Maybe 'Trying Hard' Is Arrogance—When You Surrender Everything, Life Begins to Move Beyond 'Yourself'
"I must try harder."
"I must handle this myself."
That is how we live, constantly gripping the reins of life tightly.
However, after witnessing many turning points in life over 34 years in the courtroom, and now walking a new path as a monk, I have suddenly realized something.
It is that the effort we believe is "trying hard" may actually be nothing more than a kind of arrogance toward the "great flow of life."
Because we try to control the future with only our own small calculations and strength, anxiety never disappears, and our worries only increase.
What do you think would happen if you gently let go of those reins?
When you surrender your life to something greater than the framework of "yourself," things begin to move surprisingly smoothly and lightly.
Today, using the "teachings of salvation" that Shinran Shonin taught us as a hint, I would like to talk about the "philosophy of surrender" that allows us to easily set down the burdens of life and blossom into our true potential.
"Salvation" is not something you win, but something that reaches you
At the core of Shinran Shonin's teachings is a phrase called the "Hongan Jojumon" (The Vow Accomplished).
This is a sentence that indicates that the wish of Amida Buddha has already been fulfilled.
What is important here is the order.
We usually think like this:
"Make an effort → Get results → Be rewarded"
Those who try the hardest are the first to receive happiness. We have lived in that kind of worldview, haven't we?
But what Shinran Shonin preached was the exact opposite order.
The wish has already been delivered.
Salvation has already been offered from the other side.
It is not that we "grasp" it, but that we "simply notice what has already reached us."
This is the essential meaning that the Hongan Jojumon speaks of.
You are not saved because you worked hard to earn a qualification.
Nor is it only those who meet certain conditions who are saved.
Simply, as you are
In this very moment today,
while worrying,
while feeling lost,
just as you are.
I am already enveloped within a great wish.
When you think of it that way, don't your shoulders feel a little less tense?
We have long been convinced that 'we cannot be saved unless we become someone worthy.'
But perhaps that very belief is the 'arrogance' we have unknowingly taken upon ourselves.
'Arrogance' is not necessarily a bad thing.
Let me talk a little bit about the word 'arrogance' here.
When you hear 'arrogance,' it has a somewhat unpleasant ring to it.
People who are boastful, people who look down on others. You might have that kind of image.
But the 'arrogance' I am using here does not mean that.
It refers to the 'habit of a hard worker who tries to carry the world on their own shoulders.'
・I feel guilty if I rely on someone.
・It would be a burden if I complained.
・I must hold firm for the sake of my family.
Haven't you been convinced, without realizing it, that 'I must control everything with my own power'?
That is a habit that kind people with a strong sense of responsibility are prone to fall into.
It is by no means a bad thing.
Rather, it is the flip side of sincerity.
However, when that habit goes too far, you end up in a state where you are desperately paddling against a 'great current' all by yourself.
That is often the true nature of your exhaustion.
From my own experience
Let me share a little bit of my own story.
When I was working at the court, I was truly bound by the thought that 'I must do my best.'
I must not miss a deadline.
I must create the best possible record.
I must be useful to others.
For 34 years, I lived my life with my nerves constantly on edge like that.
Of course, that was a necessary attitude for my work.
But looking back, I realize that at some point, I had come to believe that 'if I am not trying hard, the value of my existence will diminish.'
This was truly spinning my wheels.
My shoulders were so tense that I was intentionally applying the brakes in places where I should have been able to flow more easily.
As I began to walk the path of a monk and re-engaged with the teachings of Shinran Shonin, I finally realized it.
'Even if I don't try so hard, I was already within a greater flow.'
Since that realization, the burden on my shoulders has simply lifted.
The 'inadequate self' is the starting point of salvation
Another important thing that the Vow of Fulfillment tells us is who the target is.
It is not someone who has become noble.
It is not someone who has completed their spiritual training.
It is precisely the person who is lost, troubled, burdened by worldly desires, and struggling with a self they cannot manage.
This is a truly major shift.
We try to overcome our 'inadequate selves' somehow before we move forward.
After becoming stronger.
After becoming more composed.
After becoming more confident.
In doing so, you always leave your 'current self' behind.
But Shinran Shonin says this:
Just as you are, in your flawed state, you are already wished for.
Your weaknesses,
your hesitations,
your pathetic moments,
you, carrying all of these, are already accepted as the starting point.
This is not about being defiant.
It is also not about saying 'it's fine because you're flawed'.
It simply means that there is a life that has already begun just as you are, rather than a life that only begins after you have overcome your flaws.
When we stand from that perspective, I believe we can finally be free from the tension of trying to force ourselves to change.
Practicing 'surrender' in daily life
Let's bring the discussion so far down to the daily level of 'how should I specifically live?'
When people hear 'surrender,' it is often misunderstood as doing nothing.
But that is not the case.
Surrender is a way of living where you 'do what needs to be done carefully, but do not cling to the results.'
For example, you can start with these small practices:
・Take a breath before starting your day
Take a breath before checking your schedule.
Try whispering to yourself, 'I am in the great flow today as well.'
・When you feel anxious about unseen results, put it into words
Try saying out loud, 'From here on, this is beyond my own power.' This is not giving up, but a process of taking a load off your shoulders.
・Give yourself permission to rely on others
When you feel like you are about to take everything on alone, ask yourself, 'Is this something I should be carrying by myself?'
・At the end of the day, reflect on your attitude, not the results
Instead of whether things went well or not, reflect only on whether you faced things with sincerity today.
These small, accumulated steps will gradually loosen the tension in you, the hard worker who feels like they must support the world all by themselves.
Loosen the reins you have been gripping so tightly.
Just by doing that, I believe you will feel the great flow of life begin to move naturally.
To all my readers
Life is not a spiritual discipline.
It is a series of realizations.
Even if you are lost today,
even if you are struggling,
it is okay just as you are.
Why not walk into tomorrow with a 'foundation of peace' in your heart, knowing that you are watched over by something greater?
Even without trying so hard, there are things that have already reached you.
Please, just for today, try to turn your heart toward that thought.
____________
On other social media platforms, I also share the world of Buddhism and spirituality in a relaxed way as 'Monk Yushin'.
Please feel free to come and visit if you would like.
TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@yumikono24
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/@yumikono24
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/yumikono24
threads
https://www.threads.com/@yumikono24
X (formerly Twitter)
https://twitter.com/kounodane
Moving forward,
I hope to continue sharing words that make someone's life a little lighter and brighter.
I would be very happy if you could support me by following or liking my posts.