My Third Time in Tokyo, and the City of Jewels

I have been rejected by Tokyo twice.

The first time was in the spring when I was 18.
What arrived as the cherry blossom buds began to swell was not an acceptance letter from my first-choice university in Tokyo, but one from a university in my hometown of Kyushu.

The second time was after I graduated from college.
I moved to Tokyo to pursue a career in theater and attended a training school, but I was quickly made to realize my own limitations. Before even a year had passed, I returned to Fukuoka as if running away.

Even though I had been rejected twice, my unrequited love for Tokyo continued to smolder deep in my heart.

I somehow managed to land a job, and finally, it was my third time moving to Tokyo.
What awaited me were days of unfamiliar sales work.
On days when work didn't go well, I would blankly stare at the Shinkansen bound for "Hakata" on the station platform, sometimes thinking about just getting on it.

"Mom, I think I might not be cut out for this after all."

When I let that slip over the phone, my mother was silent for a while.
Then, she said quietly.

“Hey, do you remember? When you were little, at the Tokyo Tower observation deck at night, you kept running around saying, ‘It’s sparkling, it’s like a city of jewels’.”

—That’s right, I had forgotten.
The reason I fell in love with Tokyo.

I had wished to obtain a brilliance that could rival that dazzling city of jewels.

The next holiday, I stood beneath Tokyo Tower.
Just looking up made my neck ache.
The orange and white steel frame stretched straight toward the spring sky.

The view from the observation deck felt the same as my childhood memories, yet slightly different.
It wasn't just glamorous. It was cold and unforgiving when you got close. But it had a beauty
I couldn't look away from.

How many seasons have passed since then?
Even now, when I catch a glimpse of Tokyo Tower between work, my heart softens.

Sometimes like a strict yet kind mentor.
Sometimes like a best friend who needs no words.
It just stays there, unchanging.

…Even after trying to sound so cool, I’m still afraid of being rejected by Tokyo.
But, even if my heart breaks,
I suppose I will try to stand up again in some corner of this city of jewels.