The 28-year-old who thought she could 'get married anytime,' wavering between 'it's still okay' and 'it's too late,' but it's going to be okay!

Life Design Note #018
The 28-year-old who thought she could 'get married anytime'

I once received a consultation from a 28-year-old woman.

She had a boyfriend four years her senior whom she had been dating for five years.

He had apparently told her, 'I want to get married by the time you turn 30.'

But she,

'I still want to enjoy being single'
'I think marriage can wait a little longer'

was putting off marriage.

It wasn't that she disliked him.

Rather,

She says she had a sense of security that she could marry him anytime.
That was the kind of peace of mind she had.

However, one day, he told her,

'I can't wait anymore'

and broke up with her.

Only after they had broken up,

'If only I had listened to him properly and thought about it more seriously...'

she said she regretted it.

One month later.

When she reached out, hoping to get back together with him, he already had a new woman.

She was apparently in deep shock.

And then, after a while, a different kind of anxiety began to emerge.

I only have two years left until I'm 30. And I don't even have a boyfriend right now...

Asking friends for introductions or attending matchmaking parties.

That was the start of her journey to find a marriage partner.

Between 'I'm still fine' and 'it's too late'

At 28, there is no need to rush into marriage.

But,

it doesn't mean you can just do nothing,

thinking, 'I'm still young, it'll happen eventually.'

When I provide marriage counseling,

I often hear people say that what they thought they could 'do anytime' was actually 'not something they could do anytime.'

I hear stories like that often.

Having a partner.
Being proposed to.
Meeting a good person.
Having that person like you back.
And, both of you wanting to get married at the same time.

None of these things are guaranteed.

That said,

there is no need to panic and think, 'I have to get married right now!'

What is important is to

think carefully about when you want to get married and what kind of life you want to lead.

Take the time to think about it once.

It's not 'I'm still fine,' and it's not 'it's too late,' either.

Take control of your own life's timeline.

Before starting your marriage hunt, I believe this point is very important.

For those of you who are university students or in your 20s,
try imagining 'a week in your life 10 years from now' on a relaxed day.
What kind of life do you want for yourself?
Let's recognize that right now, first of all.

While hopes and circumstances change as society evolves,
starting to plan your life is the first step to not getting lost.

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