Even if her memories change, those memories are eternal
When winter comes, memories that feel like a light flickering deep in my chest suddenly emerge.
It is the memory of that winter when I first learned what it meant to experience the happiness of being with someone I love.
During my student days, I was busy with studies, club activities, and part-time jobs, so I never dated anyone.
Because of that, when I got my first girlfriend at the age of 24, I was very happy, and even though it was a long-distance relationship, my days were fulfilling.
In the winter when I was 25, she came to visit me, and we went sightseeing, spent our first night together, stayed at a Japanese inn, and she cooked for me at home; although it was only for a few nights, I felt that the time we spent during that trip was the happiest in my life.
On the last day of the trip, after I saw her off on the bus, I couldn't stop crying from happiness on my way home.
Two years later, I was transferred to the local area where she lived, which I had always hoped for, and I was finally able to go see her whenever I wanted.
“I’m sorry for making you feel lonely
all this time while we were long-distance.
But from now on,
I’ll always be nearby, so it’s okay.”
However, one month after I moved to the local area, she was rushed to the hospital.
One night, she apparently suddenly ran out of the house barefoot and headed toward the road.
She had suddenly lost her mental balance and began to suffer from hallucinations and auditory delusions.
The doctor told me it was schizophrenia.
In fact, when I met her at the hospital, she thought the IV drip in her hand was poison and was forcibly pulling at the needle.
Hey, listen, I heard that doctor talking about putting poison in the IV earlier.
You know, my father is secretly connected to organized crime.
She whispered things like that to me with a straight face.
Since that day, I lost contact with her, and it wasn't until four months later that I was finally able to reach her and meet up.
When I saw her for the first time in a while, she had lost some weight and was calmer than she had been at the hospital, but the memories of the trip we once took together had changed into negative ones, in contrast to my own.
In the end, we decided to break up for each other's sake.
I don't think we will ever see each other again.
The experience of being moved with all my heart and soul while with her during that trip has become a memory that only I remember.
But back then, we were both truly feeling that we were spending a happy time together.
That fact will never change.
Even if her memories change, I will not forget. I cannot forget.
That memory, which I felt was the happiest in my life, is a gift that will live on in my heart, and it is eternal.
P.S.
Kotara-san, Bunseki Mama-san.
Thank you for the wonderful project.
