From 'Sweat as an Enemy' to 'The Body's Voice': What I've Learned After 7 Years

Seven years since I started living with compensatory sweating

It was seven years ago that I first began to face compensatory sweating.

It started with a sudden realization. Before I knew it, the sweat on my back had increased. Every time I looked in the mirror, I would check for sweat marks. 'It happened again.' That kind of surveillance was a daily occurrence.

Before long, sweat stopped being a 'bodily reaction' and became a 'symptom.' It became an enemy.

The sweat running down my back felt like proof of my own weakness. I could never wear sleeveless tops. Even in front of others or while at work, I was always monitoring myself to see if I was sweating.

That watchful eye gradually encroached on my sleep, my meals, and even my relationships.

Until 'sweat as a symptom' changed to 'a bodily reaction'

How did that change happen? I don't remember a clear 'turning point' moment.

But I think it changed little by little before I even realized it.

I read many books by Dr. Hiroko Mizushima and studied psychology. Perhaps I stopped blaming myself for 'sweating' and shifted to the idea that 'maybe the sweat is my body trying to tell me something.'

Once I was able to think of sweat not as an enemy, but as a message telling me 'this is important,' the watchful eye loosened just a little bit.

The feeling of 'having forgotten'

A Wednesday afternoon.

It wasn't that I was absorbed in my work. It wasn't that someone had praised me. It was just that, suddenly, I realized I hadn't been thinking about sweat.

My back and underarms were dry, and I was able to accept that as just a normal 'state of the body.'

'Oh, I'm not sweating today.'

If it were the old me, I would have been happy about that result, thinking 'lucky' or 'I'm okay today.' But now, I just processed it with the feeling that 'sometimes that happens.'

I no longer remember things from the long holidays. The pain of those days. The way I used to blame myself back then.

I think it means that while those things are important information, they are no longer constantly on my mind.

The difference between 'sweat as a symptom' and 'a bodily reaction'

To be honest, the sweating hasn't disappeared completely. Sometimes, it still happens suddenly.

But when it does, I no longer blame myself like I used to, thinking, 'Oh, the symptoms are back.'

Instead, I think, 'Oh, I see. Is there something bothering me?' or 'Maybe I'm just tired today.' I've started to hear the sweat as a kind of 'signal'.

That difference may seem small, but it's actually quite significant.

The sweat is the same. The drop running down my back is the same.

Whether I call it a 'symptom' or a 'bodily reaction.' I realized that just by changing that name, the rest of my day changes.

Recommended for people like this

Those struggling with compensatory sweating. Those who see sweat as an 'enemy.' Those who blame themselves every time they see sweat marks on their back.

Those who think their worth is determined by not sweating. Those who are constantly under the pressure of 'I have to control my sweat.'

And also for those who are reminded of their former selves, who tried too hard to aim for a 'perfect body'.

Not recommended for people like this

This article is not medical advice. If you continue to experience physical or mental distress, please consult a doctor or specialist.

Those who want to know medical treatments for compensatory sweating. Those who want to eliminate symptoms completely. This is not for those looking for an immediate cure.

⚠️ This article is not medical advice. If you feel physical or mental distress, please consult a doctor or specialist. This is a personal record based on the author's experience.