What is dialogue?

I arrived at a place completely different from the answer I had prepared in advance.
That was my meeting with a client just the other day.

It wasn't that there was a conclusion decided from the start.

It wasn't that I used any special techniques either.
We were just aiming in the same direction together,

exchanging words little by little.
When it was over,

there were certainly "things decided."
But what remained more than that
was the feeling that "that time was good."
I started thinking about the reason for that afterward.

⸻

The act of people exchanging words

There are several ways to refer to words exchanged between people.
For example,

conversation, dialogue, and discussion.
I'll try looking them up in a Japanese dictionary.

• Conversation: Two or more people exchanging words

• Dialogue: Speaking while facing each other
• Discussion: Exchanging opinions and debating right from wrong
For the time being, I thought, I see.

However, to be honest,
even reading just the dictionary definitions,
it doesn't look like there is a definitive difference.


They are all the same in that they involve "exchanging words."But which one of these was what I felt during that meeting time?

Only that question remained.
⸻

The phrase "facing each other" caught my attention

When I looked back at the dictionary again,
there was a phrase that suddenly caught my eye.

Facing each other.

This one sentence written in the explanation of "dialogue."
Does this simply mean "to meet face-to-face"?

Certainly, at that time,
my client and I were indeed facing each other across a desk.

However, what left a stronger impression than that
was the moment my own thinking wavered slightly due to the other person's words.
The other person's expression and gestures
when I replied, "That may indeed be true."

In response to my words,
the other person would suddenly brighten up,
or make a face that looked a little surprised.

During that time, my client and I,
rather than just talking,
felt like we were facing the same question together.

⸻

What dictionary definitions alone lack

Dictionaries are (presumably) correct.
But you cannot understand the depth of the meaning a word indicates with a dictionary alone.

When I think about what "dialogue" means in my own way,
rather than "speaking" itself,
"what attitude you have when you are there while speaking"is what I interpreted as being important.
I think it's abstract, so I will show the process a little more.

My thinking is slightly rewritten by the other person's words.
The other person's perspective changes slightly with my words.
Enjoying that change through the exchange of words.
Not summarizing early, and not forcing it.
Taking on that time together.
That is the image.

Here, the word "dialogue" finally
began to take shape vaguely within me.

⸻

Dialogue cannot be called efficient

In the business world, it is often said, "Start with the conclusion."

Summarize the main points.
Share the optimal solution.
Don't waste time.

I myself
am often helped by the power of summarizing and organizing,
and I also use AI for summaries and work efficiency on a daily basis.

Being optimized quickly within a limited time,
and having answers derived, certainly has considerable value.

However, even knowing that value, I still think.

The power of dialogue
sometimes suddenly arises between people in a place and at a timing
that is not on the extension of efficiency.

Ideas that were not anticipated.
Perspectives that could not have been reached alone.
And the feeling of "having thought together."

⸻

My own definition of dialogue

Having thought this far,
if I were to put dialogue into words in my own way, it would be this.

Dialogue is,
a process of mutually allowing
the meaning to be rewritten along the way.

It is okay if the idea you held at the beginning
changes along the way.
Rather,
you exchange words on the premise that it will change.

Therefore, in dialogue,
there is no prior sense of security based on a conclusion.

Instead, there is the margin of "it's okay to change."

⸻

The fact that there is someone you can have a dialogue with

Defined that way, "dialogue" is not something that can be established with just anyone.

It requires time to exchange words, and it also requires patience.
That is precisely why,
whether it is family, a lover, a friend,
a boss, a subordinate, or a business partner, it doesn't matter.

The fact that there is someone who will stop with you without rushing for an answer
is something I think is very fortunate, and not to exaggerate, miraculous.

In this day and age, the emphasis on time performance is accelerating.
Precisely because only main points and conclusions are sought,
this kind of time, which looks unproductive from the outside, is often left behind in many cases.

But, at least for me,
through "facing" the client that day, I was able to feel the "value of dialogue" once again.

Well, that's all for today.

If there is someone around you
with whom you can have a "dialogue",
please cherish that person and that time.

A human life has a lifespan, and the number of people you can be involved with is limited.
Because I think that meeting such a person itself
is a very miraculous probability.

Well, Sunday is coming to an end, isn't it.

If there is anything in this note that resonates with you even a little, I would be happy if you could support it with a "Like."

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