🎸 Middle-Aged Guitarist Series 16: The 'Most Nervous in Front of Family' Edition

The problem of suddenly feeling 'shy' in front of family

The middle-aged guitarist who is confident at the live house.
Holding a long tone under the spotlight,
and even turning feedback into an ally,
he looks like a respectable 'active rocker' to anyone watching.

……And yet.

For some reason, he suddenly shrinks in front of his family.

Not his playing, but his very existence.

That is a mysterious phenomenon
happening in households all across the country.

■1. Becoming abnormally sensitive only to the presence of family

Even though he doesn't usually care about the faint noise coming from the amp,
when playing at home—

'Hmm? Did I hear footsteps on the stairs?'
'Did the door just open?'

He develops hearing like a wild animal sensing prey.

Yet, his musical harmony has been a bit shaky lately.

■2. The mysterious volume setting of '1.5' on the amp

The man who said 'Let's go with volume 5!' at the live show,
gently turns the dial on his amp at home,

'1... no, 1.5 it is.'

He's strangely precise.

Moreover, when his family is washing dishes in the kitchen,
he turns the volume up to '2' as if to say, 'Now the sound will be drowned out!'

When the dishwashing ends, he turns it back to '1.5'.
He's matching his tempo to the housework, not the music.

■3. His 'expression becomes like a Showa-era music show' only in front of family

Strangely enough,
the moment a family member crosses the room,
for some reason, his facial muscles start to tense up.

The corners of his mouth lift halfway,
his eyes dart around,
and he looks somewhat like a singer on a Showa-era music program.

Family: "...What's with that face?"
Middle-aged guy: "Does it look like that?"
Family: "It does (I'm sure of it)."

■④ Tension plummets when family walks by during a solo

The concentration that never breaks at a live show
collapses mercilessly at home.

When someone walks by during a solo—
my right-hand picking gets weaker.
my left hand makes a chord mistake.
for some reason, I turn down the volume.

The sound of family footsteps is a critical hit to a guitarist's psyche.

■⑤ So happy it makes me cry from just “one word” from family

Even though I'm that nervous,
I'm weak to a single word from my family.

"Today's song was pretty good."
"I think I like that phrase."

With these words,
a guy in his 50s
goes back to being on a high school festival stage.

While pumping my fist in my heart,
on the outside, I act cool, saying things like "Oh... really?"

But deep down,
"Maybe it's okay to set the amp to 2.5 just for today..."
I think.

■⑥ For some reason, the greatest shame of my life is being asked about my original songs

I'm totally fine with strangers listening at a live show, but
when my family listens to my original songs,
for some reason, my heart rate goes up.

The reason is unknown, but
family are the ultimate listeners.

Did I write weird lyrics?
Is the chord progression too dark?
I start to get strangely concerned.

The middle-aged guitarist's sense of shame
remains that of a high schooler only in this moment.

■⑦ Even so, family is the number one cheering squad

The person himself is shy, but
before he knows it, his family
is actually listening to his music properly.

"The video from the other day was better than before."
"Today's sound was light and airy."

On days when I'm told such things,
the middle-aged guitarist
is in high spirits for about three days.

I'm embarrassed, but happy.
I'm happy, but embarrassed.

This infinite loop is,
in a sense, deeper than rock.

■ Summary

Middle-aged guitarists
are confident on stage,
but are just ordinary dads at home.

But the moment they hold a guitar,
somewhere in their hearts, their 'former selves' come back to life.

And that figure, playing shyly in front of their family,
is rock,
is life,
and turns into an indescribable flavor.

The notes played with embarrassment
must surely be reaching their family just fine.