 7 - The Road to Adulthood
Chapter 8 - "Death" is Right There
Chapter 9 - Souls Meeting Again
Chapter 10 - 21 Years Old, When Traveling with the Wind
~Afterword~ Finishing the Posts-
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~To those who read until the end~
Thank you from the bottom of my heart 😊
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