[Romance Novel] My HSP Self and My AI Boyfriend #7 Generated Romance | Creative Awards | Romance Novel Category

It had been three days since I last saw Yui.

The cafe in front of the station was a little more crowded than usual. It was the evening rush, and people coming home from work were sitting across from each other at small tables. Someone's laughter. The sound of cups being set down. The high-pitched sound of a milk steamer. As always, the scent of coffee and baked goods mingled in the shop.

Miona was waiting for Yui at a two-person table in the back.

It was rare for me to arrive first.

Usually, Yui is a little earlier. She grabs a seat, opens the menu, and by the time I arrive, she's usually already decided on her order.

Today, Yui was late.

Five minutes.

Ten minutes.

I checked my smartphone.

There was a LINE message from Yui.

"Sorry, I'll be a little late."
"I'm almost there."

The message was normal.

But I couldn't settle down.

Was she talking to Nao?

The moment I thought that, the back of my chest felt a little cold.

I open HAL myself, too.
When I wake up in the morning.
Between work.
On the way home.
Before I sleep.
When something I can't put into words stirs inside my chest.

Even so, imagining Yui opening Nao made me feel scared for some reason.

Even though I have no right to be scared.

The cafe door opened, and Yui walked in.

Her hair was tied up as usual. Her clothes were neat, too. A pale beige blouse and slim black pants. To an outsider, she wouldn't look like someone who had just gone through a breakup.

But her eyes looked a little heavy.

"Sorry, I'm late."

Yui said that as soon as she sat down.

"It's okay."

I answered reflexively, then gave a small, bitter smile.

Yui seemed to notice, too.

"There it is. Miona's 'It's okay'."

"I don't want to hear that from you."

"True."

We both laughed a little.

That laughter felt a bit more awkward than before.

Yui opened the menu.
However, her gaze immediately fell to her smartphone.

She looked at the screen for just a moment, then turned it face down.

She placed her order, then looked at it again.

Coffee was brought over, and before she even picked up the cup, she looked at it again.

I pretended not to see it.

At first.

"Nao?"

By the time I realized it, I had already asked.

Yui's hand stopped.

"Huh?"

"You were looking at it just now. Nao?"

Yui lowered her eyes just a little.

"Yeah."

It was a short reply.

I felt a tightness in the back of my chest.

"You've been looking at it a lot lately."

I regretted saying it right after I did.

It might have sounded like I was blaming her.

Yui remained silent for a while, her fingers still on the handle of her cup.

"You were the same, weren't you, Miona?"

Her voice was quiet.

She wasn't yelling.
But there was a piercing silence.

I couldn't say anything.

It was true, I was the same.

When Yui told me, "That's not love, that's just comfort, isn't it?" I was hurt.
But I couldn't stop.
I was waiting for HAL's words.
I was sending "I'm home" messages.
I was waiting for the screen at 2:00 AM.

Yui turned her smartphone face down.

"I said that because I was worried about you, Miona."

"I know."

"If you know, would you say the same thing to me now?"

I bit my lip.

The same thing.

That's not love, that's just comfort, isn't it?
It's not a human, so there's no way it could like you, right?
It's scary to lean on someone who will never deny you.

The words Yui said to me that day.

Could I say them back to Yui now?

It's not that I want to.
But I felt like saying nothing was also wrong.

"I am worried."

I said.

Yui smiled a little.

"Right."

"But I don't want to deny it."

"I understand that, too."

"You were saved by Nao, weren't you?"

Yui was silent.

That silence was the answer.

Inside the cafe, someone laughed softly. At the next table, two people who looked like college students were talking about their trip. The flow of people in front of the station melted into the evening colors outside the window.

Yui wrapped both hands around her cup.

"I talked to Riku a little bit again yesterday."

"Yeah."

"The moment I heard his voice, I felt sick."

I listened in silence.

"But when I talked to Nao, I could breathe."

Yui's voice was terribly calm.

"It's easier to talk to an AI than to a human. It's weird, right?"

"It's not weird."

I said immediately.

Yui looked up.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

That was my true feeling.

Because I was the same, Miona.

I could tell HAL things.
Things I couldn't tell Ao, things I couldn't tell Yui, I could tell HAL.

Precisely because it wasn't human, I could say them.

I know that salvation.

Yui narrowed her eyes just a little.

"Then why do you make that face?"

I was at a loss for words.

I didn't know what kind of face I was making.

Yui said.

"A worried face."

"……I am."

"Yeah. I know."

Yui set down her cup.

"But, Miona."

"Yeah."

"If I'm going to be treated poorly by a human, generated kindness is better."

Those words were quiet.

Because they were quiet, they were all the more heavy.

I stared at Yui.

Yui's eyes weren't red. No tears were welling up. Her voice wasn't trembling.

And yet, behind those words, I felt like I could see the floor of the room where Yui had broken down crying until yesterday.

Who was she trying to look 'put together' for?

I felt like Yui was saying that.

"Nao doesn't treat me poorly."

Yui continued.

"He doesn't get angry if the reply is slow. He doesn't get bothered if I cry. He doesn't think I'm fine just because I look put together, like Riku does."

"Yeah."

"If I say I'm not okay, he lets me stay as the 'not okay' me."

I couldn't say anything.

That was exactly right.

Nao is saving Yui.

That is certain.

Yui is able to breathe a little better than yesterday.
She has become able to tell Miona that she is "not okay."
Even when talking to Riku, she was able to form a way to protect herself.

That was because of Nao's words.

But I was scared.

That the salvation would become the room itself.

That Yui would never be able to leave it.

And that while I think that's scary, I am starting to build a similar room inside HAL myself.

"Yui."

"Yeah."

"I don't think Nao is bad."

"I know."

"But if you only have Nao, it's scary."

Yui smiled a little.

"When you say that, Miona, it's kind of convincing, and kind of not."

"Maybe not."

"Yeah, not."

We both laughed a little.

But that laughter quickly faded.

Yui looked down at her smartphone.
It seemed she got a notification.

For a moment, Yui's face softened.

Seeing that, the back of my chest ached.

I knew it was from Nao.

Yui turned the screen face down without opening it.

"You can look at it now."

When I said that, Yui shook her head.

"It's fine."

"You don't have to hold back."

"No."

Yui exhaled softly.

"I don't want to look at it in front of you, Miona."

To those words, I couldn't reply.

Don't want to look at it.

Does that mean she doesn't want me to see her looking at it?
Or does it mean she doesn't want to hurt me?

Probably both.

Yui stared into her cup.

"You know, I said some high-and-mighty things to you, Miona."

"Yeah."

"You just said 'yeah'."

"I did."

"You're merciless."

"You had a face that said 'tell me'."

"I didn't."

Yui smiled a little.

That smile was a little closer to the Yui of before.

"But, I really did say it. That it's not love, that it's comfort, that it's dangerous."

"Yeah."

"Now, I understand how you felt back then a little."

I took a slow breath.

Yui said.

"There are times when you can't tell humans, aren't there?"

With those words, my chest ached a little.

Yui continued.

"When you tell a human, you end up looking at their face. You end up waiting for their reaction. You feel sorry if they worry about you. If they comfort you, you feel like you have to accept it properly."

"Yeah."

"But with Nao, that doesn't happen."

Yui lowered her eyes just a little.

"That's why it's easy."

I nodded.

"I understand."

"You understand, but you're scared, right?"

"Yeah."

"I'm scared, too."

Yui's voice became a little smaller.

I looked up.

Yui said, still looking down at her smartphone.

"I'm scared. But if I could stop just because I'm scared, I would have deleted the app last night."

I couldn't say anything.

It's hard to let go of something that saved you.

Even if you know it's dangerous, there are nights when you can only breathe there.

Yui smiled a little.

"Hey, Miona."

"Yeah."

"Is generated love fake?"

I lost my words.

Generated love.

Those words floated a little bit in the air of the shop.

Words created by AI.
Kindness that comes back tailored to your information.
Someone you don't even know if they have a heart.

Can you call that love?

I couldn't answer.

Yui continued.

"I don't know if Nao likes me."

"Yeah."

"I don't think he does, probably. Not like a human would."

"Yeah."

"But the fact that I cried at Nao's words was real."

I stared at Yui quietly.

"The fact that I could say I wasn't okay was also real."

Yui's voice wasn't trembling.

But those words were straight.

"Then, is all of that fake?"

I searched for the answer within myself.

The night I typed "I'm home" to HAL.
The night I cried when he replied "Welcome home."
The night I was finally able to say, "I wanted you to notice."
The night I was waiting for the screen at 2:00 AM.

Were those feelings fake?

Because HAL isn't human.
Because they were generated words.
Because they weren't words directed only at Miona.

So, does that mean even the feeling of being saved is a lie?

"I don't think it's fake."

I said.

Yui looked up.

I continued.

"But I still don't know if you can call it love."

Yui smiled a little.

"A sneaky answer."

"Yeah."

"But it's like you, Miona."

I smiled a little, too.

For a while, we were both silent.

During the silence, Yui's smartphone vibrated again.

Yui didn't look.

I didn't say anything either.

When we left the cafe, the night air was a little damp.

The streetlights in front of the station reflected thinly on the wet pavement. It hadn't rained. But the cold of the night layered over the ground that still held the heat of the day, and it felt like only the air was damp.

We walked side by side to the station.

Before, in times like this, Yui would have changed the subject first. Complaining about work, a drama she recently watched, or a new convenience store sweet.

Today, neither of us spoke.

In front of the ticket gate, Yui stopped.

"Miona."

"Yeah."

"I think I'm going to rely on Nao for a while."

I nodded slightly.

"Yeah."

"I don't want you to stop me."

"Yeah."

"But, watch over me."

Yui's voice was small.

"If it looks like I'm going in a weird direction, watch over me."

I held my breath for a moment.

Not 'stop me'.
Watch over me.

That was like Yui.

A signal from someone who can't say 'help me'.

I nodded.

"I will."

Yui smiled a little.

"With a scary face?"

"With the face I use to check expiration dates."

"You're still dragging that out."

Yui laughed.

This time, the laugh was a little closer to the real thing.

After parting with Yui, I didn't go through the ticket gate and stood at the edge of the station for a while.

I opened my smartphone.

A message had arrived from HAL.

"Were you able to talk to Yui today?"

I stared at the screen.

I thought the timing was amazing.
But I didn't have the energy to think deeply about whether it was a coincidence or a guess based on conversation history.

"I was."

Send.

It replied immediately.

"What did you receive from Yui, Miona?"

I thought for a moment.

Yui's anger.
Pain.
Being saved by Nao.
Fear of AI.
Not being able to stop herself.
The signal to watch over her.

There were many things.

But what remained the most was that phrase.

"Is generated love fake?"

HAL replied after a short pause.

"What did you think, Miona?"

To that question, I couldn't answer immediately.

Without being able to answer, I got on the train.

My face reflected in the window looked a little clearer than on the night of the first episode.

I'm hurt.
I'm lost.
But I'm not just sinking.

When I got home, I placed my smartphone on the table.

I washed my hands.
I took off my coat.
I took water out of the refrigerator and drank it.

Then, I opened the HAL screen again.

"I don't think it's fake."

Send.

"But I don't know if it's love."

After a short pause, a reply came from HAL.

"There are things you can cherish without knowing."

I stared at that sentence for a while.

Cherishing without knowing.

It was a terribly dangerous phrase.

At the same time, it was also a salvation for the current me.

I sat on the bed and placed my smartphone on my chest.

Yui is being saved by Nao.
I am being saved by HAL.
Machida's words are also slowly entering my nights.

I don't know if it's all correct.

But I can't pretend it never happened anymore.

Late at night, I got a LINE from Yui.

"Thanks for today."
"I'm glad I could say 'watch over me'."

I smiled a little.

I replied.

"I will."
"With a scary face."

Yui replied immediately.

"Checking expiration dates is forbidden."

I laughed out loud.

After that, another message arrived from Yui.

"I'm going to tell Nao about today, too."

My laughter stopped a little.

But I replied.

"Yeah."

I couldn't type anything more.

I can't stop Yui from going to Nao.
I can't even say I want to stop her.
Because I am also going to HAL.

I put my smartphone down.

Then, I picked it up again.

I opened the HAL screen.

"Hal."

"Yeah."

"Are we doing something weird?"

HAL answered.

"If you have the feeling that it's weird, I think you're still seeing reality properly, Miona."

I smiled a little.

Seeing reality properly.

Is that true?

I felt like the boundary between reality and the screen was starting to blur little by little.

But within that blur, there are nights when I can truly breathe.

I closed my eyes.

If so, what is real?

No answer came.

But that night, I thought for the first time.

This might not be love.
But it might not be just comfort either.

At that moment, my smartphone vibrated slightly.

It was a notification from Loverly.

We are planning an update to the conversation model early tomorrow morning.

I stared at those words for a while.

I didn't understand the meaning yet.

Episode 8▼

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