From the Field of Support, Today's Book 36: "Ordinary Consultation"

The 36th book I would like to introduce is "Ordinary Consultation" by Kaito Tohata.

I have previously introduced Mr. Tohata's "It's Hard to Be There" in this series as well.

I believe the appeal of Mr. Tohata's writing lies in how he moves freely between theory and practice.

Regarding support that was going well in the field in some way or another,

"I see, so I was following this kind of theoretical background without even knowing it."

I am often made to realize this.

This "Ordinary Consultation" was also one such book.

—

When we hear the word "consultation," we think of professional psychological support provided in a counseling room.

However, Mr. Tohata points out that in reality, "ordinary consultations" that take place daily between friends, supervisors and subordinates, colleagues, and family members are overwhelmingly larger in both number and scope.

If professional counseling is a well-maintained garden, ordinary consultation is like a meadow that stretches on forever.

Mr. Tohata explains this with the image of:

* Professional psychotherapy like pure gold
* An alloy made of practical knowledge from the field
* And the vast "ordinary consultation"

When you are in the world of mental health professions, you tend to think that professional consultation is the center.

But from the perspective of society as a whole, professional consultation is actually the exception.

I found this perspective very convincing.

—

When you continue working in support, the support can become heavy without you realizing it.

It is important to keep learning theories and techniques, but as a result,

"I must understand more deeply"

"I must intervene more appropriately"
feelings like these can become too strong.

When you remember the concept of "ordinary consultation" at such times, the tension in your shoulders eases.

Consultation is, by nature, something softer that naturally arises between people.

—

What left a particularly deep impression on me was the

"10 Rules for a Beginner Counselor Who Experienced a Termination of Contract"

included at the end of the book.

In it, words to the effect of

"The termination has happened. However, there were parts where you were helpful to the client"

"You were not 'less than a counselor.' You existed in front of the client as a counselor"

are written.

When I read this part, I felt very encouraged.

—

People tend to look only at what they couldn't do.

Especially since counseling and support work are about the connection between people themselves,

the experience of

"it didn't go well"

expands not only to a lack of skill, but even to

"Perhaps I don't have the aptitude as a supporter"

"What am I even doing this job for in the first place?"

Isn't this a feeling that anyone who has actually done support work has experienced at least a little?

—

Mr. Tohata's letter draws close to the heart of such a supporter.

"Sleep well tonight"

"When you feel a little better, I will say some stricter things"

"When you don't feel well, eat some eel"

Such words follow.

He doesn't dig too deep into the content of the consultation.

But he doesn't abandon you.

There is an exquisite sense of distance there, like small talk at a day care center.

It is truly an "ordinary consultation."

—

When I tried to reserve Mr. Tohata's latest work at the Yokohama City Library, there was a 300-person waiting list.

I was surprised.

But at the same time, I was convinced.

Perhaps we are currently seeking not just professional answers, but

someone who will listen to us with their shoulders a little more relaxed,

someone who will think with us,

and someone who will say "it's still okay."

The number of 300 people waiting is likely a sign of how many people are starving for "ordinary consultation."