I never imagined that would be the last bowl of ramen before it got soggy.

I never expected such a life to be waiting for me after childbirth.
At that time, none of my friends had given birth yet, so I had absolutely no image or practice for what pregnancy would be like.
When a squishy baby suddenly arrived in our home, a 24/7, 365-day battle mode began.
Even though it was over 10 years ago, it comes back to me vividly and repeatedly.

I was so anxious. Would I be able to protect this life?

My child, the cutest in the world.
However, before the cuteness, a heavy weight occupied my shoulders and my heart.
Pressure and sleep deprivation eroded me. The heavy burden that I had to protect this child was always on my back.

My eyelids are heavy.

Since I was exclusively breastfeeding, three hours was the longest I could be away.
(I had a husband at the time, but there were limits to bottle-feeding.)
Three months after giving birth, I finally managed to get some time for a hair salon and a coffee.
I had my husband practice bottle-feeding thoroughly, and it was finally achieved.

Drinking coffee slowly over time at a Kentucky Fried Chicken five minutes away.
Cutting my long hair short at the salon and getting it dyed a bright color.
Looking in the mirror, I wore a bright expression for the first time in a while.

I was a woman, too. I was a woman before I was a mom. I finally remembered.

As I slowly shifted my mood,
I headed home cautiously. My steps were light.
At home, my exhausted husband and my daughter, who had cried herself out, were waiting.

Mom is the best after all, they said, and I was able to show my composure and smile.

Before I gave birth, there was a day when I felt surprisingly good. I had gotten past the morning sickness that never seemed to end, and entered a period where everything I ate tasted delicious.

Let's eat ramen. I decided.
I stir-fried bean sprouts, cabbage, and all the vegetables I had,
seasoned them with salt and pepper, and placed them on top of instant soy sauce ramen. A luxury of a 33-yen bag of noodles.
I whispered a small 'itadakimasu',
and ate slowly, savoring the vegetables and soup, then the noodles and soup.
I fully enjoyed the happiness of eating steaming ramen while it was still warm,
before the noodles got soggy.

Yes, eating something as hot as ramen in front of a baby was no longer possible.

Time to myself was put on hold.
The steaming ramen I loved so much before birth, and watching a movie in a relaxed space at a theater while drinking cola, did not happen for a while.

Once a baby starts moving, that's it.
They are creatures that reach for everything, lick everything, roll around, and cannot be left alone for even a second.
Even cup ramen, when I went to eat it,
it had become a soggy mess.

Cute. But I want my own time, too.
That kind of life continued for over seven years.

Before you give birth to your baby, I want you to enjoy the things you can only do while pregnant.
And after that, a baby so cute they'll make you melt is waiting for you.

Yes, that was it, wasn't it? The last bowl of ramen that didn't get soggy.

I am participating in this project. Thank you, Mediterranean Climate, for such a wonderful project!
I am also reading everyone's warm posts✨

Thank you for joining me again today. It was just so real. Now, I am able to go to public baths, movies, and ramen shops quite freely. More than 10 years have passed since then.

The ramen, of course, is not soggy.