Why can't I make up my mind? I just don't want to make a mistake.

It wasn't the path I was lost on. When the 'standard' takes precedence, people stop moving.

I keep thinking, 'I should be able to do this much on my own...' but for some reason, I just can't seem to make a decision.

I don't want to make a mistake. I want to do things properly. That's why I'm cautious. Yet, the thing I fear most is getting tired and seeing my accuracy drop.

Thank you for always reading my posts.
I am truly happy for your likes, comments, and follows.
I read each and every one of them with care.

In truth, I would like to take each of you by the hand, look you in the eye, and say 'thank you.'
That is how happy I am that my words are reaching you.

'I didn’t know I was lost'—I saw these lyrics and thought the opposite.

If there is no destination, the state of being 'lost' does not exist.
You are simply walking.

When you feel like you are 'lost,' you probably have a destination.
Because there is a place you are going, you feel like your current self is off-course, which creates the feeling of being lost.

However, when being lost drags on, the center of your consciousness shifts.
Instead of 'where I want to go,' 'not making a mistake' comes to the forefront.

The deeper the confusion, the less you can see your 'true destination,' and instead, only the 'standard' comes to the front.

Separating 'Destination' and 'Standard'

Once you separate these, the true nature of your confusion becomes easier to see.

Destination (where you are going): Where you truly want to go / What you want to protect
e.g., build trust, protect family, keep things running smoothly, see it through to the end

Standard (conditions): The rules / criteria for judgment to get there
e.g., don't make mistakes, don't inconvenience others, don't get flustered, don't show too much emotion

The destination is the 'direction.'
The standard is the 'way of walking.'

This is usually where the pain comes from.

The destination disappears. Only the standard remains.

When standards take center stage, people stop moving.

For example, "don't make a mistake."
This is more likely to become a "condition" than a destination.

Conditions tend to be all or nothing.
But in reality, choices often lack 100% guarantees.

Since there is no guarantee, risk is born the moment you decide.
That is why you become unable to decide.

It may seem like you are hesitating, but what is actually happening is,

"stopping in order to uphold a standard"
is the phenomenon, I believe.

And when that standard is tied to "the version of myself that wants to be proper," the tendency to stop becomes even stronger.

You aren't just hesitating.
You are trying to remain "the version of yourself that doesn't make mistakes," and as a result, you've become unable to move.

The more you carry it alone, the deeper the hesitation becomes.

There is a habit that tends to occur in tandem with this.
You cannot rely on others. You try to handle everything by yourself.

You can't rely on others because you feel like you are burdening them.
And for another reason, you feel that the moment you rely on someone, "the version of yourself that is proper" will crumble.
That is why you lean toward carrying it all alone.

But the more you carry it alone, the worse the conditions gradually become.

• Your perspective doesn't expand

• Your options don't increase

• You get tired and your accuracy drops

Even though you took it on "to avoid making a mistake,"
the more you carry, the fewer decision-making materials you have, and the more you hesitate.
You get tired, your accuracy drops, and you move closer to the very mistake you wanted to avoid most.

Don't discard your standards; make them realistic.

What's important here isn't to discard the idea of "not making mistakes."
For people with a strong sense of responsibility, that is also a strength.

So, if you're going to change something, don't change the "rigidity" of your standards, but the "way you phrase" them.

• "Don't make mistakes" → "Don't cause a fatal injury"

• "Don't cause trouble" → "Minimize it and be able to recover"

• "Don't get flustered" → "I may waver, but I can recover"

By doing this, your standards change from something to "protect" into something you can "use."
They become tools for judgment rather than all-or-nothing conditions.

Your hesitation turns back into "judgment" instead of a "dead end."

Hesitation is not a sign of your weakness.

You feel hesitant because you have a destination.
Your standards are strict because there is something you want to protect.

However, the moment your standards take center stage, your destination disappears, and you come to a halt.

Before blaming yourself for being stuck, I want you to check something first.

"Where is it that I actually want to go?"
"To get there, what is it that I want to protect right now?"

Sometimes, just by bringing your destination back into focus, your hesitation will fade.

If you recognize the feeling of "standards taking center stage and losing sight of your destination," please take a look at this as well.

The mechanism where "misplacing your purpose" causes your methods to run wild
"Wait, why am I so busy again?"—The answer might lie in "misplacing your purpose."