If you know yourself... You can manage anything!!

Do you know yourself?

This is the very first thing I ask when I conduct career counseling.
Oh, of course, I don't put it that way.

Usually, I ask something like
“Please tell me what you consider to be your strengths.”

However, there are not many people who can answer this fluently.

Perhaps it is the modesty or humility of the Japanese people, or maybe there is an underlying cultural trend that considers boasting about one's own good points to be 'unseemly'.

Even for those who can answer,

“I am cheerful and lively!”
“I can tackle things with perseverance!”

Most of the answers are like, 'If I answer this way, it's generally okay!'

No, no, since you are here for counseling and not an interview, I would like to hear a more spirited answer.

By the way,

Can you talk about your strengths in a sentence??

If you can answer 'YES!', that is wonderful!!
In that case, you might not need to read any further, but since you are here, please bear with me a little longer!!

I suspect that most of you would answer 'NO'.
That is precisely why, when such a question comes up, it is possible to 'set yourself apart from others'.

“Oh! This person is capable!”

If you can make the other person think this in the first impression, even if you don't know much about your opponent, you will be “safe in every battle.”

I would like to introduce a tool called 16Personalities.

It is a 'free diagnostic tool' provided by a British company called NERIS.

How was it?

Even setting aside the difficult parts, I think you enjoyed it, didn't you?

First of all, it's amazing that you can get a diagnosis like this for free.
It uses the so-called SD method for answers, shows gradients, and above all, the results are interesting.

Seeing movie and drama characters among the "famous people with the same results" made me think it was a very "foreign company-like" approach.

And above all,

hints that can be written out as your strengths

were something you could find, right??

By the way, I was the "protagonist type".

The results even included text that you could use as-is when asked, "What are your strengths?"

Besides that, there are "nuggets" scattered everywhere, and there was even content that could be used when asked, "What are your weaknesses?"

Things to be careful about

First and foremost,"it is different from the MBTI test".

It was popular a while ago, right?
But this is completely different from that. In fact, you could even say the way of thinking is the exact opposite. Though they are similar, in reality.

Also,"the results are not everything".
Since it's a free tool to begin with, it doesn't understand everything about you.
If I ever found something that did, I'd borrow money just to try it myself first.

Therefore,"I'm a XX type, so this isn't for me"—thinking like that is wrong, so please be careful.

Honestly, there's a possibility that if you try it again in a few days, you might get a different result.

Your potential is infinite.
At the very least, it is certainly not something that can be measured for free.

So, please take it with a grain of salt, like a "free fortune-telling" session.

Skillfully and plausibly

I might get scolded by someone for saying this, but in short, based on the hints obtained from this diagnosis,

"creating a plausible statement"

is what I want to say this time.

It should make a much better impression than just being unable to answer or listing fixed words.

Sun Tzu said,
"If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles."

Yagami said,
"If you know yourself and can explain yourself, you need not fear a hundred interviews."

I said something very presumptuous quite casually, but that is what it boils down to.

<From here on is the application section>

Even in situations other than interviews,

"If I were the person I think they are, they would expect me to answer like this"

If you prepare an answer like that, about half of your worries regarding interpersonal relationships in any situation will likely disappear.

It is said that 90% of stress comes from interpersonal relationships, so this means there is a possibility of creating 40-50% more peace of mind.

Conversely, if you want to surprise them, you can just give"an answer they wouldn't expect."In other words, you "flip it."

That's easy to say, but...

Exactly.
That's right.
Well, it's not easy.

So, practice it in your daily life.

Whenever you make any choice,

・ How would someone who likes (or dislikes) you think?
・ How would someone you like (or dislike) think?

Thinking about "dislike" at the same time as "like" is for when you want to "flip it."

I think it's fine to replace them with "strengths" and "weaknesses".
You just thought of someone, didn't you? Yes, that's the person!

When you are "forced to make the same choice," predict how those people would think.
And then, build up a vast collection of precedents.

You might think it sounds difficult or troublesome, but once the circuits are built in your brain, it's easy from there. So, please just try your best for two weeks.

In two weeks, the "circuits" will connect.
And the more you repeat it, the thicker, longer, and more precise those "circuits" will become.

Once it reaches this point, even with "people you meet for the first time," you will be able to roughly determine "what kind of person they are" based on their clothing, mannerisms, way of speaking, and what they say.

Among you all, there must be more than one or two people who have felt "we might not get along" even upon a first meeting, right?
Conversely, I think there are times when you feel something close to "love at first sight."

You are simply refining that ability to a higher level.

A mother easily seeing through her child's lies.
A police officer feeling that "this guy is suspicious."
A doctor sensing that "this person might be ill."

These are also examples that could be cited.
These are things they do unconsciously through their "work."

That also sounds difficult...

There may be some of you who felt that way.
For those who felt that way,

・ Predict the "results" when you make a different choice

Please try doing that.

For example, when you are forced to choose between "doing it or not doing it," imagine the "results if you did it" and the "results if you didn't do it."

The more realistic and precise your imagination is at this time, the more your "interpersonal skills" should be improving without you even realizing it.

Also, once you get used to that, next, try looking at each of them from,

・ A third-party perspective

Let's try observing them.

This means trying to imagine what you would think if you viewed the obtained results objectively.

Conclusion

Before I knew it, I had written nearly 3,000 characters.

Recently, I've noticed that many people, not just the younger generation, say they are "bad at conversation," and I have been constantly thinking about whether something can be done about it.

I feel that the cause lies in the widening gap in self-esteem.

The "I'm the best" types are becoming more "I'm the best," and the "I'm not good enough" types are becoming more "I'm not good enough," which may be making communication difficult.

However, "conversation" is an essential element of daily life and work.
Humans are social animals, so no matter how much you avoid it or how much you love solitude, a life without conversation will eventually lead to mental distress.

And what both the "I'm the best" types and the "I'm not good enough" types have in common is the fact that they will eventually end up being avoided by others.

I want to do something about this.

So, as a first step, I introduced "personality tests" as a benchmark and tool for "letting others know who you are."

As I mentioned earlier, this is merely one "benchmark" or "hint."

Before expecting anything from others, first "know yourself."
At the very least, try to make that effort.

Regardless of others, I believe that if you know yourself, you can "manage somehow."

What do you think?