Overcoming One Hurdle

Today was my partner's surgery.
The surgery was originally scheduled to take 8 hours, but I was called in for an explanation from the doctor after about 6 hours, and I was able to see my partner 7 hours after it began.

According to the doctor's explanation, there was no metastasis found upon opening the abdomen, and it did not end up being as extensive as previously anticipated.
Even so, when I signed the paper listing the blood loss in numbers, I felt once again that it had been a major surgery.

I'm relieved. I'm truly relieved.
When I returned to the waiting room with the signed symptom explanation form, I felt all my strength drain away at once.

Of course, it goes without saying that my partner had the hardest time, but I still realized that I had been pushing myself quite hard. The amount of housework I had to do increased, and while I was using a fair amount of resources to think about menus and go grocery shopping, I had been preparing since the day before, especially on the day of the surgery, moving from early in the morning to make sure I could get to the hospital early.

The feeling of 'Next is this, I have to do that too, I need to tell the kids this... oh, it's already this time' was particularly strong from yesterday through today.

There are many people who handle everything all by themselves.
To begin with, the starting point of this whole situation was that the discovery was delayed, and regarding the stage of the illness, it was a matter of 'as long as they can stay alive.'

It's not that I want to say I can't afford to complain, but while I was waiting, I brought my fountain pen and MD notebook and wrote various things down. As I remembered everything that had happened up to this point, I also felt that I wanted to properly acknowledge what I had done myself.

That said, as a practical matter, it will still take several weeks for my partner to be discharged, and this week is packed with work, my side job, and events for the children.

Since I had been focusing on today, I will have to start looking at the weather and work schedule for the rest of the week again starting tomorrow, think about what kind of meals are necessary, and do the shopping for them.

I will keep doing my best in my current life from here on out.
It felt like the moment you defeat a big boss in a stage, or like one season of an anime has ended.

Also, once things settle down, I want to exchange many words with my partner through text communication and when I go to visit, since I couldn't put anything into words today.