Awkward Moments with the Maasai

I'm married to a Maasai man, but


actually, there are moments when things get a bit awkward with them.

1 Please, I beg you, wear a name tag

I first went to the Maasai village in 2022.

Since then, I've stayed in Japan for long periods about twice,

so even though I built a house in the Maasai village, I haven't lived there for even half the year.


Maybe that's why the family (especially the kids) welcomes me so happily every time I return to the village ☺️



The settlement we are in mainly consists of James's mother, his older brother's family, and his older sister,



but after all, James is one of 11 siblings, so there are just so many relatives!

And perhaps because they live in a community called a village,


unlike in Japan, it's not like we only meet a few times a year,


but we see each other's faces all the time (because there is a lot of movement between settlements).



However, no one introduces themselves, haha.


Unless I ask James myself,

he won't tell me the details of who the person in front of me is,

what their name is, or which side of the family they are from,


so I'm always guessing based on the vibe or how much they look like someone else.

I just stare at everyone talking and try to figure out the family relationships 😂


It's especially tricky because Maasai people generally don't hang out together if they are of different genders,


so even if they are in the same settlement, I have no idea who is married to whom.


Even when I went to visit James's older sister's village, I didn't know who her husband was,


and since he was often away, I rarely had the chance to greet him.


And in my memory, I've probably only seen his face once.


But around the village, as the wife of the Mzungu (foreigner) who married James—who didn't understand English at all—


countless people know of my existence.

And when I'm in the village, they often come to visit the house.


It's not rare for me to recognize a face but not know the name.


Everyone always calls me by my Maasai name.


I want to call them by their names and greet them too,


but no one tells me their names, and even if I ask, the Maasai names are so difficult that they don't stick in my head,

so I only remember the ones with simple names like Sarah or Anna, haha.



And then one day, I made a huge blunder.



It was one day when I was working in Dar es Salaam as usual,


and a Maasai man on a motorcycle was looking at me in a friendly way.

Then, James's expression changed from playful to serious,


and even though we were in the middle of talking about something,


he immediately went over to that person and greeted him.


Usually, in the Maasai village, I follow Maasai culture

and perform the Maasai greeting (for elders, I bow my head and they place their hand on it).

Since that person was looking at me happily,

I thought, (Is he an acquaintance of James from TikTok?)

and since he kept looking at me after that,

I greeted him normally in Swahili,

but he had a puzzled look on his face, and the atmosphere became strange.

Then, after he left, I asked James who that person was,


and he said, "That's Ana's (James's older sister) husband."


😱😱😱😱!?


This was a huge blunder.


It was completely obvious that I had forgotten his existence.


If James had just told me in a whisper, I could have greeted him properly 🥹🥹


So that's why he had that reaction when I greeted him in Swahili 😅


But wait, I've only seen him once, right?


Then James said,

"I think you've met him a few times in the village. Did you forget his face?"

Well, I don't remember the faces of my sister-in-law's husbands!


Because no one introduces themselves 🤣

When I'm in the village, I'm too intimidated to ask, "Who are you?"


Man, I really did something rude 😭
And that person owns a significant number of cows,


so he's a person of relatively high standing in the neighborhood.


He must have been shocked because I acted like a stranger 😓


I'm sorry.


I sincerely thought, "Please, I beg you, everyone wear a name tag until I get used to it" 😂


I want to make a family tree.


No, there are too many people, it would be endless, right?

And since there are families with polygamy,


even among siblings, they have different mothers, which makes it even more complicated.


I guess this is a common struggle for Maasai wives, haha.