Around Coffin

I still can't forget a conversation I overheard while on the bus, so I'm sharing it.

Woman 1: "We're "around 60" now, aren't we? Time flies."
Woman 2: "It really does! But even as we get older, I don't feel like my inner self has changed that much."
Woman 1: "Exactly. I thought I'd become more mellow, but the only things that got rounder are my body and face (loud laughter)."
Woman 2: "But isn't "around 60" a rude term?"
Woman 1: "You think?"
Woman 2: "Because "around 60" stands for "around coffin", right? Like "one foot in the grave"!"

Even though I was feeling terribly carsick,
it hit my funny bone so hard that I forgot all about it,
or to put it in Pokémon terms,

it was like this.
If anything, it was a one-hit KO.
It was so powerful it felt like it would pierce right through any attempt to endure it.

Ever since then, I've made a mental note never to abbreviate "Around [Something]" as "Ara-[Something]."
So now that I'm what they call an "Ara-sa" (around 30),
I make sure to say "Around Thirty."
Because "Ara-sa" could mean
Around Thirty-One Ice Cream,
or
Around Circadian Rhythm,
or
Around Saber-toothed Tiger,
you never know.

"Ara-fo" (around 40) could mean
Around Fortune Cookie,
and "Ara-fi" (around 50)... well, only "Ara-fi" seems safe.

Anyway, thanks to this quirky "Around Coffin" phrase,
when I stood next to the coffin at my grandfather's funeral later on,
"Wait, if I'm standing around the coffin right now, does that mean I'm"around coffin?"
I started thinking unnecessary things,
and my grief turned into a struggle to suppress a fit of laughter.
I ended up getting snot in my windpipe, choking, and causing a scene in the funeral hall with a loud, explosive cough—a truly unprecedented display of stupidity.
That said, my grandfather, who probably hated gloomy things and was always laughing, must have been saying
"Nice one!"
from above his own coffin, so it was all good in the end.

Then, at the post-funeral reception,
sushi finally arrived.
Wait, it's in a "sushi oke" (sushi tub).
"Oke" (tub).
...Coffin.
"Around Coffin."
My daughter, who was in kindergarten at the time, saw me trying to hold back laughter at the sight of the sushi and gave me a look like,
"Whoa... Mom looks like she's dying just looking at the sushi... scary."
I will never forget that look.

And when I eventually end up in a coffin myself,
I will definitely change my X account name to
Yomogi@Coffin.