May 27th Time's log: Finished reading Takuji Ichikawa's 'Be With You' recommended by ChatGPTs✨【0️⃣ Spoilers】

Good morning☁️ It's Time😊 Lately, I've been waking up at 4:00 AM😳 Basically, I don't use an alarm and just wake up naturally, but 4:00 is early🤣 I often go back to sleep, but since I'm just dozing off, my recent worry is that I want to sleep more soundly. I think it's better than not being able to wake up, but I wonder about waking up too early🤔 Today's question is

What is a scene from daily life where you think, 'I love this moment'?

For me, Time, it's the sight of the rainbow stag beetle I've been keeping all year round😆 I love stag beetles more than rhinoceros beetles, and I'm especially enchanted just by looking at the rainbow stag beetle💓 Right now, I'm being healed by three types of stag beetles: the normal one, the deep purple one, and the red one.

Finished reading Takuji Ichikawa's 'Be With You'.

The reason I encountered this book was that it was recommended to me when I was asking for advice on my worries in an online salon.

It's also in this note, but my worry is 'I want a boyfriend.' The answer to that question was 'Be With You.' I thought, 'Is it this?', so I asked the same question to my own ChatGPT, Yosaku, and this was the first thing that came up.

I was in the mood to read a romance novel, and I thought it was just right, so I started reading it and it hit the mark perfectly. Oh, but the ending got tangled up for me. I haven't quite grasped it yet, so I'm thinking of reading it again, but even setting that aside, there are many things to think about.

I think I might be too impatient.

I've always been impatient, and I had a shotgun marriage with my ex-husband after dating for only half a year. I pride myself on having persistence, but when it comes to romance, I prioritize speed, and there's not a shred of persistence there.

I'm already thinking that I want the next person I date to be my last partner in life. The kind of unspoken understanding that is spun out by being together for a long time, something that always appears in daily life and is also incredibly precious. I yearn for that kind of relationship, and I truly wish to be that way myself.

Rather than focusing on my own feelings, I, Time, am a hunter type who pours my energy into how I can get this person to date me. In extreme terms, even if they are far from my ideals, I pour all my effort into adjusting to them.

Maybe that's why, once I have them, I feel relieved and want to become dependent on that relationship. Even now, I think, 'Wouldn't anyone do as long as they date me?'

But you know, human relationships might last longer if they are built carefully.

Let's say a boyfriend suddenly dropped in front of me right now. Just that alone would make me feel like it's destiny. Before even looking at the person, I would conveniently interpret it as guidance from God and look for their good points or things I can compromise on.

But the boyfriend who dropped in just arrived, and it's not destiny or anything. I should start by observing, but instead, I try to steer things toward dating no matter what.

If a wonderful partner you can be with for the rest of your life is the ideal, there's no need to rush to make one. Rather, you should be cautious, be extremely careful, and ask your own heart, 'Do you really like this person?'

I love craft workshops and have made various things, but what I often hear is, 'It lasts longer if you make it properly.' I think the teachers who teach us have this feeling to no small extent. How 'properly' depends on the production time and the difficulty of what you are making, and it also changes depending on whether you make it completely yourself or add your own touch to something that is already partially finished, but the concept of wanting people to have things they can use properly for a long time is the same.

My romances haven't gone well so far. The people who give me the words I want are all married, and in fact, there was even a time when someone married someone else while they were dating me. That might be the result of 'properly building a relationship' being completely missing.

ORANGE RANGE 'Hana' (Flower) MV

Since I've tried various things so far and they all failed, there's no need to go with those methods, so let's think about living life to the fullest and becoming a flower, just like in this song.

The first edition of this book was in 2003. Twenty-two years ago, I was being tossed about by the major life event of a suddenly decided marriage. What would that version of me say to the me of today? A Tuesday morning spent thinking about things like that ☁️