Do people judge only by the facts they see?

Previously, I wrote an article about an unpaid invoice for a large project.

In the end, payment was made, and the incident was resolved.

However, as time passed and I looked back, something else began to bother me.

At the time, I was only looking at the other party's response, wondering, "Why would they say that?"

But as I replayed it in my mind over and over, I started to think, "Perhaps they were seeing a different landscape than I was."

This time, I would like to organize my thoughts on that.

This is how it looked to me

When I inquired about the unpaid payment, the response I received was

"We never received such a request."

That was the reply.

What I felt in that moment was not so much anger as it was bewilderment.

"Wait, I spent time, effort, and thought on this work, didn't I?"

That was the feeling.

In my mind, I had received the request, worked on it while thinking it through, wrote the article, and finished the delivery.

I felt as if all of that had been denied in a single sentence.

So, honestly, I thought, "How is their internal management handled??"

Normally, wouldn't there be some record left of who made the request?

That is what I was thinking.

Perhaps the other party was seeing a different landscape

After some time had passed, I realized that there was another way to look at it.

When using overseas services, you sometimes encounter support responses that would be surprising in Japan.

Replies are slow, or the conversation gets reset every time the representative changes.

At first, I felt it was sloppy.

However, as I gained more of those experiences, I began to think more often that it might just be a difference in culture or assumptions.

Perhaps this incident was the same.

The fact that I saw was

that I had delivered the requested work.

That was the fact.

On the other hand, what the other party saw might have been

that they had suddenly received an invoice they didn't recognize.

That is a possibility.

If they couldn't immediately verify the request history within their company, it wouldn't be unnatural for them to be cautious.

Of course, that doesn't mean it was okay.

But when I try to think from the other person's perspective, I realize there might have been a reason for that response.

I have come to be able to think that way.

Even though there is only one fact...

However, I realized something here.

I had thought that there was only one fact.

But in reality, perhaps we were both just making judgments based on the facts that we could see alone.

When you think about it that way, there are many situations where you feel 'misunderstood' not because your opinions are in conflict.

It may often be the case that you and the other person are simply seeing different information.

Through this experience, I feel I have developed a slight habit of asking myself 'what could the other person have been seeing?' before jumping to the conclusion that 'the other person is strange'.

Of course, that is not necessarily true in every situation.

Even so, the facts that seem obvious to me are not necessarily seen the same way by others.

I have realized once again something that seems obvious but is often overlooked.

So, what exactly is 'normal'?

However, as I look back on this event, there is one more thing that concerns me.

At first, I felt, 'What is going on with the internal management?'

But was it really because the management was sloppy?

Or was it just that the standards I took for granted were formed through my experiences in Japan?

I would like to observe this question a bit more as well.

Thank you for always reading.

In this note, I observe my own realizations and hypotheses triggered by daily events.

Rather than conveying the 'correct' answer, I would be happy if I could provide an opportunity for you to think, 'What would I do in this situation?'

Whether you agree or have a completely different perspective, that is fine.

I would be happy if we could think about it together in the comments.